To think that people have the principles they can afford?

[Hullygully]

Do you have, or know anyone that does, principles that would absolutely not be ditched in the event of greater wealth?

The only mutual friend I could sound out is a bit bats and it would all get ever worser.

Oo tell us about it.

'My biggest terriblest mistake has been thinking that if you were all lovely friends you all loved each other and each other's children and rejoiced in triumphs and saddened at setbacks together.'

Nooooo!! Not a terrible mistake at all! This is exactly what life should be like!

Your friend has ishoos. And you are copping for them, from the sound of things.

Yes but not on here. There's not much to say (ha ha) really.

I think principles are only really principles when they are tested. That's when you find out what are genuine principles and what is holier than thou mouthing off.

Tis sad Hully but that was a very naive attitude. I am always shocked at the simmering competitiveness that lies under the skin of some of my dearest friends.

I find it easier to avoid many, many subjects now, and talk to myself instead.

Or you lot

ah<

have now read the thread in full.

Buy yourself a keyboard SHJ and Tufty!

i suffered several months with no 'r' and 'e' and eventually no 't' and only intermittent 'm' and 'p' (making some posts illegible) ....in the end my mum gave me a new machine...then spent £20 on a new keyboard, installed it and proudly told me how well my little machine was doing now somebody had shown it love.

of course peripheral keyboards are even less hassle to change than that...

I also find a vein of competitiveness in many of my friends. And me as well! I don't like it.

In the words of the wise one, Morrissey, we hate it when our friends become successful.

right. Will try to post aboiding use of [] and [] or where appropriate using an alternatibe

bear with us and our shite keyboard please

this thing of lefties being jealous of other peeps' quids is a tired old thing used bt the right to discredit the left. If I look at all the people I know the leftiest are probly the best off and therefore would habe the nnost to lose if all the wealth got redistributed

I don't reckon your friend is jealous of your wealth. She just thinks you're funnier than her, or your kids are nicer, or your arse is better, or you're brainier. She's using this thing of quids/your socialist credentials so she can hae a pop at you and kid herself she's got the nnoral high ground, I reckon

I don't think anyone- well, hardly anyone- is a socialist because they're skint and would like nnore nnoney. That's just a cliche used by nasty peeps who want to aboid paying their taxes, paying their staff a proper wage etc etc

Ya, but not all of us can afford that, can we?

a pillow enu?

what in the na'e of all that's holy is THAT?

Who was it who said, ' every time I hear of a friend doing well, a little bit if me dies...'

I think humans are irrational and contradictory beings- I am a great fan of social psychoanalytic theory - how your unconscious affects you, all those petty jealousies, projections all to protect your ego.

I tell myself I was a SAHM for 6 years for my children, to give them the best start etc etc. deep down I know that I was a SAHM because I gated my job, I was scared of promotion, I was depressed and wanted SN excuse to stop.

I bet I can drink more Cava than ANY of you.

Edgar but it's a laptop. a cheap end one. I had to buy it a new lead last week at £60! One third of it's original price on a lead. I'm thinking of returning the lead and just buying another cheap laptop.

On the subject:

I think i've never had principles that weren't practical, and therefore haven't had to change them when new practicalities arose.

on the main ones mentioned:

private vs State - have always thought i should get my kids the best possible education
public transport vs car - i've thought was a matter of convenience / cost
my quality of life vs starving people - 'the poor are always with us' says JC - i have a duty to give myself one, good life whilst not being Mean (meanness makes you a worse person, and runs counterfactual to giving me a good life).
eco-issues - i have thought should be dealt with if convenient
vegetarian - my vegetarianism has been compromised more by my marriage than any financial consideration. i don't believe in turning down meat that has already been bought.
Luxury goods - i have always liked nice things. paying for nice things may keep more people employed than less nice ones.

in actual fact, sometimes i say i'm doing stuff for financial reasons, but in actual fact, i'm doing it because i want to, like reusable nappies.
I'd still use cloth if i was wealthy, but it would probs be more Blueberries and less in the way of coolababy. it does save money, but now we're better off, i still use cloth. I'd probably pay to have someone launder them professionally though if i was 'wonga'd'

i like walking, therefore claiming i'm doing it for polar bears is crap.
i find charity shops as likely to be a source of nice clothes as anywhere else.

etc etc...

the other thing is if you have a spare USB you can buy a peripheral and plug it in, though this does detract from the usefulness of a laptop...

damn, i repeated 'in actual fact' in that last post. stylistically bad.

Edgar, in actual fact, you lose points for that.

Cor blimey, I posted on this early on yesterday and it has morphed into something much bigger and badder than the op suggested.

I think sometimes even friends of 30 years standing can find themselves with such divergent views that the whole situation becomes unsalvageable, sadly.

Have been skim reading and now have to go and hose ds down in the shower, but did you post anything about the emails?

SHJ, sorry, but I did love your reference to 'iddle class orals' last night.

WRT hullys latterday socialist friend...

you have tried the 'get pissed and have it out' approach.
it didn't work.
i think it is hard to watch other people be well of when you are living in straightened circumstances. but if you are friends you shouldn't allow it to spoil your relationship, and you should just try to avoid those situations that will spike those feelings.

making a virtue of necessity....not attractive. but i suppose whilst you are young and everyone has to buy second-hand, lives rented, doesn't own a car, it is easy to be pleased enough with these things and see them as not just 'fine' but 'right' - as you get older and your friends buy houses, cars, etc....then you will feel like you haven't done well enough in life, even if you may have the same belief in their 'rightness'. that's probably driving this...

of FFS 'be well off'