to think if you want to work in silence, don't go to a coffee shop

[whimsicalname]

I was in a chain coffee shop this morning, across the road from our city museum, waiting with my 2 year old for it to open.

I was drinking my coffee, he sat opposite me eating raisins. Other people were working, or chatting, or reading the paper. You know, doing normal coffee shop stuff.

After a while, the boy gets up to wander around. He's not running, he's not sticky, he's just mingling. He walked towards a man with a laptop. Stood nearby him, and then said hello. Man looked up at me, and said 'do you mind, I'm concentrating here' in a really unpleasant way.

If I'd been with a couple of friends chatting we'd have made a lot more noise but I can't help but feel he probably wouldn't have told us off!

We were across the road from the university library (which has some open access areas) and all of 200m away from the city central library, so plenty of options for quiet. Blimey, he could even have sat in the cathedral for some quiet contemplation.

AIBU or was he?

Things I?ve learned from this thread:

1. It?s never too early to learn that some people are anti-social bastards;

2. Some of those anti-social bastards are social cripples unable to smile at small children and get on with their own lives at the same time;

3. Many of those anti-social bastards occupy public spaces;

4. Many people inexplicably make excuses for them (see 3, as being an anti-social bastard and a parent is not mutually exclusive);

5. Coffee shops are places full of boiling liquids and other lethal hazards that inexplicably have escaped the attention of the dreaded health and safety police;

6. Small children are strange;

7. Said small children never get bored and get down from tables and approach strangers announcing: ?I?ve got a belly button? or ?I went into mummy and daddy?s bedroom last night and they were playing horses?;

8. It is unreasonable for people to be unable to smile and nod goofily at the above;

9. Mummy is unable to shrug helplessly and steer her small child away after the above;

10. Some people are so ashamed that their small children may say or do embarrassing things to the ludicrous extent that they deny the reality that small children do embarrassing things because THEY ARE SMALL CHILDREN AND THAT?S THEIR JOB.

does your kiddie world have candyfloss trees faversham
rivers of chocolate
and thrones for al the wee princes and princesses

Maybe the man is worried about appearing friendly to a child.

Piss off is losing it?

Eh? Thinking 'piss off' is losing it? What?

OP, YANBU

Small child says hello to you, you say hello back and if you don't want further interaction you look back down at your laptop or make yourself look busy.

Children deserve special kindness, especially when they are being polite and friendly themselves.

What a bunch of child-haters on this thread, FFS!

I am community minded but I like it in Spain where people are quite likely to touch

I'd bet if he touched said sticky child in this scenario then we'd have seen and heard more than "piss off" :o.

BTW that is semi serious....

That wasn't called for.No need to get so personal,Missfaversam.

I can't believe we are still talking about this. A man was busy, he didn't want to be bothered by a child. All the mother needs to say is 'come back here, the man is busy' and forget it. Not post on MN - we are even sillier for replying!

MissF you are getting nasty now, and you are preaching to others about politeness?!

Limited (whispers in fear of OPC dislikers...my ds announced to my work colleagues tonight that he had a sticking willy?!?....it's ok though I don't work in a coffee shop)

That really was a low blow.

limited

Limitedperiodonly - abso-bloody-lutely

another standing ovation from me too limited.

What? Who told a toddler to piss off?

What a bunch of child-haters on this thread, FFS!

Yup, we are all parents, with our own kids...

And we really don't give a fuck about yours - especially when we have escaped our for a coffee and a nice sit down.

hth :)

scottish mummy probably pictish

Purpleprickles - yes, it is the job of adults to teach children good manners and how to behave appropriately, but I would argue that it is not good manners to go up to a stranger who is clearly engrossed in something, and interrupt them. And the OP had a responsibility to teach her child this - she could have said, "Yes you can go for a walk but don't bother that man - he looks busy."

What is wrong with children learning that it's not polite to interrupt - not because they are children but because interrupting is rude whatever age you are - or so I was taught.

purple

My DS once said hello to someone on the tube!

No she said that he said what she thought which was "basically, piss off"...that means "in other words" or "to put it another way" or "the polite version of.."

Whatmeworry - so you can't even be polite to a 2 year old????