To kick up a fuss at school tomorrow.

[rmm]

i picked dd1 up at school today, and she has a massive graze on her nose, upper lip, lip and chin. Her left cheek was swollen and she had the beginning of a black eye.

Tbh she looked like she'd been in a brawl.

When I asked her what had happened she got teary and just wanted to go home.
Her regular teacher wasn't around and there was a sub, who is really not a great teacher. When she saw my expression the teacher casually mentioned that there was a note in dd folder, but offered no other explanation

I am really upset. I know that fallings part of growing, and they did applied some ice. But this incident happened very early today (before break from what I gather)

Dd has a massive swelling on her cheek, lip and chin and was in pain for the majority if the day. She's a really strong little girl and doesn't complain easily so didn't make a fuss

The school has a policy not to administer any children's brufen without permission, but they never contacted me to ask if they should give her a dose or if I would like topic her up.

So wibu to go in and complain very loudly to the class teacher? not about the actually falling part, but how they handled the situation after that?
Seeing my little girl's face so badly scraped and swollen and the fact that she was in pain unnecessarily is breaking my heart so my judgement might be a little off.

I disagree. Every bump and scrape doesn't need medicating.

That last post wasn't to you op.

No one ever got called for that sort of thing when I was at school. You had to be vomiting or bad enough to go to A and E to get a call home.

Other than the ibruprofen, what would you have done? They had applied an ice pack and first aid.

I think at 6 she is capable of deciding herself and telling someone. I can't see how you can decide she needs pain medication, can she not decide for herself.
I am speaking as a mum of en extremely clumsy 7 year old that has come home with all sorts of bumps, bruises and a very similar facial injury. Imo they did the right thing.

Worra - she didn't say anything. But the swelling was very obvious. To the point where she couldn't open her lips to eat.

I'm not saying that I blame them for the fall. But I'm upset that I wasn't called and then I could have decided whether to go in and see how bad it was, and at that point whether she needed some calpol or whatever.

She's only 6 - still little enough to deserve some TLC after such a bad fall.

Are all the adults here saying that if they fell, had a bloody nose and grazing to the face and a blalck eye they wouldn't want a little sympathy and maybe something to ease the discomfort a little?

I think YANBU.

Oh dear who said she doesn't deserve sympathy?

Personally i think any injury causing a swollen cheek and black eye and mouth/lip injury should be reported to the parent .She could have damaged her cheek bone .I had a very similar injury at school ,I still have the,admittedly small, scar 40 years later ,my mother was so shocked when she picked me up she nearly fainted (and she's a nurse!).

I don't think 6 year olds are always able to tell whether they need pain relief or whether its normal to feel like this ,they don't want to make a fuss ,the teacher should have noticed her distress.Some of you sound as if you would just hand them the calpol and let them self medicate .

Worra - she didn't say anything. But the swelling was very obvious. To the point where she couldn't open her lips to eat.

So she was either fine with that or scared of the teachers?

If it's the latter, that's what you need to sort out.

Why would a 6yr old (if they were really that bad) not say anything to the staff?

Sd1 thank you.
I think she needed a cuddle and I needed to hold her. I feel the school forget these children are only 6. They are still little.

Dd is so 'grown up' and independent mst f the time that seeing her in tears with a scraped, swollen face broke my heart

Outtilunchagain said what I meant intended

Yes that's what I said of course. I allow dd to tell me if her pain is bad and needs medicating. So I hand her the bottle and let her sip all afternoon. Why do people love to add (quite offensive) bits in to peoples posts.
Imo the school did nothing wrong that's my opinion. End of. Its just as valid as the peoples who think the op is bring reasonable.

I think that post hits the nail on the head. You were upset.
Your dd had been treated, and got her sympathy at the time, and you were notified at the end of the day, but it was a shock to you to see her face damaged. I agree with Worra - if the pupil hasn't said she is in pain, then the school had no reason to call you. They can't administer drugs to pupils anyway, and how would you know from wherever you were, how she was ?

I absolutely would not have said anything to the staff because I would have assumed that if it was obvious (and facial injuries are) and the teacher didn't say anything to me then clearly this was something i was meant to put up with.

All of my boys including the ultra confident youngest would have expected the teacher to make the running in such circumstances .Also facial injuries can make you very shaky and it may have been all she could do to hold it together ,I remember my accident very clearly and I was quite shaky about the whole thing ,I was also very embarrassed .

It's worth remembering too that some children burst into tears when they see their parent's reaction anyway.

I remember grazing my face at school. It stung a bit but I was fine after half an hour or so.

When I saw my Mum at 4pm, I'd actually forgotten about it until I saw the shocked look on her face and then I burst into tears

Yanbu. School should have called you. It's down to the teachers to ascertain how serious it was by looking at the injury, not by how much noise your 6yr old dd made.

But her face wasn't just grazed worra. She was very swollen, had the start of a black eye and her nose had been bleeding after the fall.

A graze doesn't require a call to a parent but a fall down 2 steps that result in this should have warranted a call.

Irrespective of what I felt or needed, I feel very strongly that should a child be hurt in the face, especially on the nose or face or lips, which are prone to greater swelling/ bleeding the parents should be informed.

I don't expect the school to administer any pain relief without my approval. But why not seek my approval? Why leave a child with an injury that is becoming more swollen as the day progresses without informing a parent?
This was not a scraped knee or grazed elbow.

I guess I will be complaining tomorrow, probably a little more calmly then before being on here!

rmm I can totally understand why you are unhappy- of course the staff at school aren't psychic and know if she's in pain etc, but even if she's a tough little thing she's still only 6! You're her mum and the should have called you IMO- just to make you aware. Also did none of them think that she possibly was a bit shaken etc? I'm not saying they should have told you to collect her but would it really hurt just to call? Or the sub teacher be waiting with her at end of schoolday ready to let you know what happened. Don't understand this note in folder rubbish, whats wrong with actually speaking to you.

I hope she's feeling ok now.

It is also worth remembering that a facial injury is actually a head injury and also that a concussed child may not be crying or making a fuss ,less noise may indicate a more serious injury

You missed my point suiledonn1

I'm saying it's worth remembering that kids who feel otherwise ok, can burst into tears when they see the shocked reaction of their parents.

Yy pickledpenny. Exactly.

my dd's school has a policy that every time a child hurt his/her head/face, the parent/carer is called and informed of the circumstance of the accident and the welfare of the child. so OP is not unreasonable in wanting to be kept informed. I have been called a few times during the year for really minor bumps, but at least I am prepared and informed when I collect my child. It is right to raise the issue to see if the school can look into introducing a similar policy. Any decent school should be listening and reassuring and work with parents to resolve their concerns.

Yes absolutely outotlunch. Just because she was quiet and didn't complain doesn't mean she was OK.

IMO - school should have called the OP, even if it was to just let her know about the accident. And they should have absolutely spoken with you at pick-up in the absence of that.

That said at middle I was knocked out cold during a netball match. Didn't even get so much as an ice pack, I walked home alone afterwards, no note, no phone call, nothing.

I doubt there is concussion. I would assume the first aider at least knows how to check for that. As I trust my dds schools first aider, I would be happy with what they decided.
If YOU feel you would like to be informed in future, tell them. Otherwise they will make the decision. It may not be the one you would make, so be clear on what you expect and see if they can accommodate it.