Too feel devastated for the wife of the teacher who has run off to France with his 15 year old pupil?

[chipsandmushypeas]

What on earth went through his head when he decided to do this?! The poor woman has taken all her social networks down out of humiliation I presume. link

Crazy.

The law can't be very well enforced in my opinion. Is it one of those laws that is only paid lip service to. It would seem like it from the number of pupil/teacher relationships that lead to marriage and/or longer term relationships.

I may get flamed for this but i also dont think its helpful having teachers that are much older than the 6th formers working in high schools

Assuming that what you meant to say was "I don't think it is helpful having teachers that arent much older...." I'm sorry, but this is a ridiculous comment. How are teachers supposed to enter the profession then? At retirement age? If they promise to put bromide in their breakfast tea? Or what?

I look forwards to seeing your proposals for a non-discriminatory method of applying your solution.

Well if thats true i jope he is sacked for his own good because if i were the dad i would take his head off

And tbh the dad is most likey to have to leave his job as well the gossip and chat wont do him any good and he will be the subject of this for years no doubt some not so nice students will use this aginst him

Viviennemary - it's pretty much down to the school to find out whether something is going on. I think they brush a LOT under the carpet because the scandal if it comes out ends up being huge and lasting for ages. We had teachers who ended up marrying students, and another teacher who constantly made sexual comments. Everyone knew about it, even teachers. But to my knowledge he never actually did anything to anyone. I think a school would have to be confronted with definite proof that sexual contact had happened before they would take the risk of bringing it out into the open. It would have to get to the point where they would be in the shit for NOT dealing with it

dump her this is not a relationship this is an abuse of power once they are found he should not be able to have any contact with her

i am quite sure he is going to try and win his wife back, look how many are saying silly man, what came over him, what was he thinking blah blah blah he will no doubt receive some understanding from some people for his silly actions and thinking he was in love

And some people will say she manipulated him and he couldn't help himself because they always say that

I certainly don't agree with "well it's done now".

It isn't done, it is continuing. And every day he is with her is continuing a crime.

Until the facts come out there is no evidence that they have been having a sexual relationship.

But imo he should be charge with grooming a child, because that is what he has done.

oh yes that's right he could be doing the decent thing and waiting until she is 16

From what I've read, the police have been called to his house many times due to his aggression during arguments, and his neighbours have described him as somebody you wouldn't want around your children.

So no, my greatest concern would not be that he might disappoint the young girl by going back to his wife .

I expect they will be found or give themselves up very shortly. They won't be able to hide out for long. They are in a british numberplated car. In France, with the Gendarme looking for them. Unless, they have gone on to spain or elsewhere which they may well have done since this was friday night they crossed the channel.

I can't see the poor girl returning to that school after this furore.

he could be waiting, but until we know that fact then he really can't be accused of sexual abuse

SuperBOF - I think one must take what the neighbours say with a pinch of salt. Remember what the neighbours said about the schoolteacher in Bristol, who turned out to be a thoroughly decent man, who was not in any way involved in the murder of that young woman. (the name I cannot remember).

There will always be those who wish to dig the dirt even when they don't even know the couple.

No, her whole life has been blown apart by a selfish egomaniac.

That was to the comment about her staying at school, Dog. Yes, I take your point there. But I think the number of police visits is a bit of a red flag.

Seriously though, what is the likelihood of him waiting? If he has justified (to himself) running away with her he has probably justified sleeping with her as well.

Dogs, I don't ever believe what neighbours say to the Daily Mail either. If my neighbours did anything I wouldn't be talking to the newspapers, and nor would most decent people.

And tbh the dad is most likey to have to leave his job as well the gossip and chat wont do him any good

I think it is far too early to start predicting the career prospects of the girl's father. I should think it is much more likely that he will receive support at work. In any case, most of the gossip and chat will occur in the community and that, in itself, is more likely to influence whether the family choose to move away. Not simply the fact that the father is another teacher in the same town.

we all all play the guessing game, (i think they have) but we are not the judge and jury and we don't know the facts.

There's going to be a police confrence later.

Let's just hope that the net closes in soon and this young girl is back with her family and he is in custody where he belongs, in the very near future.

I would be out of my mind with worry if I were her family, and I do have some sympathy for the teacher's wife too. I hope she is being supported.

she is 15. it is illegal to have sex with someone under 16, but it is not 'rape' that he would be charged with, it will be something like 'sexual activity with a minor under 16' or something like that (not sure of the wording). If she was under 13 it would be a charge of 'rape' whether or not she 'consented' as rightly said, a child cannot consent to sex.

If a 15 year old has sex with someone of a similar age, despite this still be illegal, they are unlikely to be prosecuted, depending on the age gap, so for example a 15 and 16yo having sex would unlikely attract prosecution. A 15yo and a 20yo is more likely to, depending on a multitude of facts, and, as is in this case, an adult twice the age of a 15yo would almost certainly be charged with the offence and when found guilty placed on the Sex Offender Register for a period of time (but not necessarily indefinitely).

Also, although he is a sex offender, assuming of course that he has had sex with her, he is not a paedophile, as that is a particular category of child sex offender who has sexual thoughts/acts towards non-pubescent children (under I think it is either 13 or 11). It is a distinction that needs to be made, as despite all the moral issues around what is happening here, in some cultures and societies it is not illegal or unacceptable to have sex with a child aged 15 and younger but in pretty much all societies and cultures, paedophillia is not acceptable.

That is not to say this is not a worrying situation in terms of breach of trust and grooming of a young girl.

I agree with what you say Burlington. What school wants the publicity this school has had. But I think the Head does have a responsibility to act if they think something inappropriate is going on between teachers and pupils. A very difficult situation I agree but it shouldn't be swept under the carpet. And I suppose it is difficult when there is no proof only innuendo or gossip.

Yes there is the fear of wrecking someone's career based on teenage gossip (and teenagers do gossip and exaggerate) balanced against making sure nothing is actually happening.

There was a similar case years ago and the male teacher went to prison. I think it's taken more seriously than an average bloke in his early 20s and a 15yo girl because of the position of authority.

In the case years ago he went to prison for a couple of years, she waited for him and they got married.

this is his blog under his musician name of jeremy ayre

I think there is something wrong, deeply flawed, about a man in his 30s who is interested romantically and sexually with a teenage girl. He must be quite an inadequate person and not like the apparent equality of a relationship with a woman his own age, and need to have that feeling of superiority to an easily impressionable young girl.

Not to say that age gaps are a bad thing - absolutely not - but when the younger person is only 15, imo that is very wrong indeed.