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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be annoyed at dr's comment?

106 replies

susiegrapevine · 04/10/2012 19:28

Ok so went for 6 week postnatal check for me and ds2 and the doctor was asking about feeding and I said yes I am breast feeding so she said oh so his poo's will still smell quiet sweet then she said 'when you start mixed feeding then his poo's will smell horrible'!! So I just said back I don't think well be doing that somehow I breast fed ds1 for 18 months.

The point is I never even mentioned any desire to use formula or mix feed. Am annoyed because of the assumtion I will mix feed and because I thought the nhs were supposed to be encouraging breast feeding! I have nothing against anyone who choses to mix feed or formula feed its there choice but I feel my doctor should not be making an asumptions about how I feed my baby!!

OP posts:

catgirl1976 · 04/10/2012 20:25

That is offensive monkey

ScariestFairyByFar · 04/10/2012 20:26

When I took dd for six week check I was treated like a celebrity for still bfing and some sort of god when I said she'd not had any formula! Though my gp surgery was in an area where hv have to fight rusks off grannys who want to put them in the bottle from 6 weeks!

monkeysbignuts · 04/10/2012 20:26

I know! I could understand if he was 5 or 6 but 11 months old. she told me I was "in danger of having a toddler lifting up my top for milk"

catgirl1976 · 04/10/2012 20:28

Is that dangerous

She! I had assumed that had to be a male GP :(

TheSurgeonsMate · 04/10/2012 20:28

[shocked] monkey! We wouldn't want that. Not good for their health at all.

DelhiCalling · 04/10/2012 20:29

Yanbu she should be encouraging bf.

monkeysbignuts · 04/10/2012 20:31

you wouldn't think she had 5 of her own children and boasted that all were breast fed! I was goblins smacked.
As it happens I only lasted another 4 weeks because my little darling started biting me really hard :( lol.
blood blisters on the boobs is owchy!

monkeysbignuts · 04/10/2012 20:33

hahaaha sorry supposed to say gob smacked not fucking goblin smacked!! stupid phone

KenLeeeeeee · 04/10/2012 20:33

I think I get what the OP is saying tbh, and I don't think she's looking for a bun fight. It's easy to feel like EBF is something that people around you are waiting to go wrong and that introducing formula is inevitable. It's not necessarily an accurate portrayal of how people really see bf, but when you're tired and hormonal and anxious, that feeling easily runs away with you, and comments like "when you start mix feeding" can get to you.

HiHowAreYou · 04/10/2012 20:34

When I went for my booking in appointment yesterday she asked if I'd breastfed my last baby. I said yes, and she said "Good. Well done, good girl, good girl!"

I wondered if she scolded ff mums. "Bad lady! Failure! Naughty girl."

Firawla · 04/10/2012 20:35

yabu that is not something to be offended about, she was just making small talk you just ignore and move on!
monkey that comment is quite bad though, 11 months is not really that old at all!!

WongaDotMom · 04/10/2012 20:36

YANBU
It is annoying that health professionals are promoting formula when they should be promoting the BEST nutrition for your baby.

catgirl1976 · 04/10/2012 20:37

Oh, I must have missed the bit where the HP promoted formula..........

Hang on

Oh.......didn't happen.

As you were

IneedAsockamnesty · 04/10/2012 20:38

yabu because i opened this thread expecting something really jucy, like perhaps your gp wanted to shag your pet cat and now im rather let down.

fuck you can tell ive just had my first glass of wine in nearly 2 years

MordecaiAndTheRigbys · 04/10/2012 20:39

Honestly I think this is the most random stealth boast/ bunfight ever.

Let me tell you something that I think should serve us all well. No one gives a[sweet smelling] shit what you do, honestly. You are being defensive about your choices, gearing yourself up for a fight with someone who says you are wrong in what you chose to do so you snap at the first inoccuos comment.

And I get that, but for god sake, do us a favour, change doctor, hide this thread, pull your knickers out of their twist and enjoy the new baby!

AyeOopMoose · 04/10/2012 20:39

In my experience the NHS DOES NOT promote BF.

DD2 had to go back to hospital at 5 days as her weight had dropped by 12% (this happened with DD1 so I wasn't remotely worried). I was instantly bombarded with "give her some formula-it's what she needs" and was made to feel irresponsible for not doing so by nurses and care assistants.

Had I not BF DD1 for 14months and v confident in my abilities to BF I would have crumbled. I found this formula pressure far more upsetting than DD's weight loss. Fortunately after the weekend, I saw the consultant who confirmed she was fine and weight was increasing.

I'm all for choice (FF away if that's what you want to do) and was horrified that MY choice to want to EBF was not respected.

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 04/10/2012 20:46

Sockreturningpixie

and

PacificDogwood · 04/10/2012 20:52

Apologies to everybody who may have been put off their curry by my 'korma' remark but it's so brilliantly descriptive .

The main thing I am going to take from this thread is how very, very carefully one must weigh every word one says as a dr. Sigh. That will be hard for me, but I shall try.

The sad truth is that the vast majority of mothers in RL do not BF or do not BF for long. It is far more likely that a remark that is intended to encourage BFing will be seen as 'bullying' 'putting under pressure'.

I too am a bit that what the OP was told came from a female GP. However TBH if I saw a 6 week old baby in no way would I assume that they are likely to still be EBF. Maybe that is just the demographic were I work, but that is how it is.

I happen to have a huge interest in BFing, partially because I found it hard (looong boring story I shall spare you all), and partially because I find the very low BFing rates really upsetting, but frankly this discussion contributes to my impression that you are damned if you do, damned if you don't - promote or don't promote BFing with every uttance you make.

PacificDogwood · 04/10/2012 20:54

utterance sorry

SheppySheepdog · 04/10/2012 22:13

Never mind, perhaps she will have your medal ready for your next visit.

Only joking but in all seriousness, there are no prizes, take care of yourself and don't sweat the small stuff.

bumperella · 04/10/2012 22:20

monkeysbignuts, my 18 mnth old lifts my top to have a giggle at my tummy-button. I don't know why. But it is a Bad Thing. Am not sure GP should be concerned though....

monkeysbignuts · 04/10/2012 22:23

she just said that he would be lifting my top up for a feed when ever where ever and that is a bad thing.
I only made it to his first birthday because he started biting my boobs and boy did it hurt! after 3 nights of him clamping down on my nipple I hung up my breast feeding boots lol, big wimp!

BlueSkySinking · 04/10/2012 23:34

mix feeding means weening in my eyes.

HissyByName · 04/10/2012 23:41

"And my attitude to ff is I don't know how anyone copes with that tbh all that seterlising and make up bottles and having baby cry while they wait for you to warm the milk I could not cope with that 1 bit having to actually get up in the night and not just grab baby and feed em in bed. I really don't know how you all do it."

WTAF? Stop fucking judging woman!

lisaro · 04/10/2012 23:50

Here, OP (passes a grip) I think you need one.
I breast fed foe that long, and didn't feel I needed to be so irrational defensive. I wonder why you do?

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