To expect more than 4 parents out of 20 to say "thank you"...

[GarryBaldy]

... after I've taken their DCs away for the weekend in a voluntary capacity?

I'm a Brownie leader, and have spend the weekend at a somewhat muddy camp. On returning the children to their parents the majority swept them away without a word of thanks.... oh, apart from the 1 parent who complained that we were late back...

Well, am I?

\i just dont think some can comprehend that people actually donate time for the good of other I guess they assume they get paid doesnt make it right though I thank teachers drs people in shops and they get paid,

My son attends cubs and gets to go on day trips and stay overs. I've always felt like the overbearing mother going over with him to allow him to say thank you and then to thank them myself for having him. The leaders always look so busy and tired (who can blame them?) that I sometimes wondered if I was just getting in the way going over. Nice to know from this thread a thank you is still appreciated but maybe this is the reason some parents just whisk them off?

My DS went to camp with Cubs last weekend. I didn't say 'thank you' when I picked him up because it was quite chaotic and the leaders were surrounded by people, looking tired and stressed, trying to load the last few items into the boot of their car. Honestly, I thought I would thank them at the next session because they just looked like they wanted everyone to clear off so that they could go home. I thought that they would be there for another hour or so if all 30 families queued up to have a little chat. Am thinking that they probably moaned about me now! Must remember to say thank you on Thursday!

It was the same when I was a cub/brownie and beaver leader. I really think people just don't realise the amount of time and effort you put into it. The children always had a great time, but it was hard work. Aside from the meetings, there would generally be at least one evening a week doing other things, admin, planning ahead, maintenance etc. Preparations for camps would start months in advance. Many, many hours went into it. Mostly, it was enjoyable, as we had a great group of volunteers, but it could be a bit much in combination with the full time jobs/studies each of us had as well.

One year though, when coming back from a week long camping trip, a few of the parents had gotten together and organised a picnic of loads of lovely food and drinks (wine!) for us to enjoy after all the children had gone home. That was an amazing surprise. Really quite a simple thing to do, but such a lovely gesture of appreciation.

It is really hard to find enthusiastic volunteers to run scout troops. Those that come in often drop out again soon, because it just takes up too much of precious free time. Please show your appreciation for the people who work so hard on their own time, to make sure your child has a great time!

adeucalione, I can completely see that, you have to judge each situation at the time, so long as they do get a thank you later.

YANBU. But as a teacher, I am also not surprised.

I shall thank you on their behalf.

Without people like you who give up vast amounts of their time, efforts and energy to voluntarily do things like this for other people's children, they wouldn't get these great opportunities.

It's one thing having adventures with your family, but adventures with your peers and other adults is so much fun!

But yes, I agree that the parents don't realise how much planning goes into this sort of thing. They either don't think about it, or think that someone is paid up at Scouting/GirlGuiding HQ to arrange/plan/organise it all and that you just turn up 10 minutes before they do!

Had I been one of the patents, I might have imagined that you were shattered and just wanted to go home, not want 20-odd sets of parents to come over and thank you/make small talk. So depending on lots of subtle un-within factors I might not have thanked y at pick up. But I would at the next brownie meeting, and probably give wine/chocolates or flowers or summat.....have you had a brownie meeting since? You may have to eat humble pie...they've probably had a collection and got you something to say thanks?

Un-within= in-situ

.they've probably had a collection and got you something to say thanks

If only!

After 6 years of Beavering, I left at the beginning of the year because of a parent and their attitude. I was treated worse than scum....but I was still OK to take their children away for a weekend.

For those that say they never say thanks, please just send an email later in the day or a text to say thank you and say what a great time your child had on camp. It will take you seconds, but will mean a lot to the leader in charge.

None of us are paid.

I've just done a camp and most of our parents did come and say thank you, in fact quite a few arrive early to help with the tents etc which is a great help (and I make sure I say 'thank you' to them ).

Can I use this thread (as I do twice a year!!) to remind parents to give a proper thank you - card or gift (or just verbal) - to all the volunteer leaders who do so much for our children. I know a lot of you always give teachers' end of year presents but I think it is even more important to do it for the volunteers (not just saying it so that I get presents !!!).

YANBU.That is really quite offensive.I am hoping that they were so overcome when they saw their precious little bunnies return, it went out of their mind and that they will be in touch to thank you properly.

I always say Thank you, even at after school club that I pay lots of money for I still thank them for the care they have given them.
Thanking voluntary organisations is a given!

Outrageous ! Although it should really be the children who thank you.

We always pick-up with a gift of wine/cake/biscuits/chocolates for the relevant individuals who have given up their weekend to ensure the dc get this sort of fun opportunity.

Does this count as a thankyou from us as parents ?

I find its the same parents who don't say thank you who also ask no questions before camp. Turn up with the health form and consent form (late) and bundle the kids on the coach.

It never ceases to amaze me that parents just hand over their kids to us for a week without even trying to get to know us/ask the most basic of questions about/of us.

We have done all the relevant paperwork (I'm currently writing a risk assessment for this years camp!) We have got the relevant qualifications and we have all done this sort of camp many times before... But I can't remember the last time a parent asked me about any of that...

So not saying thank you because they are so relieved to have the kids back... Just doesn't wash I'm afraid. And if there is truth in that theory, perhaps there is some communication based way of alleviating the worry?

YANBU in the slightest. Even if you were being paid to do it, it's just basic manners to say thank you when someone has done something for you (given your child a nice experience).

I regularly run training courses for adults and out of a group of 20, we will get 2-3 thank yous at the end of the day on average. Seems bad manners and a sense of entitlement are everywhere!

-Coke yes that does count! And makes you that rare (approx. 1 in. Fifty) families who leaders love forever!

Sarcalogos you make a really good point, I have been a Leader for over 35 years and I have only ONCE been asked about arrangements, what training we have had etc etc. It is amazing that parents will just leave their children without asking the most basic of questions. I also agree about the health and consent forms, so much of the Leaders' time is spent chasing paperwork, not to mention payment .

sadly, there are some people who are rude oiks with no concept of manners or how to conduct themselves in public.

UANBU
But the end of the DDs last three camps has been so rushed I didn't see a leader or teacher to speak to.

Yes you should say thank you when you get the chance, but school and Guides tend to have moved on to the next thing and you forget.
I did Brownies and generally the girls reactions to things were thanks enough. I always thanked the DDs brownie leader, but parents generally turn up for last brownie bells and to help collect the last of the luggage. It's all much less rushed than the now the DDs are older and expected just to grab their own stuff and go.

I work in Children's Centres and we run groups for parents and children to play and learn together. I am often amazed at how parents turn up assuming they will be able to leave their child and pick them up later- on their first ever visit to the centre when neither the parent nor the child know the building or any of the staff!

Why are some people desperate to get rid of their children at every opportunity?

Maybe they think it is such an honour for you to ahve their little darlings

I think parents worry about looking like they don't trust you if they ask too much. They assume that you will have been given the correct training/safeguarding checks by the organising body. And they'd be right!

They don't want to look precious and over protective. They do want to show you they respect you.

But some parents just don't think and would leave their children to be minded by a tramp in a field if they thought they could get an hour off!

I see I am not alone in not receiving a thanks from the majority of parents or Brownies... Bejeezus I will let you know after this week's meeting whether I come back laden with gifts and heartfelt thanks - I've had no emails of thanks so, far, but I'll give them the benefit of the doubt; perhaps they are all waiting to see us face to face!

Great point Sarcalagos, and yes, we have our fair share of parents who we have to chase for cash and consent forms, and parents are all very trusting of us leaders. I find the stress of being responsible for other people's children quite overwhelming at times - with your own DCs you know their limits and their trigger points, but that is not the case with other people's children, and I am constantly on pins wondering whether they will be sensible and stay safe, as it is impossible to watch all of them all the time (and indeed that's not what we are about)