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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu -father wants me to commit fraud!!?

186 replies

pumpkinsweetie · 25/08/2012 23:32

As some of you may know, my father is also my landlord. Boiler was serviced 4 days ago and then condemned. We have been without heating and hot water for over a week due to boiler being declared dangerous by gas meter engineer.
Landlord/df came over yesterday, promised to fit an immersion and get me electric radiators until he has the money to complete it (apparently £4000). So fine and dandy thought atleast we were getting somewhere (sigh)..........until today: he has rung me and asked me to pretend i own the house so i can get a grant for the boiler!!

Wtaf: my own df is now expecting ME to commit fraud to save his own neck. Mentioned immersion to him, he said maybe monday, maybe tues.

Even if i went ahead with this crazed idea, it will not work as im not in receipt of any of the benefits needed to get one!

I obviously said to him i will be found out, he said "no you won't they won't look into who owns the house"?!!- knowing full well i recieve an amount of hb, of course they will know my name and address and know im RENTING
Wwyd

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pumpkinsweetie · 26/08/2012 09:31

Going to wait until tues, when he probably still hasn't put immersion in and then get down to the council to be put back on the list, giving reasons why. Then just hope we are put very near the top

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RubixCube · 26/08/2012 09:33

I'd go with TheAmerdillos advice as your dbil said the same a few days back xx

HecateHarshPants · 26/08/2012 09:35

rubix - are you related to pumpkin?

RubixCube · 26/08/2012 09:36

Yes.I'm her sister Smile Long time poster

pumpkinsweetie · 26/08/2012 09:37

Exactly rubix i will have to go down to the council if it ends up in him being proscecuted so be it, like pp say he doesn't care about me going to prison, which in effect would leave my dcs with no parentsSad

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fergoose · 26/08/2012 09:37

and you are going to report him aren't you? - a dodgy boiler could have killed you aside from the fact you have no hot water still. And I wouldn't pay him any rent until he sorts it out, but then that may be making yourself voluntarily homeless so I would suggest you contact Shelter for free advice first.

HecateHarshPants · 26/08/2012 09:39

Then maybe you can talk some sense into her! Grin She needs to forget any idea of loyalty to him. doesn't she? And just take care of herself and her child.

pumpkinsweetie · 26/08/2012 09:39

If i get myself put back on the housing list, would that be making myself homeless?

Im going to pay normal rent so as not to be making myself 'voluntary' homeless iyswim

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pumpkinsweetie · 26/08/2012 09:41

Its worse as its isnt just one child, i have 4dc-so having no hot water or heat is a huge problem. 20 kettles later, their shallow bath is still not even lukewarm and the weather is turning too

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fergoose · 26/08/2012 09:42

Putting yourself on the housing list doesn't make you homeless does it.

Why aren't you reporting him to the council - that would make you higher up the list living in an uninhabitable property wouldn't it, otherwise I don't think you would have much success at all on a housing list

Again - you need to contact Shelter and you need to report him

RubixCube · 26/08/2012 09:42

He didn't care for us when younger so always knew he wouldn't change tbh.His told me he doesn't need to give us money now we are older as he spent enough of us when younger.This man gave 10pound in maitence for3 3kids.Thats all we had of him

HecateHarshPants · 26/08/2012 09:42

No, Anyone can go on a waiting list. That's not anything. It is your circumstances that decide how far up on the list you are. Being on the list has nothing to do with being homeless.

Unless you are homeless of course Grin

If your dad evicts you, or if the house is declared unfit for you to live in - then you'll be a high priority.

Go to them. Get on the lists. It's better to be on than not.

pumpkinsweetie · 26/08/2012 09:43

Would he know i have reported him or could i do it ammonisly so he don't know who out of my friends/family did it?

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fergoose · 26/08/2012 09:44

And you have been living with an illegal unsafe boiler for how long (years) and he has put all of your lives at risk and you are not going to report him to the authorities? Does he treat other tenants in this way - he should be in prison.

HecateHarshPants · 26/08/2012 09:44

x-post. 4 children and no heat or hot water and a landlord that doesn't give a shit?

Report him.

You cannot carry on like this.

This man gives not one shiny shit about any of you.

RubixCube · 26/08/2012 09:45

Oh i've tried believe me but my sis is extremely loyal to him which he doesn't deserve

fergoose · 26/08/2012 09:45

You seem more concerned about upsetting him than doing the right thing - this man has risked yours and your children's lives and you are worried about him finding out you have reported him!!

The plumber could have reported him I guess - but tough, I would tell him that you have reported him as he has broken the law and put you at risk. Why should you feel bad for that?

0lympia · 26/08/2012 09:46

I would say no. don't get into a justification of why you won't, your reasons etc... he wouldn't ask any other tennant to do that.

RubixCube · 26/08/2012 09:46

I'd report him.I think your scared of her.I think if she wasn't on the scene you would.

fergoose · 26/08/2012 09:47

But this isn't about your sister, this about your landlord who is acting illegally and risking lives.

MissKeithLemon · 26/08/2012 09:47

Pumpkin Check out this link. It is possible your dad has referred to the Warm Front Grant. Its available to anyone in receipt of certain benefits, and you/your DF could claim without breaking any rules. It doesn't matter if the landlord is your dad.www.direct.gov.uk/en/Environmentandgreenerliving/Energyandwatersaving/Energygrants/DG_10018661

It sound too good to be true, at least I thought so when I first heard about it, but I had a new boiler, cavity wall insulation & loft insulation all put in for free and I own my own house! At the time I received tax credits and this was a qualifying benefit.

Have a look and see as it sounds like you do qualify - and no lying wil be necessary at all Grin

fergoose · 26/08/2012 09:49

They have changed the rules regarding free central heating, you used to be able to get it on just working tax credit, but now since April you need the disability element or other benefits, so on that basis you won't qualify.

HecateHarshPants · 26/08/2012 09:52

Who cares if he knows it's you?

Yes, he'll know it's you. Don't start worrying about him. He doesn't give a shit about you.

And if you think he will be violent, report that too.

I understand if you want to somehow save this relationship and it's hard to truly accept that the person who fathered you is not a father to you, but that's the reality of it and as soon as you can accept that, it will be easier to focus on what is best for your children and not what's best for him.

pumpkinsweetie · 26/08/2012 09:53

Rubix-him and his wife would both be done as they are both on the agreement.
The intial uproar will it subside in due course?
Tbh my life will be easier if i do it but the major fall out will last a while i should imagine. Im loyal to him to a certain degree but is waining now due to my living circumstancesSad

Im going to tell him tues what my plans are in the hope he gets shifted if not then i will tell the council all so as to get re-homed

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pumpkinsweetie · 26/08/2012 09:56

Warnfront- I don't get any of those benefits needed and neither does my father so thats no good unfortunetly

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