I am being invaded. I shall go on to the end. I will fight in the conservatory, I

[HoneyDragonWearingLederhosen]

will fight in the kitchen and by the back door. I will fight with growing confidence and with the Miele Air. I WILL defend my home whatever the cost may be. I shall never surrender.

Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrgh! Chaaaaaaaaaaarge!

(I am so NBU)

True Sue, if I'd put cinnamon in my crack in the first place I'd have never of got twat spiders

OMG Honey LOL

I still haven't read about the twat spiders. Pleeeeaase can I have a link?

I'll smile nicely. :)

What you need is a plague of toads

You do know Honey, that if one of those wee feckers bites you, they lay an egg in the bite and the egg swells and then hatches and is a worm inside you that is TEN FEET long and has to be twirled out on a pencil and if you wee in the river then all its mates swim up the wee and join it and then they have a party and eat your organs or sell them and you wake up in a bath of ice with a doctor's phone number on your chest? So be very careful .

Yes, send them here - my chickens love ants in any form.

Can't you send your chickens here?

we have non flying ants, they seem to come the same time of year, either the guest bathroom or the kitchen. This year it is both. We are feeding them borax mixed with sugar syrup, they love it, then die.

A few of these and you can host a new Olympic event in your conservatory.

Theonewiththehair. It's in classics, I'll link it when I'm off the twatphone

I think Sue has been reading The Sun newspaper again.

Thanks HoneyDragon.

We had an ant invasion at the house we used to rent. I kept seeing one or two around and eventually followed one into the walk-in wardrobe which had ant-coloured carpet.

Further investigations revealed that the whole wardrobe was full of ants. They had even got into the mini chest of drawers where I kept my socks and tights. I had to throw away every item of hosiery I owned! Everything got dumped in the bath while I screamed abuse at the ants and hit them with things.

I won in the end.

The woodlice at our current house were a little more persistent. We got a new back door in the end. That showed the little bastards.

Show'em whose boss, OP!

They appear to have retreated.

my twat spider shame

It wasn't the Sun, it was the Mail.

Immigrant Ants Give You Cancer and Claim £££ in Benefits from Princess Diana's Memory

Or something like that. Bastards.

Did the new back door have a little wood louse flap in it or something?
Or didn't you give them a set of the new keys?

I found a few in the bath tub this morning, I washed them down the drain and hope that it stands as a lesson to the rest of the ants not to come in our house. The bathroom had a huge invasion one year, I had to put down tin foil and terro, we watched them for a couple of days, taking the stuff back to the nest like it was crack. None came back until this morning.

Vinegar stopped the walking ones trying to invade our house. No idea about flying ones though except a big fan?

You've filled your cracks with cinnamon? Man you are gonna itch!

You've filled your cracks with cinnamon? Man you are gonna itch!

So you're being invaded by antAnt and antDec?

I appear to be winning. A few lingerers from the aerial attack are circling in the rafters.

The cinnamon defence is holding.

I have just read about the twat spiders. Brilliant but oh I'm clenching now!

I like ants

I'd rather have flying ants than wasps any day.

I like to watch them crawl up sticks in order to fly off into the sunset and pastures new.

We've got ants under the floorboards by the door in the lounge. I've been hoovering the flying ants up every 30 minutes over the last couple of days.