to not let DH off with this?

[worrywortisworrying]

On Friday, we went out for dinner. I had 3 glasses of wine. I felt fine when we got home, but around 9:30, felt a bit dodgy and went to bed. At around10pm that night, my son was ill and DH sorted him out. The next morning, DH was furious with me for not getting up with DS.

As of 4pm yesterday, my DH has been ill. He went to bed, did not say goodbye to my DSD2 (who walked home, to save me putting my 2 kids in the car to drive her), sent me a text at 4:50am this morning to tell me that he was not going to work and to not disturb him. Sent me a text at 8:30 asking for some stuff and his book . Stayed out of sight until about 4pm and appeared until it was made VERY clear that I was NOT about to let it go and then he made a great recovery. I have left him deal with both DC since.

AIBU to make it clear that him clearing off for 24 hours because he's 'ill' is no worse than me clearing off for less than 4 hours because I'd had too much to drink (even though, as it appears, I'd probably got the same bug).

I've thrown every line he threw at me on Saturday morning back at him this afternoon. There is no way on earth I could bail for 24 hours, no questions asked. He'd go MENTAL if I asked him to take a day off work. Never mind, just sent him a text at 5am and TOLD HIM.

AIBU?

Leave the Bastard

Compromise usually works better than his approach.

Although I'm sure you'll get told off for drinking too much :)

He doesn't sound very nice to me.

Well I think you two need to start communicating in a more constructive way. Nobody seems to be acting well except the DSD2. You were both ill why is neither of you kinder to each other. Are you having deeper relationship issues?

He was BU in the first place. YABabitU to assume he is not really all that ill, but I can understand where you are coming from!

But what is all this texting? Do you not live in the same house? Do you not go to see him to see what he needs, and vice versa?

And I hope you are both better soon!

why were you texting each other in the early hours not talking?

"At around10pm that night, my son was ill and DH sorted him out. The next morning, DH was furious with me for not getting up with DS."

Jeez they are his kids too....

he was BU, you were a bit U.
Why is he texted you at silly times, where were you?
Maybe you should talk more.

He sounds like a twat! Why did he need you to get up with your DS? Is he not the dad? Is he incapable in some way?
Texting at 5am is odd. Were you not in bed next to each other?
And I hope you didn't take him his stuff at 8.30!

i would assume he was pissed off because he sorted his ill stepson out late at night and then had to get up early the next day because the wife slept in because of a hangover.

you know the same thing many on here whine about when the guy goes out drinking and they expect them to be up regardless of how shitty they feel.

since when is 3 glasses of wine hangover/ill straight away territory? More likely that she was ill or ate something dodgy.

Long story re. texts.

Suffice to say, we were in different houses (we have a strange house which actually has 3 / 4 different accomodation blocks.) Texting is more straight forward than trying to phone between houses.

Penisvan, I had to get my friends husband to pick her up the other night as she was drunk. She had a Pimm's and a wine.
I can drink all night but some can't. 3 glasses of wine is hangover central for some.

Why don't you sleep in the same room? I assume there are lots of other issues.

Minimisschief - The ill child was HIS son and his ill wife can normally cope with LOTS more than 3 glasses of wine

I didn't sleep in, I simply didn't get up at 10pm when my son was ill. I heard DH deal with it so left him to it as I felt dodgy too.

But thanks so much for the support.

DPrince - we do still have a relationship, but haven't really slept in the same bed since the kids were born. It's too complicated to explain.

I didn't say you didn't. Tbh I am going to stick with my original 'you are both U'. None of this makes sense, and I don't get wheat his wife has to do with anything
Its the nearest I can come to deciding is you both sound unreasonable and a bit childish.

I'm his wife, DPrince

OP didn't say she was a lightweight though, so the assumption would be that she was ill, not drunk.
He sounds like a bit of a twat.

YANBU - his child, he's as capable of looking after them as you, and for most people 3 glasses of wine over the course of an evening is not enough to make them ill (if it is, then they know it already) so clearly you were coming own with the bug.

Shutting yourself away (apart from requests for books) for 24 hours is absolutely ridiculous when you have children.

So he got mad because he had to parent his own son?

What is it with some men.

I don't get the referring to yourself in the third person. Wasn't very clear
as you said HIS son I assumed you meant his ex and the mother of this boy but I take it the boy is both of yours? As I said he shouldn't have had a go as he had to get up, but I think you should let it go.

The boy in question is HIS son and My Son

The man in question is my husband, and I am his wife.

I am not sure why I should let it go, given I took a major battering over a few hours, when it's patently obvious that I had the same bug, yet he disappeared for 24 hours and expected a loving welcome.

Him making a big deal about looking after his child would piss me off bigtime. What a knob!!

If I was you, I'd tell his wife