...to expect people to reply to birthday invitations within a reasonable timescale??

[MaryRose]

It seems to happen every year, I send out the invites for the kids birthday parties a couple of weeks beforehand and here I am five days before the party with only two replies panicking that no one is coming to dd2's birthday. I know people will probably reply at the last minute but it does cause undue stress for me and dd. She says her friends have said they are coming, but really, just a text from the parent to confirm. Am I asking too much or stressing too much and does this happen to others?

Put reply by x date on them when you send them out. I always do and only get the odd message after that.

well admittedly I didn't do that this time but I have in the past and it made no difference really! Problem is there are some new ones this year so I don't even know the mums to collar in the playground, aaahhhhh, stress!!!

I'm worried about this. I've booked a hall 2 weeks after half term for DD's party. I'm giving invitations out the first day back from half term. Is 2 weeks enough time for parents to RSVP? DD has had 2 parties already this term, and I replied within a day to both. Will be watching this thread.

YANBU but i confess to being a bit forgetful myself and often remember at last minute to reply.

I usually give them out about 2 weeks in advance. I'm sure it will all be fine but I could just do without the stress and my DD is such a lovely kid, so loyal to her friends, she would be gutted if no one came for whatever reason. (I have invited a few extra family members just in case!!) Though thinking about it I suppose I have been guilty of 'late replying' myself at busy times!!!!

There have been good ideas on here in the past to help get responses. I like the one where you withhold the actual venue (give vague area), and specifically ask for an RSVP to get the location details.

Or put something like, no response will assume you are not attending.

It is hard though - they are easily lost, get left in trays, stuck under piles of other letters etc. I've been guilty of slow response in the past, but I know it makes it hard for the parents so do try and respond right away so that I don't forget.

I put a RSVP by date on, which usually works. Still remember the mum I had to chase for one of DS's b'days - she said, "Oh, right, I didn't realise I actually had to reply" or the mum who stayed at DS's b'day once, happily accepting tea/cake etc but didn't bring a pressie for DS, who was 5 at the time I don't bear grudges at all, oh, no!

YABU to expect any replies at all ever. Well actually, YANBU, just unrealistic!! It sucks.

YANBU and I get just as frustrated when it happens to me, but I would have to admit that I am often late replying myself for all manner of reasons, such as "I just found this invite in the bottom of DD's bag", or "DH has stuck this invite in the pile of papers on the fridge", or "I'd completely forgotten about this until today", not much advise, but I hope the party goes well for both of you.

Drives me nuts - especially if you are trying to plan and prepare party bags, food etc. I was getting replies up to the day of DD2s party and suddenly the numbers went from 10 confirmed to 18! I think its best to assume most will turn up unless they say otherwise and maybe a gentle reminder to put your mind at rest. I draw the line at someone phoning me 20 mins before the party when I'm on the way to the party venue...oops missed call, didn't hear my phone

Yanbu.

It is a pita though, I have suffered years of that shit.

I did eventually resort to handing invites to parents myself, and waiting whilst they opened then in front of me.

I like the ideA of withholding the address until the rsvp phone call.

Only once did I find a crumpled party invitation in bottom of book bag after the party. O felt so bad, did phone the parent to explain.