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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that IPads/laptops for younger children are just ridiculous

424 replies

MummyGalore · 17/09/2012 14:19

I don't know if this has been covered before as not on here often so sorry if so.
But AIBU to be getting increasingly riled/concerned with the amount of mums who are talking about getting their children (I'm talking under 10s but some i know are buying them for children as young as 4!!!) Ipads and laptops for christmas. It riles me as i think that they are starving their children of their opportunity to learn through imaginative play. Simple toys are the best at that age, surely ipads are not a good option especially at 4.
What do others think?

OP posts:
spiritual · 19/09/2012 07:06

i am advancing in years, wish i could afford one for meself lol

KTK9 · 19/09/2012 08:03

I know the feeling spiritual - actually I did save up the money for one, but then decided to spend it on a week away somewher hot!! - well I got a deal and it paid for the hotel!!! Ipad? , Holiday?, Ipad?, Holiday?

bluebird68 · 19/09/2012 08:46

of course this is partly about money. If you can afford it then you have the dilemma- buy ipad for my 2 year old or not ? If you can't there's no dilemma, just possibly a slightly sick feeling in your stomach as you start to wonder why you can't provide adequately for your child when it seems all around you have the latest thing and you can't afford more than the basics.

curiousgeorgie · 19/09/2012 09:09

My DD is 23 months and has been playing with my iPad since about 12/13 months.

Due to hip problems she has been very late in walking (only just started really) so she's under consultant care, and he recently evaluated her to see where she is compared to other children (to make sure it's just her hips I think, and nothing cognitive)

He said she is amazing, she can count to thirty, knows all her colours (orange / purple / brown etc, not like puce and turquoise ;)) knows the second level of shapes (oval, hexagon, star, diamond) pretty much every animal and the sounds and the letter they start with. She sings and has an amazing memory for lyrics. There isn't a household object she doesn't know the name of, and her motor skills for doing an intricate puzzle or perhaps a 12 piece puzzle is fantastic.

And I completely think this is because of flash card apps and games on the iPad. They hold her attention so much more than me just holding up flash cards. She sits and selects her folder, goes to an app and does it all herself.

It's been so amazing for her development that I think I'm going to get her one of her own for her 2nd birthday next month.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 19/09/2012 09:11

bluebird, that's what has irritated me about this thread; the supposition that children are somehow disadvantaged if they don't have an iPad when they're 3 (or 2 even!).

They're not.

There is nothing that an iPod offers a pre-schooler (I'm talking specifically about NT children here, I don't know enough about SEN at pre-school age to comment) that cannot be got elsewhere and at less expense.

Dancergirl · 19/09/2012 09:19

curiousgeorgie sorry to shatter your illusions but my oldest dd was very much the same at that age and this was 10 years ago before the age of iPads. I didn't use flash cards either, just through everyday talking/playing/reading.

I do wonder how people who struggle to fill their cars with fuel (£80 FFS) can justify a £300 piece of equipment for a toddler. And it's not just about the money, I don't know why but it makes me feel a bit sad to think of these little children with their own iPads.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 19/09/2012 09:34

Flashcards worked with me apparently (according to my mother) but this was in the 70s, when that kind of thing was all the rage.

Your daughter sounds as bright as a button, georgie; she'd have picked up the same "just through everyday talking/playing/reading," as dancer says.

Ragwort · 19/09/2012 09:43

Dancergril - I so agree with you, how can so many people afford these sorts of gadgets for children?

We constantly get threads going on and on about the cost of living, complaining when a school asks for a £5 donation or similar etc etc yet people seem to think it is totally 'normal' to spend £300/£400 on this sort of thing for a child Hmm.

My own brother is a prime example, he & his family have every gadget going (an ipad each Shock), latest mobile phone etc etc yet he complains he is 'hard up'. Well, he probably is as he has spent all his income and hasn't learned to save Grin.

curiousgeorgie · 19/09/2012 09:49

Dancergirl - I'm sure your child did learn without an iPad, but mine has been helped enormously with it.

I could sit there and say "1, 2, 3...... 30" but she wouldn't be as interested as when she is popping number balloons on the iPad.

Plus, much as we all speak to her and read books with her, the iPad is undoubtedly a piece of amazing independent learning. When I have to cook dinner, be on the phone etc, she's still learning.

I really wouldn't be without it.

curiousgeorgie · 19/09/2012 09:51

And I don't think people find it normal to spend the price of an iPad on a child... But rather than a lot of plastic toys that will last a year or two, why not a more expensive investment for something they will use every single day for years and years, that can change with them and that will also help them with education when the time comes.

PinkPanties · 19/09/2012 09:53

YABU my kids love them, if you have the money why not!
So many of the apps available are educational and they can even watch tv on themGrin

McPhee · 19/09/2012 09:59

I think a lot of you have your heads in the sand.

Wake up!

Let children be children

Back to basics

curiousgeorgie · 19/09/2012 10:01

McPhee - You think letting a child play with an iPad somehow robs them of a childhood??

Ridiculous.

Craftyone · 19/09/2012 10:06

McPhee - I'm with you and as i said before i've worked with many teenagers who have had too much too soon. Unfortunately the parents are always oblivious and think that spending the money = really caring.
I know this is not all parents but as it is mainly a middle-class problem it rarely gets mentioned.

dysfunctionalme · 19/09/2012 10:07

HenriettaPootel I'm kinda with your mum on this one. Reading engages the brain and imagination, and fires language learning. Computer games do nothing to fire imagination or boost vocabulary, and everything to trigger addiction vulnerabilities.

imnotmymum · 19/09/2012 10:08

McPhee ipads are not targeted for adults and is totally different to sexualisation of children that is bonkers. Back to Basics- as I posted you can have tech and books, wii and a football. I think you may have your head in the sand McPhee do your children not use tablets at school?

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 19/09/2012 10:11

Of course she wouldn't be interested in you sitting there and saying "1, 2, 3" georgie! But playing with bricks, counting things as you go about your daily business, weighing ingredients as you bake together, filling jugs with water; that's how children learn.

I'm not saying that iPads are useless, just that they're not essential. They probably have their place, used for very limited periods, but there is nothing an iPad offers that can't be got elsewhere (apols for repeating myself). And I do think there's a risk of people abdicating to them far too much, in which case they are going to have a detrimental impact.

curiousgeorgie · 19/09/2012 10:14

Dysfunctionalme - of course it fires imagination and boosts vocabulary. Have you actually used one??

bluebird68 · 19/09/2012 10:16

jenaimarrheplaysguitar i know. Logically i know DD was not disadvantaged by me not having money to buy the latest thing, she did brilliantly at school and starts at a prestigious uni on a very oversubscribed course next week- i'm on a very low wage and get benefit top ups to help with housing. But as a parent your heart sinks when you have to explain to them that sorry but you can't afford the latest phone/ piece of ICT/ 'educational' foreign holiday. I am fortunate in that i had enough to have a family computer and later a PC for her when she was in secondary school, we can just about afford home broadband . Luckily giving them time and attention and love is free and I can only hope that no more libraries close so that everyone has access to free internet and books, not just at school but outside school hours too.

McPhee · 19/09/2012 10:18

I'm not against them playing with them. Read the thread.

I'm against them being brought for toddlers....that's flipping ridiculous. And yes, they are an adult tool which the childrens toy industry has adopted in order to make you all believe your child will benefit from having one Hmm

I'll bet half of those parents fell in to the toddler milk trap too. It's about marketing, which is why I mentioned the sexulisation of children. That's about bad marketing too. I do wish people would actually read, think and understand why these aren't a good thing.

Dancergirl · 19/09/2012 10:20

Also, why is everything justified by being 'educational'? Be it tv, computer games, iPad etc....as long as its educational that's all right. Children don't need to fill every minute with being educated. What happened to normal, everyday play, or shock horror, not doing anything at all just 'being'? Children need time to daydream, to run a finger down a window, stare into space, trace a pattern on the sofa, just getting absorbed in their own thoughts.

Who remembers that bit in the film Parenthood when the hot-housed child was staring at a little boy spinning round and round and wondered what on earth he was doing? Children need to be children.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 19/09/2012 10:21

do your children not use tablets at school?

At school is for a limited period. The applications are (hopefully) carefully selected to complement all the other tools the teacher is employing.

If none of those aspects apply, then the teacher is letting their pupils down big time.

There are posts on this thread that indicate that some people believe that touch pads are some amazing miracle device that can teach their children almost everything they need to learn. They can't. Suggesting as much is as ridiculous as the marketting for those tapes that were all the rage a few years ago, that promised to teach you to speak Mandarin as you slept.

nokidshere · 19/09/2012 10:21

They aren't essential but they are fun and nice to have if you can afford one. "mine" is ours - the children don't have their own but they do enjoy playing on it.

And no more harmful than watching tv, probably a bit better because you have to interact with it rather than just slob. Surely no-one here is saying that their child sits on it 24/7 and doesn't do anything else. Its just another (albiet expensive) resource.

Dancergirl · 19/09/2012 10:26

Marysbeard but you and other parents can challenge the expectation of the school that 'everyone' has Internet access. Parents don't need to go out and buy expensive equipment to aid their child's learning. Say no to the school, you don't have suitable facilities at home and they have to make provision for the children without. Anything else would be discrimination surely....?

imnotmymum · 19/09/2012 10:31

McPhee I find your tone very patronising and insulted into thinking parents who buy these are not seeing a bigger picture and no one has said that they teach their child everything just an extra tool and a bit of fun in downtime. If it is not the using rather than the buying of what has it got to do with you. The parents earn the money so they an spend it as they wish...and they can still enjoy building dens!!