To be getting a bit sick of my friend asking me for childcare?

[NCForNow]

She's my lovely and good friend of more than 20 years but she's annoying me regarding her DD.

She has a part time job which involves travelling to another city once or twice a month...he DP also works but full time. She has been regularly asking me to care for her DD who is 2. The DP drops the little girl off on his way to the office when my mate is away and she then picks him up as she gets arrives home a few hours later.

It's because she's found it hard to get regular childcare on such a part time basis...I don't feel that I can say no because I work from home and it's not THAT often.

Her DD isn't easy...she's not a nightmare but at 2 she's into everything and my morning has gone when I have her.

She spoke about getting him into nursery and then she said "I dont want to because in another 3 months i will be on maternity leave (she's having twins!) and I can do it myself then...I'd rather save the money.

I am starting to feel like she's taking the mick a bit...she does ask if I can do it but it's always when I am off guard....she also has some other friends that she relies on for these odd days.

AIBU to say that this time is the last as I have too much work on?

I am a sahm, and am not available at all for regular child care. I absolutely don't mind helping out now and then, but regularly, so that my friends can make money, I don't think so. No one asks now as I made it fairly clear that I don't do regular child care. I see others who take kids home from school, feed them a couple of times a week, then there's a deadline and they need more, it's a sure way to feel resentful.

Just explain that you no longer wish to have her DD because you have your work/stuff to do and that she needs to make alternative arrangements. And work on your assertiveness!

YANBU. Just say no. I had a friend who wanted me to have her DD regularly whilst my eldest was at nursery and my youngest was asleep. The little girl was 3 at the time and very full on. I said no as it was the only time I had some peace and quiet and a chance to catch up. She was a bit about it as I was a SAHM at the time and some people seem to see this as meaning you are their unpaid childcare. I suggested she ask childminders as they will sometimes to ad hoc sessions and that worked well.

IME, regular child care arrangements between friends don't work and for that reason I always pay for childcare, saving friends goodwill for emergencies. If you are both benefiting equally it's OK but there are a load of problems it can turf up; feeling its one sided, different ideas about parenting, one person slagging off someone elses child. Its also a huge responsibility. When I was a SAHM I stupidly agreed to have someones child after school a few times a week. I was rail roaded into it by a very pushy mother who was no more than an aquaintance. I got nothing out of the arrangement and learnt from then to say no. I also have a friend who's child has been over for sleep overs on about 3 occassions so they can go out and has never returned the favour. I wont be doing that anymore. Sounds miserly of me but I think it can cause so many issues its just not worthwhile. I am always happy to help in emergencies though.