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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think slings vs prams is a daft debate.....

200 replies

crackcrackcrak · 15/10/2012 12:38

I have both so what do I know.....
But I have friends now almost at war about it. AIBU to think its just a personal preference based in ease of use (both) that's just been hijacked as a superior parenting choice?

OP posts:
Fairylea · 15/10/2012 13:57

I must have the only baby who hates a sling. EBay have done well out of all the ones I've tried !

Indith · 15/10/2012 14:04

It does work both ways though. Ds2 is 99.9% of the time in the sling because with the 2 big ones I find it far easier to stick him in there so I can hold both hands when crossing roads and so on. He is only 7 month but even last July before school broke up I was starting to get the "he'll be getting too heavy for that" comments.

Original poster
crackcrackcrak · 15/10/2012 14:06

Well I know a v crazy person who runs a sling meet.......

OP posts:
TenThousandGoodMornings · 15/10/2012 14:06

I've tried 4 different hires from the local sling meet - my baby hates all of them! Really bad hysterical crying when in one.

I actually love the theory behind 'baby wearing' and want to do it but the sling meet have actually been really judgmental about DS not liking slings. As if it's a reflection on how bonded we are, DS is a nightmare of a baby, reflux and colic etc but it was a very snotty attitude I got when I said DS just does not like slings.

Tailtwister · 15/10/2012 14:09

I have used both and love they both (slings and prams I mean). Loved my stretchy wrap sling when DS2 was small and Ergo when he was bigger.

I've never had comments about using a pram, but lots using a sling. Lots of people poking their (uninformed and unwanted) noses in, making comments about how it looked unsafe, what if you fall over etc etc. Extremely tedious.

INeedThatForkOff · 15/10/2012 14:10

Ha! A friend of mine has just responded to a photo on FB 'calling all natural mamas' garnering orders for yet another sling (friend had several already).

So, am I an unnatural mama because I stick to my bog standard Baby Bjorn from Boots?!

InherentlyCantankerous · 15/10/2012 14:11

are you in the South Crack?

SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 15/10/2012 14:13

I do like slings, and I adore prams! I still own 2, even though my dcs are teenagers. However... I think that tiny babies in slings look sweet and snuggly. Older babies facing out and with arms and legs sticking out at odd angles, however, look to me like you have a parasitic twin! Confused

Original poster
crackcrackcrak · 15/10/2012 14:16

Baby bjorn?? Heresy heresy!

Yes to being in the south.....

OP posts:
Original poster
crackcrackcrak · 15/10/2012 14:16

Omg at parasitic twin....Grin

OP posts:
Tailtwister · 15/10/2012 14:17

Baby Bjorn slings have had some bad press in the past regarding how they are supposed to put pressure on a baby's pelvis. I don't know how valid that information is, but it did make me get rid of the one I had for DS1.

choceyes · 15/10/2012 14:22

I have used both. I wore DD in a Connecta almost constantly in her first 6 months as she would not tolerate the baby section of the Phil and Teds (I'm suprised any baby would tbh, it looks like a deep dark cave and you can't get the baby out of it without major faff). I wore her daily up to about 15 months, although only for short times every day. She still likes it.

I have had so many comments from people about carrying her, "isn't she heavy", "she'll outgrow it soon", "doesn't your back hurt" etc etc. One lovely day even said how she's known of a baby that died whilst in a sling Hmm I wouldn't DREAM of judging other peoples parenting choices like that, but sling wearers are fair game so it seems.

On the otherhand, I love my buggy (not the phil and teds, the bugaboo). I love the fact that you can put loads of shopping in it. I hate using just a sling, cos there is nowhere to put anything more than your purse (and ofcourse you have to carry your bulky cloth nappies around too Wink).

I have been to a couple of sling meets, people were always friendly and helpful.

elliejjtiny · 15/10/2012 14:29

I have an ergo for ds3 (21m) as ds2 is a wheelchair user. My back aches when I use it and I'm really not keen on it. I was wondering whether to go to my local sling meet to try and find out if there is anything I'm doing wrong or maybe try another sling but I'm worried they will judge me for not enjoying having a toddler tied to me.

AlwaysHoldingOnToStarbug · 15/10/2012 14:30

I used both, it depended on my mood and what I was doing. Going up Snowdon with a 3 year old in a sling is easier than using a pushchair or letting him walk v v slowly. Luckily he is a tiny boy so not too much weight.

I know people who go to sling meets and who are "crunchy" They're perfectly normal and nice, if a bit fanatic. I've never been to a sling meet myself as there were none nearby when my were younger. I probably would have done otherwise. But I did love my pushchair as well - I always chose one with a huge basket to fit loads of shopping!

theodorakis · 15/10/2012 14:38

Bloodyhell, in the ME we have barely left behind "getting the maid to carry it" being the only mode of baby transport. I am trying so hard not to take the piss out of sling meets, really I am but what are they? Who goes to them? What is wrong with prams? When did this happen? How long have I been away?
Are these people related to the virgin guts?

theodorakis · 15/10/2012 14:40

I am not taking the piss out of people like choceyes by the way, but do some people really think prams are unnatural parenting? I thought some people used slings because they were more convenient, especially if they had other young children. I had no idea it was a lifestyle/social choice.

Teapot13 · 15/10/2012 14:41

I had a sling when DD was born but we could not figure out how to put her in without dropping her. (She also had to wear a host of orthopaedic devices in her first year.) I was kind of thinking of looking into a BabyBjorn (which I realize is NOT a "sling") but had only gotten as far as asking the orthopaedic surgeon who was treating her for hip dysplasia and clubfoot if there was any reason I shouldn't use one. She assured me that it is fine for the hips and she uses one for her own daughter.

Then I was at our SureStart centre and the sling people were going on and on to some poor woman about how she needed a sling, NOT a BabyBjorn, because slings help babies' hips and BabyBjorns cause hip dysplasia and back problems. It all made me so livid that I went RIGHT to MotherCare and bought a BabyBjorn.

As DH said when I told him the saga, I sure showed them. . .

MaryZed · 15/10/2012 14:43

I often wonder what radical true babywearers do if they have two close together. Do they sling them both simultaneously (and if so, which on front, which on back), or do they have to make a decision which child to "neglect" by placing it in a pram?

It must be so difficult.

MaryZed · 15/10/2012 14:47

Oh my goodness Shock. Look at this and this

How on earth do you get them in and out safely, much less actually do anything while using one hand to balance each? And it must be a tad scary if one is a struggler.

CailinDana · 15/10/2012 14:48

Like I said, the basic idea of sling meets is really good - slings can be bloody expensive (£53 for a length of stretchy material, I kid you not) and it can take a while to find one that works for you so the opportunity to try them out and hire them is great.

What I found odd is that when I said I didn't think slings were for me as my back couldn't take them the ladies at the meet were all but distraught and spent an hour strapping me into 5 different slings trying to convince me that I wasn't actually horrendously uncomfortable. It was almost as if by saying I couldn't manage slings I was saying I couldn't deal with being a proper parent and they were trying to "save" me. I ran out of the place and never went back. It was just too weird.

theodorakis · 15/10/2012 14:50

I love the fact the babywearing website I looked at (still reeling that such a thing exists) says it is a MUST because of when you fly, go on the Tube or go to a festival! Is this a middle class fashion only?

Tailtwister · 15/10/2012 14:55

I had a friend with twins and she used to carry them in a wrap when they were small (one on either side). I think she used a double buggy when they were bigger. She wasn't particularly 'radical' though, despite the fact she owned a sling business.

Tbh, who really cares? I often wonder how people have the energy to comment on other people's choices when they have their own baby to care for. Surely it really doesn't matter what other people do?

theodorakis · 15/10/2012 14:58

I don't care how people carry their own babies but if anyone said I was a bad parent for using a pram I would punch them on the nose. If there was time to pull it out of their middle class arse that is.

YoullLaughAboutItOneDay · 15/10/2012 15:03

Your friends are very odd. But may I ask whether they are possibly first time mums with young babies? Honestly, I found maternity leave with my first pretty deathly dull, much as I loved her. And I am currently a SAHM mum to two, so it's not as if I don't get on with the 'SAH' bit, it's the 'just one baby' bit I didn't get along with.

If you feel a bit starved of actual 'things' to think about, you can go a bit odd. Really unimportant things can seem very important indeed. And you are so desparate to be doing a 'good job' you want the validation of everyone else parenting exactly the same way you do.

I honestly think our modern ways of living have a lot to answer for. It's basically a mental health issue.

Original poster
crackcrackcrak · 15/10/2012 15:05

Ha ha no! Our kids are 3+!

OP posts:
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