To be annoyed at not being invited, and even more annoyed at dp for not getting why I'm annoyed!!

[03angels]

Ok so here's the story, last saturday dp's sister invited all the 'girls' in family round whilst the men were playing poker. Dp's mum asked of I was going but as I didn't have an invited of dp's sister I didn't want to show up( she's never invited us round, and If we just 'pop' over she keeps us at the door
Anyways, Iv been with dp 10 yrs and last week dp's sis's 'wife' had a dig about me not being family as we weren't married, even though we have kids together
:(
Aibu to be upset, and then pissed off about this?? I was even more annoyed as dp couldn't see why I was upset?! This has lead to all sorts of arguments and now a week on we're still not really speaking, he's annoyed that I'm
Annoyed at him and I'm annoyed he can't see why I'm upset and why he didn't say anything to her!

Sorry for the rant

He's got no fucking business being angry with you. Call the council again and tell them he is refusing to leave and ask what can be done wrt rehousing you. You might be able to force him out - you are not married, the dc will be with you, therefore your need to the house is greater than his.

Can you get to see a solicitor?

Even if you can't get him out straight away, then completely separate all aspects of your life (finances, your will, remove him if he is named as your insurance beneficiary, don't cook or shop or do laundry for him).

He is a prick and in the long run, you will be much better off not being part of his family.

What exactly was he angry with you about? That makes no sense. You were the one who was angry with him about his family excluding you and him ignoring this and accepting it. He had nothing to be angry about. If you really want a separation you have to make it clear his little huff isn't the problem, it's the fact that you think your relationship no longer exists, you neither love him, like him or want to live with him and were relieved not upset when he moved out.
Assuming all this is true of course.

2rebecca - lets assume it is, ok?

Angels - he is angry because he is not longer able to control you. He said he's apologised ('i'm sorry, alright! - is PA behaviour andnotan apology) and he's denying saying it, then he said he was angry and you should have realised how much...

The man is flailing now, doesn't know what he wants/to say, because you are taking control.

If you want him out, you are in a better position to get him out, than he is to stay, IYSWIM

2rebecca he was angry that I was pisswd off at him, he still can't see why I was pissed off

karma council have said as we both own part shares there's nothing I can do unless he's willing to sell his share to me or council

I have spoken to my friend who is a solicitor (but 100s of miles away) and she said unless he's willing to sell I can't force him to go! Council have also said that as me and dds have a roof over our heads theres very little they can do in way of moving me- not that I want to move

I'm sooo pissed off with him- mil is having dds tomorrow night while I go see stone roses with my UNI friends so that will give us him time to think- I'm guna have a bloody good time - I think I deserve it!!

He's being a twat though- had a go ate coz I wanted am going to buy myself a cheap pair of wellies for gig as 'were bloody skint'! This from the man who spent £60 on a football painting- claiming it wasn't for him bit for 'our' house- its horrid, and I love my football.

Again please excuse spelling mistakes- bloody autocorrect on phone

Horrid news about the house. I think you will just have to make it clear that from now on you are leading separate lives - bills split, no joint bank accounts etc. Possibly, he will get pissed off and move out!

I know it's not what you want but could you sell your share back to the council and use it as a deposit elsewhere? It might be the easiest and quickest way to get the fuckwit out of your life.

Meanwhile do as karma says and lead separate lives. Separate bank accounts, bills, cooking/washing for yourselves and your dds.

I'm going to do that ladies, I'm soo grateful for your support as its hard when I havnt got any in rl x

I shud be grateful we weren't married

You may be as well posting on the relationships board too. There are plenty over there who will give you support and advice who may not see it on aibu.

Thanks chaotic x