To think sod you to people who don't like my over enthused parenting

[FrustratedSycamorePants]

I have officially turned into one of those loud over praising parents.

Just went to supermarket with dds, one of whom has a number of additional needs, forgot the mac major an couldn't find the trolley with the seat.

So I did the holding occasionally dragging dd by the hand, with loud over enthused praising every single time she did anything closely loosely resembling what I wanted.

Hanging of the trolley handle stumbling her feet was "well done dd, good walking, good girl, good walking." and similar ad infinitum all the way around the shop.

Aibu to say a mental sod you to anyone who hates the type of parent I have become?

Ps it was a very successful shopping trip and dd rewarded with icecream as zero meltdowns and I haven't been scratched or bitten

YANBU, hope you had an ice cream too, x.

Sounds like an excellent strategy to me.

I think the people who are irritating are the ones who are deliberately showing off about what great parents they are, not the ones who are using praise to encourage children to do something that is quite difficult.

YANBU. I hope anyone that saw you didn't think anything of it-I wouldn't have. You did what you had to do to get the job done. That's what parenting is about.

been there. Yanbu. I'd have poked my tongue out to anyone who gave me 'a look'.
Hope the ice cream was enjoyed!

You sound like you're not too keen on it yourself to be honest...and worrying how you've come across

I find that sort of thing amusing, so you would definitely have brightened my shopping trip and given me something to tell my DH when I got back

well done frustrateds dd!

yanbu

The ones that get the children to work out whether this deal is better than that deal and treat the supermarket shop as an educational experience make me a bit

worra I'm not. I think that's my problem.

I over praise my children, and I don't give a hoot. Who is going to build them up other than me and my DH, the rest of the world just wants to tear you down most of the time.

ah yes... been there done that... (possibly asd child)

shopping trips are successful if I have not been scratched, bitten or he has not throwwn anything that might endanger someone/thing, spat or lashed out at innocent passers by. a lot of the loud over enthused crap gets us through.

YANBU

I do the same with DD3, it means we get the shopping done without tantrums and tears. I can't even bring DD2 into a supermarket though, it's sensory overload; she says she's "allergic" to shops :o

If it's any consolation I wouldn't have paid any attention to how you were looking after your dd as I'm more bothered about getting in and out of a supermarket asap !

It's sod all to do with anyone else how you parent your child so give a mahoosive 'up yours' to any who does pass comment

Over praise away.

tbh if I saw someone doing that, I'd assume there was a reason - it was a plan to improve behaviour or whatever. I wouldn't think you were a twat.

Now if you were doing loud parenting 'look Oliver, Tuscan olive oil? We like the cold pressed best, don't we? Do you remember you liked it so much at our large villa, with view and room for a pool? Do you? Clever boy'

That makes me think about trolley-ankle accidental contact. But your talking - not so bad.

Speak to your kids how you like, just do it quietly.

Now if you were doing loud parenting 'look Oliver, Tuscan olive oil? We like the cold pressed best, don't we? Do you remember you liked it so much at our large villa, with view and room for a pool? Do you? Clever boy'

thats so funny best post have read in ages. OP what you were doing was fine i doubt anyone would comment ... its the volume at which its done that might get you weird looks.

suepurbly I was quite loud. but no mentioning of Tuscan olive oil or villas. I think that would sound like "look blah blah blah like blah blah" to dd.

I think I'm susceptible to noticing imaginary looks after the "get the stick on her" incident last week.

Nobody got my ankles with a trolley - do I take that as a good sign?

Agree with Sue (as always) loud parenting is a bit different.

Taking dd into school last week produced this little gem-

When the kids go in (they are 4) they all have to draw a smiley face in an exercise book as a precursor to writing their name later on.

Little, (lets call him Rufus) Rufus's mother decided that wasn't quite enough for her talented young lad,

"Now came along Rufus draw your face, that's right, make sure the eyes match, carefully carefully, now some ears and I think it needs a neck to join it on to the body, don't you, hmmmmm?"

"Look Rufus, all the other boys are girls can only do silly little drawings, but you can write your name can't you darling? Come on lets show all the other boys and girls what a really clever boy can do, that's right, that's right, just like we do at home, KEEP IT NEAT, and your surname, remember we were learning about surnames and christian names, remember darling......."

Literally had to scrape my jaw off the floor.

That's loud parenting.

gobblers that wasn't me. I'm the "on the paper darling not your feet" loud parent.

Rufus and his Mummy are making me stabby

I don't think loud is the worst. Better loud-nice (as in praising) than being loudly horrible.

I can't stand loud and horrible unless it's to adults swearing "yes Egbert, they are saying naughty words, we don't repeat them do we? It's wrong to say naughty words" otherwise there is no need to belittle other children.

Would it be inappropriate to suggest a metal nail file or keys for stabbing, or a pencil?

I think there is a diffence between loud praising to encourge behaviour and just plain old bragging.

Whatever gets you throught the shop, I say.

Yanbu. Your daughter obviously benefitted from your parenting style today. Well done!

I think your strategy is great but still, honestly, there is no need to do it loudly

It is possible to constantly praise and encourage your child so that they can hear you but the rest of the world can't.

My dd5 ASD, I do that. Good writing, good dressing, goo waiting etc