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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask how much you drink?

142 replies

JerryLeadbetter · 17/10/2012 20:55

Just that really. Bit worried that I might drink a bit too much. I was always a party animal Pre-children, and now I have two small DCs I don't drink anywhere near as much as I did, but still have at least one weekend night out with friends/ DP where I get quite, erm, merry, plus a glass of wine or two most nights.

I find it hard to judge what is the norm as most of my friends don't have children yet and go out a lot, but most of the mum friends I have met at toddler groups (who are fab) really drink very little on a regular basis, maybe the odd big night out, so I'm not really sure where I fit in!

Just been thinking about it a bit lately and reckon I'd feel healthier and a lot less sluggish if I laid off it a bit...

OP posts:

mamamibbo · 18/10/2012 10:37

nothing at all, i have a child with sen and 3 small children to look after so i dont drink

Original poster

JerryLeadbetter · 18/10/2012 13:21

Hmmm some serious food for thought here. Whilst I definitely don't NEED a drink, and actually found it pretty easy to not drink whilst pg, I certainly fit some of the criteria of the 'alcohol' abuse list.

I think I feel pressure (mainly from myself) to still maintain a 'fun' image even though i'm now a mum, especially, as i said before, most of my school/uni friends don't have children yet (i'm 29). I don't want them to think that i'm dull, which I know is ridiculous, as the older I get the more I realise there is nothing duller than someone who is off their tits drunk!

I also grew up in a naice respectable family, but who drank like fish, and drinking was sometimes encouraged and certainly never discouraged. I remember sharing bottles of wine with my mum at 15/16 and her (and my friends' parents) driving us into town to go to the pubs, and then collect us afterwards. So it has always been on my radar I guess...

I really don't want DS and DD to grow up with the same attitude to alcohol but not sure what the best strategy would be They're still tiny at the moment so hopefully don't have to worry for a good few years, but would be interested to hear from others with older children how they are approaching the subject? Would you/do you let them drink a bit? Not at all? Have proper chats about the dangers?

OP posts:

Lottapianos · 18/10/2012 13:32

Jerry, I don't have children myself but myself and my 2 siblings have all had problems with alcohol. I think a lot of it is down to my parents 'forbidden fruit' attitude to drinking - they drank very occasionally in front of us but we were not allowed to touch it ever until we were 18. On pain of death Well, that was the theory, but because it was forbidden, it became a great big deal and a challenge, and a way to rebel and I could not wait to sneak out and get smashed when I turned 15. I had no idea how to drink responsibly until I was in my late 20s. I think there is a lot to be said for the French/Italian model where children of around 5+ are given a little drop of wine in a glass of water at special occasions. It then just becomes a normal part of life, nothing terribly exotic or exciting, just part of having a special meal. I think some parents also forget that you have to learn how to drink - you don't just magically know your limits, you have to test the boundaries a little and possibly overindulge once or twice. Your teens are probably going to test their boundaries with alcohol and it's safer to do that at home.

All that said, I do think we have a pretty worrying attitude to alcohol in this country where some people still brag about how smashed they got, and what a banging hangover they have like it's a badge of honour. It can't be easy bringing up children to have a healthy attitude to alcohol when they will be hearing this all around them.

MeFour · 18/10/2012 13:37

I probably have a maximum of ten drinks a year
I drink milky coffee and eat cake at those times when other people would have a glass of wind

ethelb · 18/10/2012 13:41

I'm surprised that people think this is light drinking. Drinking half a bottle is classed as heavy drinking by the gov.
I'm no angel at all but remember a thread in here where there were a load of leave the bastards as he had a beer or two every might. You can't tell on mn!

ArielThePiraticalMermaid · 18/10/2012 13:41

Have you ever felt the need to cut back on your drinking? occasionally
Is it hard for you to stop drinking after one or two drinks? occasionally
When you?re sober do you regret what you?ve done while drinking? ocasionally
Do you consume more than seven alcoholic beverages a week? generally

Apparently I have an alcohol problem

ArielThePiraticalMermaid · 18/10/2012 13:42

PS am intrigued by the notion of a glass of wind, MeFour.

MeFour · 18/10/2012 13:49

It's vairy expensive ariel

gingercat12 · 18/10/2012 13:51

DH and I stopped altogether, as we do not have the time or inclination. It is not intentional, just happened.

KellyElly · 18/10/2012 13:59

I don't drink nightly but around once a week I'll have a bottle of wine (with food) in an evening. If I have a very rare night out I won't tell you how much I drink as I will get called a binge drinker . I don't get legless ever though as I can handle alcohol (which apparently means I have spent years hard drinking to gain the tolerance to some on MN ).

OhWouldYouJust · 18/10/2012 16:00

I drink once a week on a fri/sat night, 2 glasses of wine or 2 bottles beer maximum. Any more and im parking my car in hangover city!

ClippedPhoenix · 18/10/2012 16:04

Im a "depends who I'm with" one. I drink loads with my naughty mates, drink a bit with my steady friends and I drink nothing with my teetotal ones.

x2boys · 18/10/2012 16:41

i very rarely go out these days combination of two small children , and me an dh both work shifts opposite each other for childcare plus money tight but we have a large vodka each most nights just the one but rather large!

FidgetPie · 20/10/2012 22:19

I'm on a diet at the moment so have given up drinking other than one glass of wine a week. It is nice not feeling groggy in the mornings so I might try and keep it up.

lovebunny · 20/10/2012 22:32

two or three units a year, apparently!

IfNotNowThenWhen · 20/10/2012 23:05

One bottle of wine a week, bought on Friday and glugged very gratefully over the weekend!
If I had more money, I would probably drink double that.
Alchohol is highly addictive, but, if you can control it, very nice sometimes!
If you think you may be having trouble controlling your drinking, then stop. Don't cut down, stop. Wait a month and see how you feel then.

Butkin · 20/10/2012 23:08

I did have a glass of beer on Wednesday night because we went out for a chinese meal. Probably the first booze I've drunk for a few months though. May have had two or three glasses of champagne this year when just being polite at parties.

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