To be concerned about the amount of women fantising about an abusive rapist...

[BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability]

Just to add to the other six million 50 shades threads

Btw, I will point out that I haven't actually read them, though I have become slightly addicted to reading the funny blogs and reviews (and of course, the cookie monster reading on YouTube!)

How are so many women missing that he is abusive? Wtf?

He neither abuses nor rapes her, so your question is irrelevant.

It is a stupid, badly written book though - and about as erotic as a bucket of dead fish.

Thanks for clearing that up, whatmeworry. Sounds like I'd rather have a bat than this Grey clown. I love bats, flying mice they are.

Of course YABU and no offence but its a bit stupid to start a thread about something you haven't read and know nothing about

I think the women getting excited by this pile of horse shit but lead EXTREMELY dull lives, apologies. The Sex is yawny boring and the descriptions of the characters are so dull. I have forced myself to read to the endin the hope something would happen and have not been excited by it in the slightest.

That said, no rape, very little actual domination and zero abuse.

And by excited I mean posting about MR Grey on FB every 20 mins. Googling pics of suitable men to play the part and generally being simpering idiots

apologies

Stands to reason, as both the leads are simpering idiots too.

Surely his controlling behaviour is abusive though? Having a hissy fit because she wants to visit her mum is one example i can remember off the top of my head? This is what I'm talking about, not the sex stuff.
I mean the more hinted at abusive behaviour, not straight up "Ana burns the dinner so Christian gives her a slap". The type of stuff that does get played down in real relationships, so I have no problem with it happening in the book, just that so many people think this relationship is what they should be aspiring to.

IYSWIM?

And again, yes I know I admit I haven't read the whole book, but I have read a considerable amount of direct quotes, I may be a bit daft starting this thread, but I'm not completely stupid

My SIL keeps going on about it on FB, I've nearly been sick in my mouth a few times.

Mind you, I was surprised to learn she can actually read.

Yank

As I said on another thread yank, my MIL asked my DH to put it on her kindle. He was a bit sick...

Yes, he's very controlling - but I'm not sure I'd go so far as to say he was "abusive".

He had a traumatic childhood which has led to extreme overprotectiveness and food obsessions. I suppose the idea being that a) he couldn't protect his mother so he needs to protect Ana and b) can't bear the thought of anyone being hungry after being half starved as a child.

Am I making it sound like I like this book? I didn't - it's utter shite.

I think the "rape" bit you're thinking of is in the first book. She reads up on BDSM and jokingly sends him an email saying "OK, read up on it. It's been nice knowing you". He doesn't realise she's joking & shows up at her place 10 minutes later and they have sex. A blogger I've read interpreted it as him showing up to fuck her into changing her mind, but I didn't read it like that. He showed up because he was panicked by the thought of her dumping him.

Shame - in the right hands, it could have been a good book. Alas, it is not :)

I skim read part of the book in Tesco as i was trying to decide if i could be bothered to buy it... but the actual personality of Ana just put me off; she seemed to be an irritating idiot who doesn't talk like any real woman who i've met.
I have read another BDSM novel on the internet, managed to get halfway through & gave up because it was totally shite. I think it was written by a man this time, but the main female character was again, a totally submissive stupid dippy idiot...
Some of my colleagues are boasting on Facebook about reading 50 Shades; if they enjoyed it that's fine, it's just not for me.
I bought a World War 2 history book instead... but won't be boasting about that on Facebook! Or my colleagues will think i'm very odd & boring

Oops forgot to answer the OP's question - i'm not sure why some women fancy Christian Grey exactly, in the parts of the book i read he just seemed like a cliched unrealistic stereotype. Controlling but not abusive - & lots of my colleagues do have husbands who are controllling definitely; they put up with it & think i'm odd for admitting to being a feminist...

My mum is currently reading this.
I've read the first two and started the third but haven't told her, I'm scared she'll start discussing the plot with me and then I'll have to clap my hands over my ears and shout 'la la la la la la la' loudly til she stops!

To answer your question op, he's not a particularly sexy or even likeable character in my opinion, but is no rapist and is controlling but not abusive, apart from in their sub/Dom relationship which Ana consents to.

If you are interested enough to start a thread here and spend time googling quotes, you could just ad them then you'd have the full picture.

Haven't read it either but am sick to death of it already.
So many playground mums who are so prudish they can't talk about anything remotely sex related all, standing around giddily talking about a rude book like 14 year olds.
Numerous facebook statuses about going off to bed with Mr Grey.
Wish it would stop very soon it's making me want to vomit.
Much prefer the MN version currently under construction!

Controlling behaviour is abusive - it's a form of emotional abuse.

I don't know how realistic the BDSM part is but there is definitely controlling and possessive behaviour in the book from Christian's character.

YY the MN version is vv funny

I have just realised i am being emotionally abused by my controlling, threatening, demanding, possessive.... pet cat

But she loves me feeding her expensive cat food so it's ok.. isn't it??

Surely if you willingly enter a BDSM relationship you are willing therefore not abused?

not my cup of tea but not all poor wimmen!

Right I am going to dig out the MS of my novella about a woman discovering herself sexually as a dominant and Lulu that. I am doing well enough out of this with the anthology, might as well keep milking it . I am doing everyone a favour...

Anais Nin? Yes. But Brock Norman Brock? Goodness yes. Ex

Anais Nin? Yes. But Brock Norman Brock? Goodness yes. Exotic fine line with erotic. Real words. Real sensations.