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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that IPads/laptops for younger children are just ridiculous

424 replies

MummyGalore · 17/09/2012 14:19

I don't know if this has been covered before as not on here often so sorry if so.
But AIBU to be getting increasingly riled/concerned with the amount of mums who are talking about getting their children (I'm talking under 10s but some i know are buying them for children as young as 4!!!) Ipads and laptops for christmas. It riles me as i think that they are starving their children of their opportunity to learn through imaginative play. Simple toys are the best at that age, surely ipads are not a good option especially at 4.
What do others think?

OP posts:
Lambethlil · 17/09/2012 20:16

once your son is 4? And has HFA. So he doesn't have any developmental delay but struggles to see how he fits in to the world around him? A colourful, predictable world in his iPad must seeming a godsend, but I would really research how helpful it's use is in the long term.

McPhee · 17/09/2012 20:17

I'm not here to engage in a war, but to state my opinion the same as each and every one of you.

I stand firmly by my beliefs

Children have no place owning their own technology.

Although I do agree with the SN angle. My Nephew is autistic and he benefits massively from computers at his school. But at school is where it stays.

akaemmafrost · 17/09/2012 20:19

Two iPads here. One for me one for dc, dd draws on hers mainly and does the odd reading and numbers games, probably about 20 minutes a day if that.

I can't actually think why my giving my child an iPad is anyone else's business Confused.

onceortwice · 17/09/2012 20:20

Yes, my son is 4. He has HFA and (probably) an array of sensory issues.

His colourful, predictable world has helped in so many ways.

In the long term, if I have to choose whether my son is happy or conforms: I choose HAPPY

onceortwice · 17/09/2012 20:22

McPHee - totally respect your opinion - for you... Please respect mine, for me.

lisad123 · 17/09/2012 20:22

Lamb you have a very limited view on HFA. We all share a iPad and laptop in our house and we do limit time on them, one hour a day only on school day.
My kids are not fat, enjoy plenty of outside activities but find the iPad easiest to use especially as they have muscle problems too.

ReindeersGoldenBollocks · 17/09/2012 20:22

Another thing, DH's father used to work in computing when DH was growing up.

Understanding the formatting capabilities of a computer is complicated in the extreme.

DH spent a lot of time on computers as a result of this, and is very intelligent and has a good understanding of the world around him. He also doesn't work in computing. Failing to see how an iPad is so different tbh.

McPhee · 17/09/2012 20:26

Thank you for your respect Smile

onceortwice · 17/09/2012 20:28

MCPhee Smile

Lambethlil · 17/09/2012 20:29

It's other people's business because we don't live on individual planets.
It's unproven technology and now there's a critical mass of parents who have ok'd it it makes it much harder for parents who have qualms to resist it. not me, we've established I'm geriatric and my dcs used slates

onceortwice · 17/09/2012 20:32

OH well, Lambethlil, You will just have to deal with the fact that I bought my kids IPADS and don't regret it.

I told them there is no such thing as santa either.

We've also put paid to: Tooth fairy, easter bunny, ghosts and feel free to name a few more.

Yeah, I will probably be hated in the playground.

Oh well. Will take the pressure of DS's autism.

Prarieflower · 17/09/2012 20:33

McPhee as I said we don't have them as too pricey even for me when we have a perfectly functioning mini Mac and no spare cash. Now my kids do do all you list(and more) however they also had/have laptop time.If I was rich however they'd have an Ipad each because they're far easier to navigate,they can get the apps/books (and god knows what else),are more transportable so we could curl up on the sofa together with them like we do books,are smaller etc,etc

Tonight my dd 7has had a piano lesson,Brownies, was out on her bike and read a book.

Dtwin 2 (8) had a piano lesson and has played out on his bike with friends,finished reading Ruby Redfort.

As well as all that dtwin 2 had an hour on the laptop.He did some work on the website he's made himself(he's Yosemite obsessed so did some research and put some pics on), he looked for some Harry Potter piano music to buy(looked to see if he had enough pocket money),he e-mailed his grandma,looked at some photos she sent of his cousins and then did his homework on it which they're allowed to now and again(he has perfect handwriting and they do written weekly homework before I'm flamed).

If I was rich the above would simply be on an Ipad.I don't see the difference or the problem.My kids have friends that go on v expensive long haul holidays,Legoland,Disney etc,etc.It's life some people are rich and their kids have more,newer things

DowagersHump · 17/09/2012 20:33

This was our technology enabled day today:

Got up - DS got dressed, had breakfast, we played together on the wii for 10 mins before school
School
Tennis lesson
Hot wheel track building and playing
Dancing round living room to 'viking' (no idea why they're called that) songs on ipod
Dinner
Do maths puzzles on vtech very low tech computer
He read me a story, I read him one
Bed

Exciting isn't it? Can't you just see how technology is rotting his brain!!!?!!

Lambethlil · 17/09/2012 20:35

Yep. It'll help for today. Get some advice from those involved in your son's care; don't see why your 3 year old has got one though.

onceortwice · 17/09/2012 20:39

Because I can, Lambethlil

Funnily enough, his Educational psychologist was AMAZED at his ability on computers and his draft statement actually included bring his ipad to school (which the school are complaining about because the other kids night want to bring one too... Am I complaining because my son doesn't get the playground!!?!???!???!?)

Horses. Courses.

LemonLovesLilac · 17/09/2012 20:43

I have an iPad myself but my six year old uses it under my supervision for interactive educational games and apps! I would not buy him his own but have no problem letting him use it for a limited amount of time, maybe every other day! I prefer him to be outdoors playing, colouring, building Lego, reading books all of which he does the majority of the time. I believe the issue here is to make sure that children get a fully rounded rearing and not have them constantly using one particular thing to entertain themselves!

Makingmama · 17/09/2012 20:43

I would never dream of spending that much money on a child...nevermind one so young! However my parents bought both my dc's their own ipads, for a 4th and 3rd birthday present Shock !!! I do think it's ridiculous that my dc have an ipad each and dh and I have nothing like that Grin

I do limit their time for eg they don't use them on school days (now school has started for us) and will have limited time on weekends. It's a choice of tv time or ipad time here. They do have some great apps eg phonics etc and I think it is very beneficial for them. I would never sit them in a restaurant with one...however they are very useful for travelling and hospital appointments etc.

Oh and my dd is amazing on them (she's now 20 mo!) She can turn it on, find the games she wants to play and play them etc....very odd to see!

Lambethlil · 17/09/2012 20:47

Horses courses indeed.
I hope school comes round and doesnt just use it to 'manage' him. I can see how you can't deny your dd one too.

onceortwice · 17/09/2012 20:47

LEmon - with the best will in the world, he is 6. What do you think she would use it for if you didn't monitor her / supervise her? Is she considering world domination?

My DS would like to be outdoors all the time. Infact, I am sure he has the wherewithall to be quite feral.

I am not sure why the view appears to be: Buy your child an IPAD and they will immediately cease to do anything but play said IPAD.

Can anyone of you say that? About any toy? Because, it's really really not true. And I actually know. Because my children actually do have ipads of their own.

Prarieflower · 17/09/2012 20:49

That is what I do Making it's Dsi/laptop or TV not both.They have their 3 X weekly stint and that's it.But I restrict lots of things and screen time is but a tiny bit of their rearing.Tbh they're all out on their bikes with their friends most nights before/after tea.Im nagging more about that at the moment because they don't want to come in.

onceortwice · 17/09/2012 20:50

If school just manage to 'contain' him, that will be a success.

Chances are, DS will be 'excluded' before he is 5.

ANd, seriously, it has bugger all to do with an IPAD. Just the fact he doesn't get other kids. We are trying, seriously, we are, so don't make this about 'if he'd never had an IPAD'. He just doesn't get other kids (read my other threads).

Sometimes, you just have to go with what works. Sometimes, you just can't beat a square peg into a round hole.

onceortwice · 17/09/2012 20:51

FWIW, school for DD is brilliant. She is loving it.;

nokidshere · 17/09/2012 20:52

I'm very old. I was 34 when the internet exploded into our lives and I had only ever used a computer before then at work - one of those massive things with black screen and green writing (it was just a glorified word processor).

I was given an iPad for my 50th birthday and, if I am honest, I was slightly disappointed and would have been a bit miffed if I had actually paid for it myself. But we love it. Over the past 5 years we have amassed 4 desktop pc's, 2 ipod touch, the iPad, 2 laptops and a plethora of smartphones. My children are 11 and 14 and are totally at ease with it all but the person who spends most time on all of these things is me.

As I said earlier up the thread, I don't and have nver restricted my boys use of anything and they are totally self regulating. Even with all this stuff in the house they are sometimes bored and sit around aimlessley, we have never used technology in the car and they are happy to play "yellow car no return" on long and short journeys. These things weren't available when they were toddlers though but, as i see it, it is no different than regulating the amount of tv or handheld games they used.

I have 35 years experience of looking after under 16 year olds. They haven't changed from 35 years ago particularly. The children I childmind today are a bit more confident than the ones i cared for many years ago but I cant see anything bad about that. They also haven't changed in the way that they play. They still race around laughing uproarasly about bodily functions, compare notes about who has the best "wheels" or who can climb the highest trees. They still fight, tell tales, play with boxes and all the other stuff that we traditionally did as children. They just happen to be pretty good at the technological stuff that is part of their everyday lives now.

akaemmafrost · 17/09/2012 20:54

I'm unconvinced by your argument Lambeth I still think my parenting choices are none of your business, honestly not trying to be offensive but it's what I think.

Makingmama · 17/09/2012 20:55

And actually when I say I would never dream of buying them ipads - I would buy them if I was wealthy and the £ was no issue.

Prarie we do our very active daily lives as normal, day trips, park etc as you and the ipads are a very small portion of their time. They are brilliant for keeping the dc sat quietly whilst I cook dinner for 20 mins - I do feel guilty using them as a babysitter for that time, but having 3 dc 4 and under and no dh under 6pm they're a god send to get us fed safely Smile