to get a bit peeved about people moaning about 6 weeks of holidays with their DCs?

[Abgirl]

Have seen at least 2 facebook messages this morning complaining about how long the summer holidays are - 1 has even worked out the number of days until their DCs were back to school! It might seem like a long time now but the days are long and the years are short - I work FT and would love 6 weeks off to spend with my DCs :(.

I love the holidays.

I'm a teacher.

RubyFakeNails: aren't you worried that your dc will read all the negative stuff you write about your experience of motherhood on Mumsnet? Your profile makes you (and them) totally recognisable.

I now know you as a poster who dislikes being a parent. Perhaps your dc would be hurt to read all about that on the internet in years to come?

Gawd, it's just that people like to moan about stuff. Sometimes it is like a strange joke where parents seem to enjoy competetive complaining because whining about your dc is considered par for the course.

I love the holidays but I dud used to fret. The quiet concern I had about their having a shit holiday and it being my fault was usually expressed as 'bloody hell, they are going to drive me batty' rather than 'christ it's a bit intimidating - they will get bored and I will feel awful'

Like everyone else here - I love my kids and love having the time to spend with them.

However, very few people can afford to go out everyday and do all the summer activities. I do not drive and so am limited to what we can do and for some reason all the normal groups finish throughout the summer holidays. All this makes it a long old six weeks. I have money to do a day out once a week (something decent) and then we rely on parks, soft play and renting out £1 Dvds from blockbuster, painting, tv, jigsaws and dressing up.

All well and good but not all dc's get along and so mums/ dads can be left with bickering kids for days on end and it can drive one to their wits end.

So YABU a bit...but a shame if people dread them (thought some people have good reason)

I for one would like the holidays spread out more.

YANBU, I hate the school run and the limitations of school hours on having fun with my toddler so I can't wait to have my lovely DS(5) with us when we're out and about.

We're lucky and live near the Seaside so I can do lots of free things with them.

If it is raining we still go out to the parks. They both have waterproofs and as it is not cold so they both still really enjoy it. There was terenchal rain last Saturday and DS was thrilled by the speed with which he could shoot down the slide, scoot through huge puddles. DD is only 15 months but it doesn't phase her at all she also loves the slides, puddles the swings with her all in one waterproof!

Bring on the freedom I say!!

Oh and I live in a 2 bedroom flat with a balcony, no garden to throw them into, limited space but even if I had a house it would have to be a large mansion with a huge garden to keep me at home more than I am now. I enjoy taking my children out. I visit my mum's big house but I still want to take the children out once a day at least.

Mintyy it doesn't concern me, they couldn't care less what I write on mn, they think it's 'odd' I speak to people online. They see what I post when they sit next to me, it's not an issue.

Also more importantly I'm open about not liking being a parent at home. I understand that sounds as if I've traumatised them for life to feel unwanted. However, it's more of a mummy loves you very much but I don't know what I'm doing, I was raised the same way by my mum, who is of the 'never have children' brigade. Unfortunately I doubt it's inevitable one of my children will have children, I don't want them to feel pressurised to be a perfect parent or that as a mother you have to be certain things. They understand that saying I wish I hadn't had children isn't the same as saying I wish I hadn't had them, I know because I understood that yet I'm really close to my dm an my dc are close to me.

I've never posted anything on here I wouldn't say to them.

Larkin's poem comes mind....

Hello Ruby
I didn't want kids either, til I hit 35. I have a 6 year old, finding it slightly easier as she gets older. Still don't know what I'm doing half the time, which increases the stress....

You are NBU that you are peeved about people moaning on fb. But YABU to think everyone just loves to spend 6 or more weeks with their own children. I love my dds dearly but they can absolutely drive me up the wall with their whining. There's no proper summer weather this year (any year!), we have no family either near or alive, no money to pay for days out, the usual clubs/sports are term time only (why??), activity camps/holiday childcare costs a fortune, and I am not a natural entertainer/teacher/leader whatever and find it hard to think of what to do with two young children all by myself day after day after day. It's going to be hard, and yes, I am looking forward to September already. Because when the older one is at school and younger one in nursery ( I only work part time) we spent the time we have as quality time.
Having said that, I wouldn't moan on facebook about it.

YABU

What about the single parent who cannot earn enough to cover childcare for 3 children for the long school holidays? Who has to find cheap/free ways to entertain DC from 6am-8pm? Who has no car, lives in a city with little open space, no help nearby?

Must be a breeze.

BTW, I love DH to bits. But I would kill him if I had to spend every single day with him. And that is the problem with young children, you cannot decide to have some time to yourself, to take a lunch hour talking to friends or read a book for an hour on a train (can you tell I kind of miss working?!) If children are at home, they are at home. They cannot (assuming a young age) just hop on a bus and go to the cinema, or go out for dinner. If you have no help nearby, you cannot get someone to take them for a few hours. If your friends with DC are going away on holiday, you cannot even arrange childcare swaps.

ANYONE who was around me every single day from waking to sleeping for 6 weeks in a row would irritate me. Even darling DC!

Well I am working FT now and it will be the first summer holiday I havent been at home with my DC, I have 6 days off with them

mine break up in 40 mins and i cant wait. I love the holidays if it rains fuck it we have coats and wellies no problem with parks or indeed the beach it will be quieter at least. No doubt they will drive me mad as will I them dp is working the entire time and we won't do half of what I have planned but we have no pe kit to find no packed lunches to pull mashed banana out of first thing in the morning and i have them all to myself for a whole 6 weeks We do live in york though so loads to do

Do you think perhaps the complaint is more about the length of the holiday than the fact that they don't want to spend that time with their kids?

DS starts school in September, and DH and I have done nothing but moan about all the school holidays and how the hell we're going to cover them with our 10 weeks between us. That doesn't mean we don't want to see DS though...

YABU. This crops up every year.Someone gets an idea in their minds that other people should never complain, because they don't have exactly the same problems as THEY do.

I like the summer holidays. The school holidays here are 9 weeks long, and there have been years when I've enjoyed it more than others. This year, for example, it has rained constantly so far, we live in a remote location and don't have much money for activities. My dcs are 10 and nearly 14 - pretend tea parties don't cut it any more, and there are only so many trips to the library you can do. We're having as good a time as we can, but what does it matter to you if someone else dares to complain a bit?

All I'm asking for is, say, 2 hours a day when I can go to the loo alone and without being called mid wee.
Maybe a meal where I get to cook what I want, and eat the food while it is still hot.
Make a phone call without having to lock self in a room to ensure p&q.
Maybe read a chapter of a book that doesn't involve rachel Kirsty and the fucking fairies.
Maybe watch a programme that doesn't feature a cbbc or cbeebies logo in the corner.
Maybe complete a task without the relevant bits being made in to something not at all useful.
This is why it's a helliday cos the lack of mental space drives me nuts!
(dd I love you btw)

9 weeks does seem very long. TBH, I think I just miss the bliss that was nursery, DS attended 5 afternoons a week and it was so much better than the repetitive grind that is the school run - I can't stand it! I should be used to it by now as DS has just finished Reception year but I still pine after the nursery days- no packed lunch, mornings with DS, no parent politics, no demands basically!

Well, I'm just glad that the sun has seen fit to come out. I love the holidays but we can't afford to go anywhere this year and I wasn't really looking forward to having three teenagers crawling the walls, desperate to go out but with nowhere to go without spending a fortune. As long as the rain stays away I'll be happy.

CockyPants - I couldn't agree more!!

I just don't get these self righteous types trotting out the "Why have kids.." old chestnut. Being a mum is bloody hard work and everyone needs a bit of time to themselves. Having to entertain very young kids for eight weeks is hard core.

I plead guilty to having a moan on Facebook but it was meant in a light-hearted way - I love my kids more than anything but I enjoy being a parent more when I get a bit of time off.

Also, as some posters have pointed out, it totally depends on circumstances and levels of support.

Actually, it's been a tough day with my two so I'm off to hit the bottle. Glass of chilled Pinot anyone?

Yes please Gabby!
Bums up!

YAB two kinds of U

Understandable, but still unreasonable.

Just because you love a person doesn't mean you want to spend 6 weeks with them 24/7, especially if you have no more money than usual to spend on doing interesting things.