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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this mum is BU?

107 replies

Gibbous · 27/06/2012 18:24

www.heraldseries.co.uk/news/9778500.Mother___s_horror_after_daughter___s_near_miss/?ref=mr

OP posts:
AnyoneForTennis · 27/06/2012 18:28

Oh yes, she is BU alright!!

JamieandTheOlympicTorch · 27/06/2012 18:29

Yes, I believe she is.

God knows how she copes with all the roads

CakeBump · 27/06/2012 18:30

Christ her heart must have stopped.

I live in Germany, in a small village with the railway running straight through. There are no fences on the line at any point, except three level crossings within the village.

It panics the life out of me to think the dog might get out one day and wander onto the line, never mind a child. A man walked in front of one of the trains about 4 weeks ago.

I think if previously the child couldn't have got through, she was NBU to think that the fence would be protection enough. She won't make that mistake again...

mumblechum1 · 27/06/2012 18:30

SIBU

squeakytoy · 27/06/2012 18:30

Of course the mother is being ridiculous. She should have had the dog on the lead long before approaching the crossing. She is bloody lucky it wasnt the dog that bolted as she would not have been able to catch him. And she should have had a hold of her child's hand. She should be blaming her own lack of common sense, not the rail company.

whenyouseeitwaveorcheer · 27/06/2012 18:31

I don't think she's BU to make them want to close the gap.

She, of course, is responsible for her own child's safety but if I was in charge of that crossing I'd want to know that this had happened.

That's not to say that I would ever let an unaccompanied child stand next to a level crossing though.

Sparks1 · 27/06/2012 18:31

So what she has admitted to is not having control of her toddler next to both a train line and road.

And felt securing the dog more important than her child.

Abdicating her parental responsibility much....

thisisyesterday · 27/06/2012 18:32

yes of course she is being unreasonable

she did a stupid thing, and only realised the consequences when it was too late, and now instead of admitting it she is looking for someone else to blame.

wonkylegs · 27/06/2012 18:32

She seems to believe that responsibility for her child belongs to anyone but her Angry, stupid!

WorraLiberty · 27/06/2012 18:32

What squeaky said

Stupid woman!

The woman in the story I mean...not squeaky Grin

CakeBump · 27/06/2012 18:34

I think the point is that previously the child couldn't have got through.

I would imagine she takes due care on the roads - why wouldn't she?

CakeBump · 27/06/2012 18:35

Wow, you are all hard hearted!

Never made a mistake? Let your attention wander for a second?

JamieandTheOlympicTorch · 27/06/2012 18:36

CakeBump - you are right. If she had reason to think the child couln't get through, then she'd be more relaxed about letting the child go

I've changed my mind

thisisyesterday · 27/06/2012 18:36

i'm not convinced the child couldn't previously get through though.

there is normally quite a big gap at the bottom and in the middle. and if she had used her eyes instead of assuminng her child couldn't get through maybe she'd have been ok.

Birdsgottafly · 27/06/2012 18:37

If the gaps do not have to be there, i don't see why the rail company shouldn't try to recitfy this, tbh.

There have been unneccesary deaths because of unsafe crossings.

What about a child that has wandered off or is lost?

This isn't just about this individual case, the railway company does have a duty of care.

thisisyesterday · 27/06/2012 18:37

"Never made a mistake? Let your attention wander for a second?"

not with a 2 year old by a railway track no!!!

thisisyesterday · 27/06/2012 18:38

but the fact is they can never make it so no-one can get through at all.

i don't know of any level crossing that doesn't have a gap in the middle between the barriers, and underneath them too. plus a child could climb over.

a lost child could wander on while they're open and get run over.

that's a total red herring. if you have a child next to a railway line you hold onto them, end of story

AnyoneForTennis · 27/06/2012 18:39

She days she thought the child would just stand and watch the trains...., not that she didn't think she could, or would,climb through!!

WorraLiberty · 27/06/2012 18:39

Never made a mistake? Let your attention wander for a second?

Yes, but then I'd take responsibility for it instead of blaming the train company.

No matter how safe it was in the past, only an idiot would let go of a toddlers hand and let them wander over to see the trains alone.

Even the 'safe' fence could have been vandalised for all the woman knew.

Sparks1 · 27/06/2012 18:39

This isn't just about this individual case, the railway company does have a duty of care.

As does a parent. To not be a complete moron.

And then go blaming someone else.

AnyoneForTennis · 27/06/2012 18:40

The railways duty of care? But there will always be danger at these places....always. How about people just 'be aware'?

Original poster
Gibbous · 27/06/2012 18:41

Yep, I've made mistakes, taken my eye off the ball, but no not near a railway track, previous safe crossing or not (I personally don't believe any crossing is 100% child proof or that she didn't know a new crossing had been installed on her road and hadn't noticed it had gaps).

More to the point though if I had I'd be chastising myself, whether the rail company could have done more or not, not laying the blame elsewhere and so publicly.

OP posts:
Birdsgottafly · 27/06/2012 18:42

This has only happened because it has been changed this system after previously being staffed, this is for cost cutting reasons.

The parish council were opposed to the change and according to the article they have expressed concern over the gaps.

It will probably take a death of a child, or dog, over the school summer holidays to change.

JamieandTheOlympicTorch · 27/06/2012 18:43

I think it's the fact that she's doing it so publicly that chafes a bit. Why do that and open yourself up to the kind of bitching we are doing here

Original poster
Gibbous · 27/06/2012 18:44

"but the fact is they can never make it so no-one can get through at all."

Can they? With all the necessary mechanical goings and within sensible
resources?

OP posts: