WIBU to send them back or say something

[imnotmymum]

OK. I have a Son who just turned 9. My step MIL has a DD who 9 and a bit. We do only see each other a couple of times a year as live in differing parts of country but speak, text regularly so always in contact. We have conversation about kids and her DD is large for her age and then we discuss my DS who is tall but skinny and we discuss best places for clothes etc. she does call him "small" but he is not just sporty and a healthy weight. On his birthday they sent him a tshirt and shorts. The t shirt fine (although not his thing as a character top of something he not into but ...) but the shorts were age 11-12 and so obviously would not fit him and she would have been aware as we spoke the previous week. My DH is cross as it seems thoughtless and my DS is not really bothered as easy come easy go but should I mention it or ask her to change them or just leave it?

Her daughter might be wearing clothes much bigger, and maybe she thought that the sizes were coming up small.

I would just leave it, personally.

I'd just keep them til he grows into them - not worth falling out over?

I'd keep them, but write in the thank you note that you're keeping them for him to grow into as they're too big at the moment. Boys grow like weeds, they'll fit eventually, shorts are always useful!

It's just a slightly thoughtless present, not really worth getting het up over. Sounds like stepMiL just had her brain in neutral when she was present shopping.

Leave it! I wouldn't be offended at all. Lots of people buy clothes that are too big as gifts for children, as they'll grow into them.

Or maybe as I have done several times, buy something and realise when I get home that the size in the hanger isn't the size on the label.

It's not thoughtless.

I've bought my youngest niece dresses before now and got the sizes completely wrong. They look like they'll fit her when they are on the hangers but in reality they drown her.

My SIL just tells me she'll have to wait until she can put her in them.

Sizes are difficult even more so if she never really sees him.

Rather have something too big than too small.

YABU. She could have looked at them and thought that the next size down looked too small. He will grow into them.

Yes in about 3 years!! I get the point but really if you had spoken to someone about him being a age 8 school trouser and so and so good as they do long etc as he tall and skinny would you really have bought your GS a size 11-12? Just thought it may be more useful to have a pair he can wear and ask her to exchange

I'd either keep them for when he grows into them, which he will at some point, or try to exchange them myself for the right size. Sending them back to her seems like a slightly hostile action in response to a present.

There are loads of reasons why she may have thought those were an appropriate size to get that aren't necessarily to do with her being thoughtless. Your DP is over reacting slightly, unless of course she has form for this kind of thing, but even then don't rise to the bait and just thank her for the present.

If it's a gift, it is always better to buy bigger IMO. Kids grow.

Maybe she thought she was being helpful? I'm super-organised about buying clothes for the DC and always buy the next year's size in the sales. In fact, DS now has a complete wardrobe for next year :)

I would just keep them till they fit. I find that clothes come up small and buy age 10-11 years for my 8 year son and he is a normal size

Meant to say... when I'm buying clothes for other people's children I always buy a size bigger than I think they'll need. They'll grow into bigger clothes but clothes that are too small are useless.

Is keep them tbh. By the time you've paid postage and packaging its not worth it.

My DD is 2 and I have a wardrobe full of ages 3, 4 and 5 as I buy stuff when I see it/when it's in the sale.

I think it's very strange that you seem to be so affronted as someone buying age 11/12 shorts for a 9 year old . If you want to ask her to exchange them then do, but I don't get why you are so bothered really.

Unless they have a character on them that will be unsuitable in a year or so (my mother once bought my dd a tshirt with upsy daisy on age 9 when she was only 2 - doubt she will wear that) I would just put them away for the future. Yes it is a bit thoughtless but it could have been too small and would never have been any use! Also I do that AKMD so always have a suitcase full of clothes waiting to be grown into

I did not mean to send them back grumpily just to exchange we have done this for FIL when size come up wrong. I think the point my DH is making that it was his bday and they are obviously too big and when get pressies nice to use/wear them. I may be overthinking this but sometimes I feel she thinks he ought to be bigger when she says he "small" he is not at all just normal whereas her DD is a ladies 12 and gets stuff shortened Is she making the point I should fatten him up ?? Or am I just bonkers Ok I can take it ...

just say thanks and keep them till next yr-cant see why ur annoyed tbh

Is there any chance that she just really liked the shorts and got them anyway, knowing that they'd be too big, because she'd like your son to have them?

As other posters have said, I'd much rather have things that are too big and can be grown into rather than getting something that's too small. To me that shows much less thought than providing something that's too big.

No they run of the mill Kappa swim shorts. I am annoyed as I put so much thought into her DD pressie I know that should not mean automatically gets a return but eh

Can you not just exchange them yourself? Surely if they have the tags on you can just take them to the shop and swap for the smaller size?

I buy my own DC things in the wrong size, as they look about right on the hanger.

I would leave it.

MIL bought DD1 a pair of PJs for her 2nd birthday, age 4 - 5!??!!

DD2 was given a hooded fur coat age 6 - 9 months when she was born. She is coming up to 6 months now, it is 32 degrees outside. Yes we live abroad and it is always hot in the summer.

MIL also bought DD1 a handbag for her 1st birthday (not suitable for 0 - 3, choking hazard).

I don't think much thought ever goes into DCs presents. But i have never said anything, it just isn't worth the hassle.

I do agree Grey but sometimes I feel like saying something !! Why should we put up with it !!