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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

with the school?

96 replies

yeahbaby · 10/07/2012 09:35

of me buying a new pair of school shoes for ds1, (12) for the remaining 8 days of school?
just had to a call from the school saying ds1 is not in correct school uniform so will be keeping him in isolation for the day and will continue to do so until he has the correct uniform.
i sent him hin with a note saying he had to wear his ( black) trainers, as his school shoes got ripped yesterday, at school, and i was not buying new ones for the remaining 8 days of school.
how did they get ripped?
a bright spark teacher decided to do something fun with the kids on their last lesson with him, and got them running about in the gym, ( in a spanish lesson) and another child stepped on his shoe at the same time as he lifted his foot. baasically taking the sole off.
there is no way i am buying a new pair of shoes, that he will grow out of before going back in sept.
aibu or is the school?

OP posts:
Original poster
yeahbaby · 10/07/2012 10:03

mary mary,
i have more than 1 suitable for work type shoes,he is 12 and unless he is at school he is in trainers or boots, and i can go on my own in my lunch hour or before or after work. i cant do that with him.
also his shoes were fine, if the teacher had stuck to doing the right lesson at the right time instead of getting them to do pe in a spanish lesson his shoes would have stayed fine.

OP posts:
picnicbasketcase · 10/07/2012 10:06

Not a fair comparison really Mary, children don't tend to have a whole array of school shoes to choose from like an adult would for work. Excluding a child from anything due to their footwear is ridiculous. Having to wear trainers will not affect his learning.

RevoltingChildren · 10/07/2012 10:08

Well if I only had 8 days left in a job and my work shoes broke then I too would manage with whatever I had for those last 8 days rather than buying a new pair.

My dc go a a private school with a strict uniform. They would not have an issue with this apart from if the child was on display at a school event such as performing in a concert of prize giving.

Ingles2 · 10/07/2012 10:09

You should be sticking to that point yeahbaby... His shoes are damaged because he wasn't dressed appropriately for gym. therefore they should compensate you for new shoes

FairhairedandFrustrated · 10/07/2012 10:09

Yanbu!!

squeakytoy · 10/07/2012 10:09

"i was at work. today he is at school and im working 12 till 6"

Supermarkets are open 24 hours and sell cheap black shoes, that would do the job.

HoneyDragonWearingLederhosen · 10/07/2012 10:16

They have gym shoes for gym activities.

His Spanish lesson was I. The gym doing gym stuff, if he'd been in the Spanish class doing Spanish it wouldn't have happened.

If the school can relax the rules for classes at the end of term they can relax the rules for uniform.

HoneyDragonWearingLederhosen · 10/07/2012 10:16

I. Is meant to be in.

Flisspaps · 10/07/2012 10:21

I'm with squeakytoy

Get him some cheap black supermarket shoes, they're open 24 hours.

Uniform is uniform. You signed up to the policy when you enrolled him in the school.

Chandon · 10/07/2012 10:24

get some glue and stick sole back on (pragmatic)

Catsu · 10/07/2012 10:26

My ds goes to s school with s very strict uniform policy and I wouldn't buy him new shoes in these circumstances. I'm pretty sure that even ds very strict school wouldn't expect me to either (and ds has to wear the correct colour socks etc usually!)

hectorthestandbyhawk · 10/07/2012 10:28

Ring the school and speak to the head.

Petsinmypudenda · 10/07/2012 10:29

I wouldn't buy shoes for 8 days at school either.

CharltonHairstyle · 10/07/2012 10:32

I think I would buy some cheapo supermarket shoes for the last few days.

They are being over the top with keeping him in isolation, but you would be being over the top by keeping him off school!

Buttwart · 10/07/2012 10:32

I have to wonder what kind of teacher actually behaves like this when there's 8 days of school left you know. I'd imagine not a nice one.

Buttwart · 10/07/2012 10:33

As in, punishing the child and ignoring the note. Surely it's wind down time?

Original poster
yeahbaby · 10/07/2012 10:35

im waiting for the head of year to call me back.
i think im pissed off cause i did send him in witht the right unifrom. he wasnt to know that they would change plans for the day. and normally he has trainers in his locker, but they took to locker keys back last monday, so unless he is having a pe lesson at the moment he isnt carrying all his kit in every day.

OP posts:
katykuns · 10/07/2012 10:38

Yeah but Mary, most people working don't have a massive summer holiday, and also adults don't tend to grow drastically meaning they won't fit when they return from a break :S

I think the school is being incredibly unreasonable... isolation for not wearing the right shoes?! ridiculous...

whosphuckoffy · 10/07/2012 10:40

Ok the school are being ott, but I think you are a bit too. Why not buy him some new shoes and he can wear them when he goes back September. I really doubt he'll be having major growth spurts by then. It's not that long. Plus if you get them now shoe shops are quiet. Much nicer to shop in and I bet they will stock every Shie you/he likes, without saying sorry we're out of stock of this one, that one etc

5madthings · 10/07/2012 10:42

the school is being unreasonable!

and if they were doing a sporty type activity they should have got the children to change into trainers and then this wouldnt have happened in the first place.

and re buying cheap shoes from the supermarket, maybe you all have children with normal feet and can but my children have wide feet, with a really high instep and they simply do NOT fit, literally often cant get them on their feet let alone done up!

its hugely annoying and expensive tbh, and quite gutting that there are often really nice shoes esp summer canvas types in the supermarket or next etc and they simply do not fit, i coudlnt even get the ones in next onto dd's feet when i tried the other day, even when i went up a size!

5madthings · 10/07/2012 10:43

he is a 12 yr old boy i bet if you buy shoes now they will not fit in sept! (mother of a 12 almost 13yr old who has just grown 2 sizes in the last 6 wks!)

Original poster
yeahbaby · 10/07/2012 10:47

whosphuckoffy, he is 12. off for a little over 6 weeks, and 2 weeks ish before break up.
in the next 8 weeks he will grow.
and he is a right flat footed hobbit child. ( flat and wide) so i have to buy decent shoes.

OP posts:
Sunscorch · 10/07/2012 10:48

You, on the other hand, are being unreasonable for blaming the teacher for the broken shoe.

HoneyDragonWearingLederhosen · 10/07/2012 11:03

She isn't blaming the teacher shes pointing out that if school had followed there own protocol the shoe wouldn't have broken.

5madthings · 10/07/2012 11:06

as they were in the gym doing sporty type stuff they should have changed into appropriate footwear, that it generally school policy, so the school are at fault.

and yeahbaby its a pita isnt it, would love to just be able to buy cheap shoes but no its normally £40-£50 a pair! and as you say he will grow out of them before sept!