My husband. Arghhhhh!
We have just moved from a beautiful house, which we extended and renovated, to the point we were able to sell it for more than other same-size homes on the cul-de-sac were valued at/selling for. We hadn't quite got to market, someone came to look round, saw it, put an offer in there and then. That was the first week of April. We moved into an unloved house that needs much work, 3 weeks ago. It needed electrical work before we could move in, so we stayed with my mum. It is about the same size as the old house, but has a massive garden (which is why we moved - we have a child now), and whereas our last house was divided into three doubles and a box room/fitted office, this one is three big doubles including a huge attic room. In the last house we had a family bathroom and en-suite shower room; in this house, it's a 'family' bathroom with shower over the bath, and the bath is under the window, so you shower between two shower curtains! Obviously we are going to renovate the place and everything will change, but the size of that bathroom cannot be changed without eating into the third bedroom's size, and we don't want to do that. Our office area will be at the end of the landing as that's a big enough area.
So anyway, when we looked round the house, we thought it would be nice for our two year old daughter to have the attic room, as we could imagine her bringing friends home and having sleep-overs, then as she gets older having her own space to get away from us. However, when we moved in, it really became apparent (to me) that a) we needed to find a way to fit in an en-suite somewhere; b) the en-suite would only really work in the attic room; c) we, as the grown-ups, should have the attic room as our daughter's playroom (until a 2nd child maybe comes along) will be the third bedroom which is next door to the 2nd bedroom and the family bathroom.
We do have a downstairs loo.
There are several factors: we both feel we want a shower cubicle, and I have actually slipped many times climbing out of a shower bath (we considered an omnitub); we need a bath for our daughter, and we both enjoy a bath from time to time; we can't fit both in the bathroom; our daughter is 2 and if we are all on the same floor and have the attic as spare/playroom, we will disturb her sleep when we get up for the loo/shower late or early. His only surrender, is to say she can have an en-suite shower room in her attic room, but that we are not having that room ourselves.
Now, I have tried explaining a number of issues to my husband, that influence this, and I'm hoping some other parents might see my point. Having been a nanny (now a teacher), for many years before having my own child, I have encountered a fair few toileting issues/ logistical issues, and want to avoid them now while we have a chance to get the layout sorted. So:
- Imagine our daughter has the attic room, she wakes up at 2am desperate for a wee, she has to walk across her room, down a flight of stairs and along a long landing, before getting to a loo. I see accidents;
- I often have my shower after she goes to bed/before she gets up - what's the point having a shower cubicle I can't use, as I will end up needing to shower over the bath if the shower cubicle is in her room;
- If she has the 3rd room and we have the 2nd room, we will disturb her;
- If we have the attic room with no en-suite, it will be a pain in the wobbly backside to have to trundle down the stairs every time I need a pee (when I was growing up, we had a downstairs bathroom and loo, and I used to lie in bed to the point of tears of discomfort because I didn't want to get up in the cold/dark to go!).
I have lost my train of thought really, but am I being unreasonable to expect that we have the attic room and add an en-suite so that a shower cubicle and a third floor loo can be achieved? The 2nd room is not much smaller than the attic room (we are talking a couple of feet either way), and it is next door to the third room which will be the spare room/playroom, and the family bathroom so that she has close access to a loo.
My husband's concers: she will be stolen by a burglar and we won't know; when she is 15 and rebels, she will escape and we won't know; it is quieter up in the attic away from the downstairs noise, so nicer for her; it's like a big den for her.
I'm thinking that, as a growing girl, I'd rather have had my own bathroom and playroom next door to my bedroom, than my own stairs and an attic bedroom and having to run down a flight of stairs to the loo!!