To ask you all if the withdrawal method works?

[Tizzylizzy]

My period is a couple a days late...don't think I am pregnant but I was just wondering if anyone else relies solely on this form of contraception, and how effective it's been over the years? It's never failed me yet...

What SOH said is spot on. Interesting how many people have linked to actual statistics proving the reliability of it as a contraceptive but some people are stil saying how stupid everyone is for doing it. It's not acceptable contraceptive for new partners or for 15 year olds boys who spunk their pants when they see a boob, but presuming your partners aren't total minute men it really is a reasonable method.

My DH, for the first little while after our DC was born and he was struggling with the shock of having a baby, insisted on three forms of contraception: condoms, the pill AND total abstinence

We used withdrawal for a couple of years after dd was born and whilst dh was waiting to getting around to getting the snip. I found it incredibly stressful and as a result it had a very negative effect on our sex life.

We have used this method for over 20 years now
no accidents both dc planned . Like others have said though
wouldn't use this method if we were dead set against
having any more dc .

It would ruin sex for me. I wouldn't want him pulling out at the opportune moment, and how can you let yourself go if you are constantly waiting for him to yank it out? Sounds rubbish. But I'd always rather orgasm during penetration than foreplay so I'd find it very unsatisfying to have to finish after he pulled out.

Well, quality of sex is a rather subjective thing, innit? So sweeping statements to the nature "sex must be dire with withdrawal" are not very appropriate. I can understand that for some people it would not work, but for others there is no demise of pleasure detected.

It works for some people. All the contraception methods have a rate of failure, but withdrawal is much harder to follow than other, it's not just pulling out, but also the dates, etc.

I know women who got pregnant using the pill, condoms, etc.

It's a matter of luck to me, unless you decide to use abstinence, that is the only safe method.

We used this between the DDs for six months, then conceived DD2 two months after deciding to try again.

After DD2 I went back on the pill, but it doesn't seem to agree with me anymore. DH doesn't like condoms. So we've been using withdrawal now for 18mths. DH doesn't want anymore DCs so is, er, religious about pulling out in time. It doesn't ruin sex for either of us.

However, another child would not be the end of the world.

We use condoms and withdrawl. Seems like an extra risk no to. Of there were an issue with condom it would still reduce the likelihood of pregnancy.
I just wonder what starts people off using simply the withdrawl? Is it not minding that much if you do get pregnant?

I definitely wouldn't. For me, it would ruin sex. I would worry. I think I'd be the same even if we used NFP, I'd still worry (I've been told I don't ovulate in the normal way, although it was never actually investigated). So neither method would be good for me or our sex life.

We've been together nearly 10 years, only ever used condoms, no unplanned pregnancies (conceived very quickly when we stopped both times though). Only one split condom in all that time (we decided against MAP as a pregnancy wouldn't have been terrible - in fact we first TTC very soon after that). It's just a case of finding the right method for you I guess. I don't want to use condoms forever but I am unsure what to choose instead at the moment so we are just going to continue as we are for now.

I use it but combined with Persona. Never been pregnant

Well the verdict is officially in. It doesn't bloody work. I'm pregnant! I can't actually believe it! Very shocked but delighted.

Ah excellent

Oh lol, that gives us the answer then
Congrats op!

Congratulations!
And will you be using this particular method of contraception again?

Congratulations-can't help smiling at my laptop for you.

congratulations.

you now have 9 months to research contraception methods lol

congratulations!

I use it. The reason being I don't like hormonal contraception or condoms particularly. However I have only used this method since I've thought it wouldn't be a particularly bad thing if we got pregnant. Although its not 100%, I haven't got pregnant yet. I'm also very aware of my body and when I am supposed to be ovulating and although this is by no means necesarily accurate, it has worked for us so far. We've been doing things this way since July 2010 (when my depo ran out)...or maybe it was 2009.

And just seen the last page. Congratulations op!

Congratulations OP.

One additional fact - withdrawal is not Vatican approved, in fact it is specifically condemned in the Bible as the Sin Of Onan (whom God killed for it).

The sin of Onan was not the withdrawal method, but that Onan, as a brother of the now dead Er, was not doing his duty by Tamar and giving her a son in the name of his brother/her husband and instead was just taking advantage of her.

"9 But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his. So whenever he went in to his brother's wife he would waste the semen on the ground, so as not to give offspring to his brother. 10 And what he did was wicked in the sight of the Lord, and he put him to death also."

Congratulations. Verdict is most definitely in (or will be in 40 weeks).

I guess so - his sin was using contraception at all when he was specifically obligated to procreate - it just so happened that the method he was using was withdrawal. Definitely counts as interfering with God's will though.