To think this mum is BU?

[Gibbous]

www.heraldseries.co.uk/news/9778500.Mother___s_horror_after_daughter___s_near_miss/?ref=mr

*Why are they not comparable? Adult in charge taking eyes off their dc. Looks similar to me.

It may not suggest seconds but it's unlikely to be hours.*

Preventing your child from being hit by a train and having your child abducted by someone are not comparable imo.

As for seconds and hours, personally i wouldn't take my eyes off a two year old in close proximity to roads and a train track for a split second. They'd be in a buggy, on reigns or in some other way physically attached to me.

We'll never agree then because I see no actual evidence of an abduction, just an unlocked door, absent parents and a missing child, entirely preventable. A mother who takes her eyes off her child momentarily will never be as unreasonable to me as one who leaves that child alone repeatedly in an unlocked room.

They didn't blame the hotel though did they? Which would be the nearest equivalent to blaming Network Rail for your child running off to squeeze through a barrier.

And you're right they couldn't possibly blame the hotel, which is kinda my point.

My son has autism. Maybe that colours my judgement.

But:

1. NEVER NEVER NEVER leave a child unattended near a train line for a second. NEVER. Can I stress that enough??? You NEVER leave your child.
2. Don't even get me started on how stupid you have to be to leave your child in an unfamiliar, unlocked and unsecured hotel room.

As I said, my DS is about as predictable as the weather these days, so that colours my judgement, but I just cnanot fathom people not noticing thier children wandering onto a train track... I mean... FOR REAL??? YOU DIDN'T notice your 2YO wandering onto a TRAIN TRACK? And, what's worse... you don't want to take responsibility for it????????????????????

What a ridiculous post worrywort; the woman had a lapse of concentration. It happens to the best of us.

If I was responsible for running trains through a built up area I would make bloody sure that the gates were safer.

She is nbu at all

I'm not disagreeing btw, I hate the blame game. I do think though that she is right to point out what happened to her, that these gaps are there for others who may think as she did, that it was safer than that. My dad lost his right foot to a train, his own fault, seven years old playing by the railway. I absolutely know how dangerous they are and would never let go of my child. I still, though, would think the train company need to do more to fill up gaps that ought not to be there.

Does it? It doesn't happen to me.

I don't get to have a lapse of concentration.

As I said, that might colour my judgement.

I have to think ahead in EVERY single situation I'm in.

Even allowing a 2YO to be free near a live train track is, IMHO, stupid behaviour.

She did notice though, as she was bending to put the lead on she noticed the child move to the fence and instantly slip down the gap, which made her grab quickly. She did notice.

worry I wonder how old your son is? Because you may find that, given a few more years you DO have the odd lapse in concentration. It happens, you're human.

And second perfumedlife - she DID notice. The gates aren't safe. She is pointing that out in case the same happens to others and they are not so lucky.

Can't see much wrong in that tbf

Ridiculous post, Zookeeper? I don't think so. Not many of us have a lapse of concentration next to a railway line with a 2 year old on the loose and get away so lightly. And then have the unremitting stupidity to claim it's someone else's fault.

He's 4.

Well bully for you flogging molly; meanwhile in the real world plenty of us have lapses of concentration and I for one am delighted that this woman is sensible enough to bring the unsafe state of the crossing to our attention.

I'm honestly not getting at you worry, but I have a brother with PMLD - exactly the sort of child you'd expect never to be out of your sight...

but it happened, occasionally, that we all as a family had lapses of concentration. He once got out of the back door and ran away (he was about 10), and all of us were out searching for him for ages. God knows what would have happened if there'd been something like a railway crossing in the village as he has absolutely no sense of danger and wouldn't respond to anyone shouting his name.

Or the time we lost him in the supermarket (aged around 12) and ran up and down the aisles and out into the carpark for a heart-stopping few minutes until he was located.

With the best of intentions, it happens. And yes, FWIW I'm sure my DM spent days having nightmares and being paralysed with guilt that she was the worst mother in the world.....

The gates aren't safe.

So what about a station platform? There is no physical barrier there and trains travel at a similar speed through.

Which all leads back to the same thing. It's about the safety behaviour of the parent, not the crossing.

but that's just it Sparks; what's the point of the gate if you can walk through it? I don't think it's unreasonable to assume the gate should bar all people from passing through it.

Well, I don't. I am with him 24/7. The chances of him going to school are reasonably zero because he wouldn't be safe (I should say: DS has a massive IQ so has the ability to cause havoc).

I have to assess every single outing. Every single event.

I'm not saying that this is what all parents do. I am saying that this colours my judgement when I hear 'Oh, I didn't see little precious bottom walking onto a train line' that is all.

but that's just it Sparks; what's the point of the gate if you can walk through it? I don't think it's unreasonable to assume the gate should bar all people from passing through it.

No. The point of the gate is to act as a reasonably practicable physical barrier and warning to responsible adults.

That doesn't include a 2 year old ducking under it. Shops / restaurants are not required to have stair gates are they?

I think it is not unreasonble to expect it to be a practical barrier as opposed to a "reasonably practical" barrier, especially when there are trains thundering by inches away.

But did your DM go to the papers to blame a third party Cake? Because it is that which is the unreasonable aspect.

No she took responsibility.

As mentioned upthread, it's not about the lapse of concentration it's about the blindness to her own contribution.

I do think she is BU. We had the half barriers where I used to live. Oh god, those were scary. Cars and people trying to dodge them. I hate them. There is no way I would have let my child go at all near one, open or closed.

Mind you, I try to avoid them where possible. A result of too many recurring level crossing/train escaping tracks dreams! (What can I say, I'm weird!)

I think it is not unreasonble to expect it to be a practical barrier as opposed to a "reasonably practical" barrier, especially when there are trains thundering by inches away.

So i ask again, why do train platforms not have barriers whatsoever?

because it would be completely impractical

Well, I suppose Sparks if you are standing on a train platform, it's a reasonable expectation for a train to go past, but some level crossings may not be so obvious?

I do remember, years ago, a passenger being asked to keep her puppy on a lead at a station and we were all a bit and then a HST went through... if the dog hadn't been on a lead, he would have been toast. Seriously...

The barriers have to open and close automatically if you want to avoid having someone on 24 hour duty just for the odd parent letting toddler stray moments.

Therefore presumably they can't be solid slabs.

Well, I suppose Sparks if you are standing on a train platform, it's a reasonable expectation for a train to go past, but some level crossings may not be so obvious?

Jesus christ, most if not all have flashing lights, red and white barriers and an audible alarm. If that doesn't raise awareness in a human i don't know what will!