To demand my mother come and stay 10 days before due date.

[debbie1412]

I feel like the biggest twat going today. There's been some debate as to when my mum should come and stay with us so she can look after dc1 2 years. Im 38+4 and getting anxious about her being a 3 hour drive away. She doesn't drive so if I start going in the night it would be a mission to get her here. She wanted to come nxt wk end making me 39+3.
After having fairly sharp braxtons in the night I've woke up this morning, created blue murder on the phone demanding she come stay as off today as dp can pick her up without having to risk life and death belting up the motorway if I do start in the night.
So anyway she's now coming today and I'm feeling foolish and embarrassed. I'm praying I don't go 2 weeks over due as that's her down here for nearly a month.
Have i been a moron???
Dc1 was born at 39+4 ( think that's adding to my panic )

I think I completely understand where you are coming from. You are anxious, and you just want to know that your little one is going to be in safe hands should your baby decide to make a quick entrance. Give yourself a break. I can see me being the same second time around, I will want dd to be with my mum so I can get on with labour without worrying. Good luck, hope baby doesnt keep you waiting! x

I think you underestimate your dad being prepared to do the drive (which at 3am with empty roads wouldn't take as long as in the day), most companies would accept "I might be a bit late in work, my daughter went into labour and I had to drive my wife to my daughter's to look after my grandson while by daughter is having the baby".

However, it's done now. Fingers crossed the baby will arrive before next weekend...

I´d also be there for my daughter.

Although OP doesn´t need her mum yet, does she?

She wants her there just in case.

Lucky OP that her mum can turn up today & stay indefinitely.

send for your mummy. she loves you.

Op´s Mum is on the way/there by now isn´t she?

YABU, but I'm also 38+4 so I can understand your sense of urgency (although the buggers will probably keep us waiting 3 weeks yet!)

YANBU op I know if I called my mum upset and worried she would be here like a shot and I'm only 32 weeks right now. I may not 'demand' it but we'd both know what I needed and that would be support.

My mum lives 5 hrs away (on a food day) and we've worked out that it would be ridiculous for her to try and be here as mil is closer. I'd prefer my mum was here for the kids but it will all work out.

I'm sure your mum will be fine. Good luck with the birth!

I'm already cooking her a roast, I'm really not precious my god how harsh are you windsurf??? I'm concerned for DS I really want to introduce bb2 in a nice way. Not him being passed around like a parcel the 24hours prior to meeting he/she.
Bloody hell wish I'd never asked !

Well some of us had mums that worked so an indefinite stay just couldn´t have happened.

Other plans had to be made.

Debbie, if my dd needed me and phoned me like you did I would be there like a shot...

Pregnant woman here guys!!! Don't anger it!!

Good luck Debbie, she's your mom, it's all fine xx

I hope my mum will be there on demand when my time comes.

I love the idea that grown adults can still rely on their mum to drop everything and rush over. The idea of someone's mum booking an emergency flight with BA nearly brought me to tears but then I am overly emotional

Totally understand this OP- we were in a similar situation when I was pregnant with DD2- we had recently moved to a new area, didn't know many people, the plan was for MIL to come and stay when I went into labour to look after 2yo DD1, but she lived 5 hours away.

Our 'back up' people were the only friends we had with no kids. I hav v strong braxton hicks at 38 weeks, called them to let them know we might need them, turns out they had gone away for the weekend

In the end MIL came to stay when I was 39 weeks, I ended up being induced at 40 + 12 - longest bloody 3 weeks of my life!

YABU unless you gave birth in about an hour last time.

I worried so much as we were in a similar position when DS3 was born a year ago (today, in fact!). As luck would have it, DH was able to take the older boys to nursery then get a cab back to the hospital in time to be useless my birthing partner and see DS3 born. My understanding had been that my mum would immediately get in the car when I told her it was time (she lives 200 miles away) so she could babysit. She didn't but it all turned out ok in the end. A friend was able to collect me and DS3 from the hospital and DH brought the others home from nursery while I had a nap. All in all, I was only in labour for 4 hours (shock to me at least) and was in hospital for 8 hours total. I was prepared to give birth alone, but I'm really glad I didn't have to.

Out of interest what did your mum say op?

YABU BUT u'll be forgiven. I had a breakdown when my mum said she was going on holiday until 15th Jan because i was due 10 days later tears and everything, i have no other DC and she wasn't my birth partner but the thought of her being far away sent me into melt down. Ds didn't come until 2nd Feb but i was forgiven thinking back makes me cringe i was like a 2 year old crying because my mummy was leaving me i've no idea what came over me!

Debbie - YANBU. My Mum would be delighted if I asked her to some and stay with us for a few weeks. Delighted.

I think your mum sounds bloody marvellous, dropping everything to put her life on hold for the foreseeable future.

Treasure her.

Oh I don't think you're unreasonable op. You're pregnant and panicking. Its no big deal. If your mum didn't want to come then she wouldn't. If my dd needed me, irrationally or not, I'd be there like a shot. And I'd be happy to do that.

I think YANBU well maybe the demand bit, but having her there now seems reasonable to me. I never made it as far as you are now with either of mine, so you could pop at anytime. and If you were my Dd I'd want to see you and spend time before baby comes anyway, enjoy her company, eat lunch out, take the Dd to soft play or the park together, it'll be nice.

She said no problem, she wasn't protesting about coming she was trying to make me see it could be another 3 weeks. I'm walking around thinking I'm a ticking time bomb she was just saying, maybe wait another wk.
Diddl just wondering, what's your problem??

ok, i was late. but the principle applied. you sent for your mum, she loves you, she came. i like that. well done all.

YANBU.

This is a stressful situation and that's exactly what family is there for- to support you when you need them most.

You are pregnant, hormonal and anxious about going into labour, all of which is completely understandable.

Asking her to come asap may have been a tad hysterical, but then again as a woman about to deliver within a couple of weeks you are entitled to be hysterical;)
At least you didn't order her to just turn up on her own and sent DP to pick her up.

To the ladies who questioned the partner's role when OP goes into labour I will have to point out that presumably OP wants him to accompany her to the hospital (hardly unreasonable). Somebody will have to be present with her first child in order for that to happen. It is also a bit presumptuous to assume she actually has a "friend or neighbour" she can ask to come round for those 3 hours. Maybe she doesn't...

I don´t have a problem.

You´re just so lucky to have a mum who can do that.

My Ils and husband only an hr away but I had a back plan in case I needed to go before anyone got to me.

You wrote this..After having fairly sharp braxtons in the night I've woke up this morning, created blue murder on the phone demanding she come stay as off today as dp can pick her up without having to risk life and death belting up the motorway if I do start in the night.....but think I'm harsh for calling you 'precious'???!

Erm. Ok! If you say so!

Yh I do say so, it's in no way me being precious. My concern is for my son NOT myself.