...to not want the neighbour's fag butts in my garden?

[NiniLegsInTheAir]

Neighbours on one side have just had the top of their garden paved & have been using it for BBQs etc. They've been out there most evenings recently with friends - they don't actually smoke themselves but some of their friends do.

Was playing with DD in the garden last night and noticed a little pile of about 6 fag butts that must have been thrown over the fence from that side (where their patio is, can't have come from anywhere else). Was a bit annoyed so I threw them back over.

DD is at that age where practically everything goes in her mouth - I don't want her picking them up if I can help it.

Husband tells me I should have just disposed of them myself and it was mean to throw them bak. Now I feel all nasty-neighbour.

Whoops - back not bak.

Yanbu. I would have thrown the vile things back too.

As it sounds like the first time this has happened i would've probably just disposed of them myself. If it keeps happening though just have a polite word with them....mention you're worried your DD will pick them up...they'll probably be horrified when they realise and will keep their friends in check (hopefully!).

Also if it was their friends, not them, they may be completely unaware that this is happening.

They're not very nice Dawn so I doubt they'd be horrified (and that may have influenced my decision a tad ). But I still feel mean.

I sympathise and agree that if it happens again have a word. If it was friends of theirs then by throwing them back maybe they'll realise they need to provide an ashtray.

I live in flats and butts thrown from higher balconies than ours end up on ours and the flat roof beneath several windows is littered with the damn things (there is a lip so they are there forever). You see people throwing cigarette butts a lot, I wish this habit would be seen for what it is ie littering and antisocial.

YANBU, I would have thrown them back as well. Yuck.

Not unreasonable to throw them back over. How rude of your neighbours' guests.

Yes...throw them back! Quite right.

Throw them back!

YADNBU, I would dispose of them, but if it happened again politely mention it.

YANBU - I would have done exactly what you did. Especially if the neighbours are not very friendly.

Yuck.

YANBU. I'd have thrown them back, as well.

Happens to my elderly neighbour. She does just throw them back.

I would have collected them up, knocked on their door and handed them straight to them.

If anything just to see the look on their faces

yanbu

Don't feel bad or mean! YANBU, at all. They will get the message loud and clear, I would hope.

The teenage son of the neighbour who throws fags into elderly neighbour's garden would smoke in the bathroom; then throw the used roll-ups onto the shared drive. I was not impressed!!

So i waited until he next opened the window to smoke & made a big fuss of kicking the fag ends onto their drive, saying loudly ''how gross''... that worked because he was embarrassed.

His dad is usually drunk so he is a lost cause though.

Gross. Guy next to me told his wife he'd stopped smoking but didn't and threw the butts into the next neighbor's garden to hide them. She pitched them back at first but when it just kept happening she collect a bunch in a plastic baggie and tied them to his front door. Stopped after that.

Fine for people to smoke in their back gardens but why should they expect someone else to clean up?

I would have thrown them back

YANBU, but you might need to have a word with neighbour if it's going to happen again. Your neighbours don't smoke you said but if they are having a get together in their garden they should provide ashtrays. Where did they think the fag ends had gone if they were not on their patio or in their bin - vanished into thin air? It's disgusting and I hate seeing fag ends all over pavements, especially with young kids around and picking things up. This country looks enough like a giant ashtray as it is, you don't want it in your garden too.

That said, I would have a word with the neighbour (politely )so that it hopefully doesn't happen again, mention your DC putting things in mouth. Hope it stops for you.