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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have fallen asleep and not replied

95 replies

Justhadenough · 15/09/2012 22:34

Last night I was sitting here mumsnetting being very productive. All the DCs were in bed. DH had locked the doors and I had told him I would come up in a minute. SIL (DHs sister) text me asking could she come and visit. She visits a lot at night, because she says it's easier for her.
I said no we were all in bed. I then fell asleep on my chair Blush
DH left me where I was. So I didn't wake up till this morning. I had 9 missed calls and 16 messages from SIL most of them telling me to call her back soon.
I rang her back and told her I was sorry, I had fallen asleep.
She said I was rude for doing so and she wanted to come. I said I was sorry, I really didn't mean too. She told me to get lost and she wouldn't ask me again she would ask DH from now on.
I feel really bad now, because she is upset. But at the same time I didn't do it on purpose.
So AIBU?

OP posts:
MinnieBar · 15/09/2012 22:46

Anything past 9.30 is pushing it - 11.20 is waaaay out.

Where's your DH in all of this?!

Original poster
Justhadenough · 15/09/2012 22:47

Dh left me because he said I looked happy (though I think it's because I get grumpy with him if he wakes me up)

OP posts:
BigRedCheeks · 15/09/2012 22:47

I can't imagine anyone turning up here to this time,am sitting in bed in old pj bottoms and a nursing vest!

ratbagcatbag · 15/09/2012 22:48

If your DH is anything like mine sebwont get much joy, when he's in he never responds to texts as his phone gets left of the side and forgotton. Equally if your DH says yes he can stay up and entertain.

BigRedCheeks · 15/09/2012 22:48

At this time I mean. Oh how Saturday nights have changed Grin

GoldenSeptember · 15/09/2012 22:49

Is this a joke? I can't imagine how anyone would think it's ok to do what your SIL did. Confused

Why would you put up with that kind of behaviour?

Original poster
Justhadenough · 15/09/2012 22:49

DH thinks she is being stupid, and he hasn't responded to her.

OP posts:
TalkinPeace2 · 15/09/2012 22:50

NOBODY should EVER expect another person to stay up for them
and WTF is she doing turning up at your house at 11pm.
OUtrageous.
Start turning your phone off more IMHO

BigRedCheeks · 15/09/2012 22:50

Hasn't she got a life of her own op?

TramadolJacket · 15/09/2012 22:51

Sorry, massive x post.

I assumed she was a lot younger with no dcs! Am now Confused that she thinks you're out of order for not answering the phone at 11.20. She sounds like a cheeky cow.

Original poster
Justhadenough · 15/09/2012 22:51

Yes ratbagcatbag My Dh is the same, he forgets his phone often.

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 15/09/2012 22:51

I can't imagine what the SIL is doing to make the OP feel like she's the one who should be apologising Golden.

Pozzled · 15/09/2012 22:54

It is seriously weird of her to expect to come round so late, and to call/text so many times. I'd actually be quite concerned about why she is doing this- is she trying to escape something at home?

Original poster
Justhadenough · 15/09/2012 22:54

I have no idea why I put up with it, mainly because sometimes it easier tahn having to listen to her have a go. I think I feel bad because we don't see her often.

OP posts:
ChasedByBees · 15/09/2012 22:55

She's being ridiculous and you certainly shouldn't have apologised! She owes you an apology but it doesn't seem like she sees it that way.

whethergirl · 15/09/2012 22:55

"She told me to get lost and she wouldn't ask me again she would ask DH from now on." I would consider that a blessing, at least you don't have to deal with her from now on. Problem solved.

OTTMummA · 15/09/2012 23:00

Does she have MH issues op, as i simply can not understand in any way why an adult would think it ok to pop over to someones house at that time of night,, unless invited of course.
And to be so rude? whats her beef?

BigRedCheeks · 15/09/2012 23:01

Yes do tell!

EverybodysDoeEyed · 15/09/2012 23:01

Surely your dh will either be asleep or respond with 'sorry but I've got work in the morning'

Or does she think he's your keeper?

I would be very unhappy at someone turning up that late. You need to lay some ground rules!!

Smellslikecatspee · 15/09/2012 23:02

WTF, I mean really?

I'm Irish in general we do tend to keep later hours, I think nothing of calling one of the sibs back home after 10 /10:30 for a natter.

But even my best friend over here, if I had something to tell her after 10 I'd text first and if I got no reply unless it was a matter of life/death I'd wait.

I would never expect anyone to wait up for me, as for the don't work??? You have DCs how old are they? You're a SAHM? That's a job.

Original poster
Justhadenough · 15/09/2012 23:03

She has no MH issues as far as I know. She has always been very dramatic and can get upset when things don't go her way.

OP posts:
Teeb · 15/09/2012 23:03

Yanbu, she sounds mental and a bit intimidating.

When you say she waits until the kids are in bed, what do you mean? Does she leave them alone to pop into visit in the middle of the night?

Original poster
Justhadenough · 15/09/2012 23:05

My DCs are 10, 7 , 5 and I have triplet DSs age 3 months two are with us and one is in hospital.

OP posts:
anonacfr · 15/09/2012 23:05

That's what I was wondering. Who looks after her children? And doesn't she have to wake up early-ish the next morning?
WHO DOES THAT?

Original poster
Justhadenough · 15/09/2012 23:07

She puts her Dcs to bed and leaves them with her DH. Her DSs are 9,7 and 4 and they put themselves to sleep so they go to bed when they like.

OP posts: