To Think Mums are Discriminated Against when Job Hunting?

[TheLazyGirlBlog]

Am ranting slightly (and DP raised his eyes to the heavens so bear with me ladies).

I am trying to get a job at the moment after 5 years out due to DCs. My DP is self employed and we could do with an extra income.

I didn't in anyway think I could just apply and get a job straight away, I'm not daft, there's a recession etc (please don't flame me). However, I've applied for at least 50 jobs across about 5 towns and have got not one reply in 2 months.

Prior to having my DD 5 years ago, I'd worked solidly in retail from the age of 14 onwards. I did both a Retail management and Health and Safety courses a year before getting pregnant and was working as an assistant manager.

When DD was 11 months old, I got PG again (accident but was told I wouldn't get PG again due to internal issues), and had my DS at 28 weeks. He has had all sorts of illnesses, hence the long time out. However, I've run my websites with teams, worked with brands and PRs in that time so not just sat on my arse watching TV all day (as I assume these managers think).

I have tried everything, and not had one email back even to say thanks but no thanks. I cant see it would be my previous employment as going back to same thing (wanted to work in PR, got nowhere with that either). So now think its the 5 years out of work.

It feels like discrimination, as I've spoken to other Mums in the same position. Companies wouldn't be allowed to discriminate against any other social group but they do it to Mums returning to work all the time. My niece is 17, never had a job and got one straight away.Feel like a failure.

Tips?

I was unfairly dismissed while on maternity leave. I went to an employment law firm and started a grievance.

Part of the process was me being seen to be actively looking for work, but the advice was not to actually find a job as this means the award, if given, will be significantly higher. I asked my solicitor how I would achieve this. He told me to put that I was a mum returning from maternity leave at the top of my CV and no-one would ever employ me.

It turned out to be (unintentionally) brilliant advice. The day after I'd settled, a very large sum, with the previous company, the company I work for now got in touch. My new boss had 3 kids and was very flexible with my work hours fitting round my life rather than the other way about.

YANBU

I've never been asked those questions on a job application form . That doesn't sound right at all.

The company I used to work for trained interviewers to not even ask that standard 'ice breaking while walking to the interview room' question "Did you find us ok?". Because if the candidate then revealed s/he'd driven from 50 miles away, you may - consciously or unconsciously - discriminate in favour of a candidate who lived 2 minutes away.

That wasn't public sector, by the way.

If you were doing things in the intervening time you need to spin that.

For instance, I am currently at home looking after my DS, but I do freelance work during his naps and in the evening (largely unpaid at the moment)

Should I write my CV for a job in the future I will be CTO of my own company (which I technically am) - no mention will be made of this at all, and if they ask I shall tell them that it didn't work out to be profitable enough, or I was lonely working alone or similar truth.

Employers say they want X and Y, but when it comes to doing the job (in my experience) the day to day work actually requires very little in comparison to their job specs.

Childcare was spoken about at my interview but in relation to start dates and hours, not in a discriminatory way. In order for them to be flexible with my hours they had to discuss the arrangements I was going to make.

Dappyhays, they shouldn't have done that in an interview, that info can be exchanged after the job offer.

Sorry you're having a hard time OP, hope you get something soon.

I agree Dozer - I would find a way to avoid any such questions until after the contracts are signed.

In my job I've had to deal with relocations, which means that sometimes I have to find a way to let the person interviewing that it's fine to ask about family(or single, or any other type) of life out where they'd be working so I can show them relevant things when they visit, and they can make an informed decision - but it's a very, very difficult line to dance around.

I have been quizzed about childcare arrangements at interviews, as I mentioned previously, to the extent where they've asked me if I've got a childminder or am using a family member, and when I've said a childminder they've said what will happen if your child is ill, what will you do then, that kind of thing. I've been asked directly if I have children, then asked their ages, what schools they go to, how will I do school drop offs etc.

I'm still at the same job 3 years later, have had substantial pay increases in that time, and I'm happy. Even though strictly it shouldn't have been discussed, it caused me no problems and helped me negotiate hours that suited me better than the standard that was being offered. I believe I was treated with positive discrimination.

very I wouldn't get engaged in that conversation at all. I would just calmly state that I have childcare arrangements in place, they have been in place for x years successfully and that this arrangement has allowed me to achieve xxxx professionally, bringing the conversation back round to the interview and my strengths for the job I'm being interviewed for.

Whilst the question of child care shouldn't come up sometimes it does a classic is "how do you feel about traveling/overnight stays? They are almost certainly getting at your domestic arrangements and so answering it in a way that alleviates any concerns they might have about you being unable to fulfil that aspect of the role does, I believe, work better than an anodyne "it's no problem" because 95% of the time they will be imagining the worst.

So say "that is no problem I have a great nanny/ flexible childminder/ my mother takes care of the kids so I'm able to start early/ stay late" etc

stillsquiffy completely agree about the % of applications from people who don't know how they are coming across and those whose initial contact in the form of covering note makes all the difference. A cv/form is generally just part of the assessment and tailoring it as other posters have said is vital; more so than marital status etc. My oft repeated maxim is make it easy for the reader to decide to invest their time in meeting you. Straightforward, relevant and clear. Same applies to interviews.

I really think I've had some shit interviewers! I have just remembered too an interview where I was asked if I was planning anymore children.

Not read the whole thread but my manager ignores CVs from anyone he suspects might be a mother 'because they'll refuse to do overtime' no matter how qualified they might be.
He's not open about it and certainly would deny his comments to HR but it means the few mothers we have are those who were childless when they started.

Veryfrustratedandfedup - sorry you've had such a crap time, hope you get interviewed by someone decent, soon!

Thank you iggi :)