to request the following presents for my forthcoming birthday?

[TaggieCampbellBlack]

1. A Nissan Figaro. Brown or blue.

1. Full body laser hair removal. Every bit from eyebrows down.

1. A voucher for a gastric band.

1. A voucher fir a tummy tuck after the band.

1. A breast uplift.

1. Malteasers

1. Some books.

1. Some cava.

1. A diamond.

10. Peace and quiet.

Yanbu

awaits drama

YADNBU

HTH

Do you want these praise you want them yourself, of have you been tricked and pressured into it by a misogynist society?

stirs shit

YANBU. Every crimbo I ask santie for P&Q. I have been a very naughty girl.

YANBU.

But there's a serious danger that you'll just end up with a single small packet of Malteasers

Must look up Nissan figaro, good list.

I don't give two steaming shits for societal pressure. I am entirely fed up with being fat and hairy.

And i am doing it for me innit.

I'm still waiting for my bloody pony!

Never mind the cava. I want champagne and diamonds. (Cue tantrum like girl who wanted a squirrel in Charlie and the chocolate factory.)

I am having a figaro next spring. I am bloody determined. Bollocks to practical. Fuck convention.

Good. because I have stolen your list

Actually having cava now. Could strike that off list.