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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Boys playing with toy guns

127 replies

Ouluckyduck · 15/08/2012 14:42

harmless or not? What rules apply in your house? Will you even allow them, if not, why not, what are your concerns?

Six year old ds loves guns and playing cowboys, and I struggle to see the harm. Interestingly the people I mix with in the uk don't seem yo mind, but back home in Germany people are horrified.

OP posts:
crazygracieuk · 15/08/2012 14:45

My almost 6 year old lives them too. His collection includes Nerf guns, water pistols and Poundland.

As long as your child can play gun games "nicely" then it's harmless in my opinion.

solidgoldbrass · 15/08/2012 14:46

Banning toy guns is a sure indicator of a thick, wanky, privileged parent. Children develop their imagination by playing pretend games, which is going to include pretending good/bad characters.

RightsaidFreud · 15/08/2012 14:46

If i had a boy, I wouldn't mind.

My OH was totally banned from having guns and those kind of toys when he was young, his mother was horrified by them. When he became a teenager, he went a bit mad with paintballing and playing shooting games on the xbox, i guess because it had been a no go thing for him.

So if mothers do ban them be warned, they may turn into a paint-balling fanatic when older!

BatCave · 15/08/2012 14:46

I don't like it, probably because, for me guns = violence. And I'd like to shield my children from that at such a young age. Can't keep them in a bubble though so I'll probably just going to have to get over it! But I won't be buying toy guns. Each to their own though.

crazygracieuk · 15/08/2012 14:47

My son plays pirates or armies with his guns.

WorraLiberty · 15/08/2012 14:48

I played with them when I was little (as did my 4 siblings)

My kids played with them

If we didn't have guns to play with (ie in school) we'd use our fingers as guns when playing cops n' robbers.

I don't see a problem and I certainly don't connect it to any kind of crime statistics.

SomeOldChat · 15/08/2012 14:48

Was horrified at the idea with DS1 (now 11) and we never bought him toy replicas. The only gun we bought him was a space ray gun.

However, over the years, he seems to have accumulated them Hmm. Think they are from his cousins and other friends who 'gifted' them. He still does not have any that look like replica guns, but he does have 3 nerfs, which he has bought himself or has received as presents. His younger brother (7) has a nerf, DS3 (5) does not own any but obviously has access to his brothers' toys.

Needless to say I am less horrified by the idea of toy guns/light sabres, etc, but do encourage (and they do play) other things. Also they are not allowed to point them at anyone who is not fully co-operating and participating in the game.

Finally, they are only allowed to play with them in our garden. They cannot take them outside or on shopping trips, school payground etc.

honeytea · 15/08/2012 14:48

I wouldn't give a boy or girl a gun as a toy unless they especially asked for it.

Very sexist IMO to ask if it's ok for boys to play with guns.

BatCave · 15/08/2012 14:49

Oh I might add my children are a LOT younger so my opinion might change.

Interesting thought though, if it were your daughters in question would it be any different?

SavageGarden · 15/08/2012 14:49

My male and female children play with guns. They're just toys. In the same way when they watch TV and see someone die, they know that the people are just play acting and the baddies are called baddies for a reason. They know this too when playing with toy guns.

They are also aware how very wrong real violence is. Children aren't stupid and understand everthing if you speak to them in a way appropriate to their ages.

MissFaversam · 15/08/2012 14:50

Toy guns are fine its the real ones you gotta be careful of Grin

PeggyCarter · 15/08/2012 14:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MadgeHarvey · 15/08/2012 14:52

Yes. We tried the 'no guns' approach. I believe it lasted less than ten minutes as DS made a gun from a piece of bread. Grin. Gave in sharpish and he continued to love guns until he grew out of it, which they do. There is a certain type of parent that really love all this banning stuff though - it never works!

Callisto · 15/08/2012 14:54

I don't like to see any children playing with toy guns. Whether it's a girl or a boy is irrelevant.

Solidgodbrass - seeing a child playing with a gun is the sign of a dumbarse parent who doesn't give a shit about how they bring up their child. Hmm

MaMattoo · 15/08/2012 14:55

Nope! No guns. Till you don't know what they mean and what they can do, no. And it's not a boy girl thing. I might be a wanky privileged mother but am sure imaginative play could be a lot many things. Being the recipient of an automatic gun (AK47) being shoved in my face to be asked questions by a trigger happy army man many years ago was the basis of this decision. Every bullet can kill someone who has been lovingly brought up by someone. This can be made clear later.
Would imaginative play with blunt knives and pretend stabbing be as much of an issue to non wanky parents? Just a question..don't want to start a fight here (and I know it's easy on MN) but just a thought...

PenisVanLesbian · 15/08/2012 14:59

And the aibu is?

SirEdmundFrillary · 15/08/2012 15:01

I have absolutely no idea. I had a toy gun as a small girl, which I'd asked for because my friend had one and my mum got me one, but I don't particularly like seeing kids playing with them, no.

Champneys · 15/08/2012 15:04

completely harmless.

Never had an issue growing up playing with toy guns with my siblings and friends, and my dc have all had the lot, pistols, machine guns, BB guns the lot.

Ridiculous to think otherwise tbh.
Go down that route and you'll be panicking about every last thing.

Champneys · 15/08/2012 15:05

Oh and I know exactly the kids who are not allowed guns at home, because when they come round ours, they won't play with anything else.
So you'll have to police their friends too.

Not worth it.

WorraLiberty · 15/08/2012 15:06

MadgeHarvey You've just reminded me of toast crust guns Grin

Spammertime · 15/08/2012 15:07

My rule is guns are fine but they shouldn't point them at people.

And yes of course I know they'll point them at each other... but to me it brings in an element of them not being nice things (!) and a bit like swearing, just because I know they'll do it when I'm not around doesn't mean I want them to do it when I am IYSWIM.

bobbledunk · 15/08/2012 15:11

I used to love playing with toy guns and swords as a kid, it's not just a boy thing. It's great for kids to play running about and using their imagination. Banning fun stuff only makes kids want to do it more, I feel sorry for kids with parents who ban everything. Let them be and ignore the crazy Germans.

mayaswell · 15/08/2012 15:11

My friends son banned guns, he made them out of Lego, twigs, plasticine and even paper. When she asked him what he'd made he quickly learned to say magic wand.

Guns don't kill people, people kill people. The gun, the knife, the catapult, the bow and arrow are just the tools.

Rhubarbgarden · 15/08/2012 15:12

My 2 year old dd has water pistols. Her grandmother bought her them. I grew up playing cowboys with plastic guns (fairly realistic ones if I remember correctly - it was the 1970s). I grew up to become... a gardener.

Completely harmless.

mayaswell · 15/08/2012 15:12

My friend banned her son from having guns! Durrr.