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AIBU?

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Original poster

Miriam Stoppard is an idiot who should not be allowed to spout this rubbish about bf

318 replies

50shadesofslapntickle · 14/08/2012 17:57

Some of my La Leche League friends have just shown me this and I am totally surprised that this supposed 'doctor' can spout this crap in a national newspaper?!

www.mirror.co.uk/lifestyle/health/when-should-you-stop-breast-feeding-1259599

And then we discover she has links to Nestle... what a surprise...

boycottnestle.blogspot.co.uk/2008/02/nestle-panic-miriam-stoppard.html

Miriam Stoppard you should be ashamed of yourself for writing this totally innacurate rubbish.

OP posts:
Faverolles · 15/08/2012 15:09

Crinkle77 - the article isn't really saying breast is best though, is it?
It's churning out the "breast is best", whilst highlighting so many bollocks pitfalls - all of which are either plain wrong, or simply her old-fashioned opinion.

Lovebunny, I can quite see why piglet was upset at you describing 6 months as a piddling amount. How dismissive and rude! Plenty of women have battled against the odds to continue breastfeeding, fair enough, if better support was available, fewer would struggle, but to many, getting to 6 months represents a huge amount of effort and dedication, for which they should be congratulated, not told it is a piddling short time Hmm

lovebunny · 15/08/2012 15:19

faverolles, think what you like. have a nice afternoon.

CecilyP · 15/08/2012 15:33

How do you measure your success, lovebunny? I have to say that you don't sound very empathetic here, but perhaps you are different in RL. Are you sure 6-8 years is not unusual globally. I mean, why would you? Whereabouts would this be?

I don't think that 6 months is so much a piddling short time, rather than that if you stop BF at 6 months, you would have to put your DC onto formula, rather than proper food that they can chew with all two of their teeth. If BF has been a problem or if you are going back to work, then switching to FF might make sense. OTOH, if BF has been successful and you have no reason to stop, then switching to FF makes absolutely no sense at all.

Original poster
50shadesofslapntickle · 15/08/2012 15:50

Agree with batcave, I think bf for longer is better too and have seen the benefits of a year plus of bf but I'm not saying that to make anyone feel bad, it's just a fact.

OP posts:
CecilyP · 15/08/2012 15:52

What would you say were the benefits you have seen? Other than not having to faff around with bottles.

Original poster
50shadesofslapntickle · 15/08/2012 16:01

cecily - what are the benefits?! Well - it's breaamilk, designed for a baby's growing needs! More antibodies, nutrients, natural milk... The fact that breaamilk soothes gums when teething, less tummy upsets, less likey ro have nasty nappies as easy on the stomach... Helps with colds, minuses asthma, ecxzema etc. Breast milk is better as it's better than any alternatives?! This isn't to say six months of bf isn't great, of course it is and somehow like piglet-mania who is putting so much dedication in Should be extremely proud of herself - so me saying even longer is better is not to take away from apple who do it for six months etc - not at all, it's just saying of course six months is great but a year or even lo get is even better as the baby continues to receive the benefits of breastmilk

OP posts:
Original poster
50shadesofslapntickle · 15/08/2012 16:03

Sorry - bloody phone put so many mistakes in that last post!

OP posts:
pigletmania · 15/08/2012 16:53

oh my goodness lovebunny i cant believe what you are saying, and you are helping vulnerable women to bf Hmm. There is a lovely NCT bf counsellor on the breast and bottlefeeding section who fortunately is not like you, and is very supportive. Thanks for making lots of women feel very bad, I am sorry love bunny but you are no better than MS in a way. No its not a piddling time to bf, its a great achievment for many women, they have given their lo a good start in life, I suggest you read the every bf counts information on the NCT site.

pigletmania · 15/08/2012 16:59

I have an sn dd, my ds had health issues and i had to express my bm and supplement with formula in a bottle. He refused to latch on and would scream and cry at the breast, so it was easier for me to express, i have not got the time to sit on the sofa or lie on the bed all day to establish bf when i have an autistic dd who is very demanding and a dh who works long hours and nobody else to help out with dd. Every day is a struggle to try and express because of this, and i am thankful that 6.5 months later i am still expressing bm for ds., to be told my lovebunny that what i have achieved is not a lot, andf she bf for 4 years. who smug do you sound knovck a woman when she is down. you ashould know that any amount of bf is better than none

drtachyon · 15/08/2012 17:06

No idea whether breastfeeding to 6-8 years is normal globally, but in the society we live in, 6 months is a long time to be breastfeeding.

Plenty of mums don't make it that far. And expressing enough breastmilk to fully feed a baby is very hard work, even if that baby's the only one.

Instead of saying 6 months isn't long enough, it'd be more useful to focus on ways to support mothers who want to breastfeed but are having difficulty doing so. Maybe then, more women would be able to breastfeed for longer.

auntevil · 15/08/2012 17:10

Piglet, good on you - ignore any smug crowers.
After a lump removal, I was told that it would be unlikely that i would be able to bf if I had children, or if I did, only the 1.
I decided not to bf. From the first ante natal class, to any following appt. that I have ever had with any 3 of my DSs where that question has been asked, there has been a sneery look, or a raised eyebrow. Do I care, no, not now (I did at the time) as I know that being a loving, caring parent, that it is sooo much more than just bfing.

midori1999 · 15/08/2012 17:10

I don't think in our society 6 months is a 'piddling amount of time' to BF. I also don't think using that kind of language is pleasant or helpful, because if women think 6 months is a 'piddling amount of time' to breastfeed and to someone struggling to feed a newborn, 6 months will seem like an awfully long time, then they might wonder if it's worth bothering to BF at all. Hmm

Of course, it is worth bothering, any breastfeeding at all is beneficial and I think a woman breastfeeding for any amount of time in our society, with all the obstacles it places in front of women who want to BF is something to be celebrated and applauded.

Of course, it would be great if everyone breastfed for the minimum of two years or until self weaning, but small steps are needed and currently in our society 6 weeks is good going, let alone 6 months.

bb99 · 15/08/2012 17:18

Piglet - I am so sorry you have had problems bfing.

BUT one of the things that stop open and honest discussion about the Bfing debate and stop women bfing is (in my opinion) the GUILT...

People don't give out accurate information to make you feel guilty, but to let women make informed choices. Isn't it great that women are getting more of the information and support they need in order to make informed choices about how they nourish their children? How empowering to know enough to make a choice.

I do/have BF past 6 months. So far luck with dc1 - 16+ years ago there was v. v. little support and I managed 18 months, finally stopped after a lot of family pressure (ill informed pressure, but I had NO access to accurate information and if the family had had their way my dc wouldn't even have had 6 months of bfing) So information has helped me to do better with my 2nd and 3rd dcs.

dc2 fed to 23 months when they lost interest

dc3, going strong at 18 months...

BUT, I feel awful and try not to feed in public as I am so aware of the brow beating of/from women who don't BF. It's fine for women to whip out a bottle and chuck it in a buggy (your choice - I really don't mind) BUT if I whip out my tits chest and stick my rather long and able to walk baby/toddler on my chest for a nibble, people seem to be rather 'yuck, what you doing that for???'

I also am not allowed able to feed in front of my SIL as she stopped feeding hers (to a great drama of guilt and brow beating) at 3 months and it makes HER feel so bad...

Say NO to guilt - know you all did the best you could with the circumstances that life threw at you...

pigletmania · 15/08/2012 17:37

thank you for all the support, yes ideally i would have loved to have fed to 2 years, bf beyond that is not for me. But that comment coming from a bf counsellor was not good at all

pigletmania · 15/08/2012 17:38

and the smug overtones of her post, and negativity surrounding formula. yes we all know its not as good as bm but its an adequate substitute and many babies have survived on it.

pigletmania · 15/08/2012 17:41

thank goodness the lactation consultant i saw was not like that my pnd would have come back. When you are having bf issues and are not finding it easy to get to the 6 month mark is a long way off, and for me expressing beyond that is the same. i take one day at a time, and are thankful that i am feeding ds half myself and half with formula as what i express is noway going to be enough for a growing 6.5 month old

CountBapula · 15/08/2012 18:00

piglet I found expressing incredibly tedious and difficult, so I'm in awe of you - 6.5 months is an amazing achievement Thanks

pigletmania · 15/08/2012 18:07

thanks count it is so hard and trying to fit it around the kids, esecially my autistic dd is so hard

pigletmania · 15/08/2012 18:08

thats why i feel so angry at comments like lovebunnys which are quite dismissive and not at all positive and encouraging

RachelWalsh · 15/08/2012 18:38

Pigletmania you've clearly gone through a lot to get to six months. Great.

Thing is though - everything isn't about you and your individual situation - the original comment wasn't aimed at you, the original topic (Ms being mercenary and giving out misinformation) wasn't about you. It's a shame for you, everyone gets it.

I don't understand why giving accurate information about breastfeeding is always derailed by people saying "stop making ME feel bad". It isn't about you (not aimed at ny one poster) it's about the balance of scientific evidence.

midori1999 · 15/08/2012 18:48

Saying breastfeeding until 6 months is a 'piddling short time' is not giving accurate information about breastfeeding though, is it? It's an opinion and taking the bigger picture into account is potentially damaging to breastfeeding. Ironic, considering this thread is largely about MS's misinformed comments being damaging to breastfeeding. Hmm

Original poster
50shadesofslapntickle · 15/08/2012 19:10

Pigletmania - you really have done massively well, and please don't think that just because I said that more than six months is great too that I think snuggle but that you have done brilliantly - your dedication is amazing, I mean that x

OP posts:
CecilyP · 15/08/2012 19:14

piglet I found expressing incredibly tedious and difficult, so I'm in awe of you - 6.5 months is an amazing achievement

I'd like to second that. If I had had to express, I doubt if I would have lasted more than 6.5 days!

iggi777 · 15/08/2012 19:33

I do think ilovebunny is coming in for a lot of flack over a remark which referred to the fact that MS considered people like her to be basically abusing their children.

MS thinks 6 months is way too long to bf - the poster was saying 6 months is a short amount of time out of a child's potential 'bf life'.

pigletmania · 15/08/2012 19:34

rachel my situation aside saying that 6 months bf is a piddling amount is not a helpful comment in general and is quite negative to those women who do struggle. it smacks smugness and belittles others womens bf experience

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