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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how much you drink?

142 replies

JerryLeadbetter · 17/10/2012 20:55

Just that really. Bit worried that I might drink a bit too much. I was always a party animal Pre-children, and now I have two small DCs I don't drink anywhere near as much as I did, but still have at least one weekend night out with friends/ DP where I get quite, erm, merry, plus a glass of wine or two most nights.

I find it hard to judge what is the norm as most of my friends don't have children yet and go out a lot, but most of the mum friends I have met at toddler groups (who are fab) really drink very little on a regular basis, maybe the odd big night out, so I'm not really sure where I fit in!

Just been thinking about it a bit lately and reckon I'd feel healthier and a lot less sluggish if I laid off it a bit...

OP posts:
CrackerJackShack · 18/10/2012 07:27

Jeez. I feel like an absolute alcoholic. I drink two bottles of sparkling wine on a Thursday evening (which is the start of the weekend) with DH & friends. usually have a glass or two or a beer or two on Friday. Nothing Saturday, nothing Sunday. 3 glasses on Monday/Tuesday and none Wednesday.

FolkGhoul · 18/10/2012 07:28

I don't have any issues with alcohol but I don't really drink either.

There are occasions when I will go out and drink at little bit more, but I mean 2 or 3 glasses of wine rather than one.

I always ask for a small glass of wine and only ever drink one.

I tend to drink soft drinks/sparkling water if I go out.

DH and I have a small (125ml) glass of wine at the weekends, but generally, I only have one. I might have another in the week.

So probably somewhere between 2 and 3 units on an average week and I never go over the limit.

winkle2 · 18/10/2012 08:47

Spooky and Irish - I agree with the healthy lifestyle yet overdrinking. This is what I've been trying to drum into my husband all year! That even of you're eating all your green veg and exercising every other day doesn't give you free reign to guzzle beer like its going out of fashion!

Think he's finally got the message!

BlingBubbles · 18/10/2012 08:55

I don't drink at all during the week but then on Friday and sat I might have a couple of glasses of wine, if we go out to friends house then maybe a little bit more. I have never drank during the week even before I had my DD, but then I would go out note weekends and have a good party... Those were the days Grin

SugariceAndScary · 18/10/2012 08:57

Thing is, I love a glass of wine especially when preparing food, there's nothing nicer than chopping away in the kitchen and something bubbling away on the hob with a glass on the side while you're pottering away.

I appreciate the hazards of too much booze but I make an informed decision when I drink,I'm going to die of something and I don't want to live til I'm really elderly .

I too eat well, exercise and take plenty of supplements but I do like my wine at night.

thebody · 18/10/2012 08:58

Hi op, I have drinking and non drinking days so mon, tues, thurs are defiantly carved in stone as alcohol free.

Have half a bott wed ( not always) and on sun( not always) then a bit more fri and sat...

I couldn't survive my life if I didn't unwind with alcohol but each to their own.

Lottapianos · 18/10/2012 09:03

I worry about my DP's drinking. I've noticed it more since I've cut down in the last few months. He drinks practically every single night and struggles to sleep without it. He drinks about a bottle of wine most nights, probably nearly 2 bottles on Fri and Sat night. He gulps it down, drinks a glass of wine in 10 minutes easily. It's always in the evenings, never in the day. He's embarassed about it because he takes some of the empties to the recycling bin in the middle of the week rather than put them all out together where the neighbours can see. He feels that he's overweight and I know that's mostly down to the booze. I say nothing because I know it's his decision and i can't make him stop but it worries me and irritates me Sad

Sorry, probably the wrong thread for this....

VerySmallSqueak · 18/10/2012 09:04

RichMan what you say is definitely true for me too.

I equate sitting down with a nice glass of wine as chillin' time very often.

But I have been training myself,and actually coming to like, a nice cup of camomile tea in the evening as a relaxing treat sometimes instead.

Rock and roll.

fatlazymummy · 18/10/2012 09:09

I have been teetotal for 2 years now. Before that I used to drink 3-4 bottles of wine a week with maybe the odd 1/2 bottle of vodka or some sort of pre mixed cocktail.
Looking at your OP I noticed you said you drink 1 or 2 glasses of wine a night. Obviously that can vary quite a bit as to strength and amount, and I would suggest you try measuring and monitoring the units that you are drinking and that will help you assess your actual intake better. You may be a little bit shocked by the results!
To answer your final question, yes you probably will feel less sluggish and healthier if you do lay off it for a little while. Why not give it a go and see how you feel?

Arthurfowlersallotment · 18/10/2012 09:10

In my child free days I would easily drink a bottle of wine in a night. Usually went out Thursday, Friday and Saturday where I'd be drunk at least one of the nights.

Now.... I've been out twice in the past six months.. Home by 11pm and had about two glasses of wine.

I'll also have a glass on a Friday night.

HorraceTheOtter · 18/10/2012 09:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

holmessweetholmes · 18/10/2012 09:46

Used to drink shedloads as a student and in my twenties and early thirties, to the point where I now wonder how I got away with it (in terms of health and not becoming completely hooked). Gave up when pregnant with dd and had cut down massively while ttc and didn't find it hard at all for some reason. I was always a bit 'all or nothing' about drinking, and found it hard to ever stick to one or two drinks, but found post-dc that it made me feel quite rubbish - not just the next day, but the same night. That has lessened a bit now, but over the last few years I seem to have finally learned to be a moderate and occasional drinker ! Tbh OP, you are probably drinking enough to affect your health and well-being a little bit. You'd probably feel better by cutting down a bit, as many people would.

shewhowines · 18/10/2012 09:59

All these replies are going against the arguments that it is naice middle class women who are the heavy drinkers in this country. Don't all the critics of Mumsnet argue that we are all naice mc women?

I made a conscious effort to cut back to a glass or two with several alcohol free days inbetween, as I too poured the wine with a sigh of relief that the kids were in bed virtually every night. It was nice though.........

fluffyraggies · 18/10/2012 10:06

At home - a JD on a Friday night, a few more on Saturday night. Sometimes enough to get pretty tiddly with my DH before wobbling to bed. Sometimes just a couple.

Out of home - none on family occasions as i'm usually driving and/or kids are with us.

Couple of times a year for adult occasions - i'll get totally wrecked, staggering and swearing drunk :)

ArielThePiraticalMermaid · 18/10/2012 10:07

shewhowines, yes that conclusion could be drawn, though there is also the rather large possibility that posters have seen what has been written so far and decided against "owning up" about how much they drink, because they think it might make them look like alcoholics. According to my post, I'm one of the heavier drinkers on MN, but from what I have seen on other threads, I know I'm not.

MeerkatMerkin · 18/10/2012 10:12

Don't drink Mon-Thurs. Friday night will have a G&T and share a bottle or two of wine with DH. Saturday we might have the equivalent of a bottle or two of wine over the course of the day, depends whether we pop to the pub/see friends - although we don't start drinking as soon as we get up! I mean more an afternoon pint after a dog walk, then wine with dinner and perhaps another wine or two in the evening. Sunday a bottle of red shared to accompany lunch.

I think it's probably a bit too much to be honest. It is very much "in our culture" - DH is Italian and his family are "upper class alcoholics" - drinking alcohol is a very social thing for them and it is unheard of not to have a G&T whilst cooking dinner and catching up with the family, then wine with the meal, etc. They drink daily whereas we limit ourselves for health and financial reasons, and also because I am still breastfeeding toddler DS (although will still limit when I stop).

Haven't got a problem going without it, it's just habit really to wind down at the weekend with booze. Bet I'd be a lot thinner if I gave it up!

MTBMummy · 18/10/2012 10:17

I'm not a big drinker, I may have a glass or 2 at the weekend if we're out or hosting friends for dinner.

I do have the odd night when I'm out at an event for work mid week, and again I'll have a glass or 2 of wine then.

SoulTrain · 18/10/2012 10:18

On a Friday night after work DH and I make our weekly pilgrimage to Tesco where we buy 8 beers and a bottle of wine. This is then consumed over Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. It's our wind down and we don't have to have it but i do bloody look forward to it. It wasn't hard for me not to drink when I was pregnant and I'm aware of drink dependency (mother is a recovering alcoholic) and I think that's the issue - do you HAVE to have it? Is it impacting other areas of your life?

We're not strict with it, if there's a beer or something left over in the week one of us might have it, or if we had friends over we would drink mid week.

StuntNun · 18/10/2012 10:19

OP you might be asking the wrong question. The very fact that you are asking suggests that you think you are drinking too much. I don't think there is a right quantity; my dad drinks about 15 units a week, my mum has about 2 units a month, that's just what suits their own lifestyles, personalities and habits. Neither drinks 'too much'. (I can't comment on my own consumption because I'm currently off the sauce due to pregnancy.)

It may be more beneficial for you to consider the way you drink. Do you have a drink every day? Do you sometimes 'need a drink because you're stressed out'? Do you have to make extra trips to the off licence because you've run out of booze? If you start a bottle of wine do you have to finish the bottle because otherwise it's a waste? Do you always have wine with your Sunday lunch? Do you ever drink a large amount in a single night. In my opinion it's more important to make sure you're drinking for the right reasons, e.g. you fancy a glass of wine, than because you need to. My DH can't leave half a bottle of wine, he has to drink it all that night. But why not? Why not save it for the next day or use it for cooking or just pour it down the sink if it wasn't that great to start with. That's when drinking starts to become a problem, you're doing it out of some form of compusion rather than a desire for a tipple.

ellargh · 18/10/2012 10:21

Not much as I can't afford to. I drink rarely at home and go out once every three or four months where I throw them back on a cheap student night in town.

PostBellumBugsy · 18/10/2012 10:28

Virtually nothing. I'm a single parent & worry too much that if something happened to the DCs and I'd been drinking, I wouldn't be able to drive them to hospital.

I may have a drink when I go out, but given I am nearly always driving only one or two glasses of wine.

I used to be a real party animal & would drink heavily on nights out, but I've never been a drink every night of the week person.

Beanbagz · 18/10/2012 10:31

DH and i share 1-2 bottles of wine a week. Very occasionally i'll have a beer if we're eating curry. If we're working at the weekend or if my DH is away and i'm on my own then i don't drink at all.

During the week (Mon-Thurs) i don't drink and if i'm driving i don't drink any alcohol at all (even though i could probably safely have a small glass of wine).

However when i do drink i don't feel the need to hide it from my children (10 & 7) as i would like them to grow up with a healthy and sensible attitude to drinking.

TiAAAAARGHo · 18/10/2012 10:32

When not pregnant I would have a gin and tonic on a Friday night. If it had been a very very long week I would have a double. Other than that I would only drink when I couldn't get out of it (I'm generally not bothered for drinking other than my friday night g&t but it is effectively compulsory at work do's so I would become the person nursing a single glass all night).

CrackerJackShack · 18/10/2012 10:35

Well here's something:

Alcoholism Signs: When Do You Know You?re an Alcoholic?

If you want to know if your alcohol abuse has crossed the line into alcoholism, ask yourself the following questions:

  • Have you ever felt the need to cut back on your drinking?
  • Do you get upset when people ask questions about your drinking?
  • Do you feel guilty about your drinking?
  • Do you hide your drinking from friends and family by hiding empty bottles or lying about consumption?
  • Is it hard for you to stop drinking after one or two drinks?
  • Do you often have to drink ?the hair of the dog? in order to get over a hangover or steady the shakes in the morning?
  • Do you consume more than seven alcoholic beverages a week?
  • Do you keep alcohol in unusual places at home, work or in the car?
  • Do you often drink to the point of blackout or passing out?
  • When you?re sober do you regret what you?ve done while drinking?
  • Have you promised a loved one to stop drinking or cut back on your drinking and failed?
  • Has your drinking caused problems meeting responsibilities at home, work or school?
  • Do you worry that a party or social function won?t have enough alcohol so you have a few drinks before you go or bring your own?
  • Have you had legal problems because of your drinking, such as a DUI?
  • Do you experience withdrawal symptoms if you don?t drink, such as nausea, sweating and shaking?

Now I think some of these are subjective. As I don't know anyone who hasn't done something stupid once or twice whilst drinking, especially in college. Wink

FlaminNoraImPregnantPanda · 18/10/2012 10:35

One or two on holiday or at Christmas if I'm in the mood, otherwise nothing. (Obviously not even that now)