to think DH could have sorted something for dinner?

[justtryingtodomybest]

I have been away since Friday visiting my sister and got back just before 5pm after a 3 hour drive.

Before I left, I cleaned the house from top to bottom and made sure there was plenty of food in the house for DH.

We don't have any DCs so, when I was away, all he needed to do was look after himself and feed the cat.

I've just asked him what is for dinner and he just shrugged his shoulders. Is it too much to expect him to have bought something in so I don't have to go back out to the shop? I'm tempted to nip out for a takeaway and not get him anything - childish I know!

I conclude that a man so selfish and unkind that he eats all the food and shrugs rudely when asked what the plans are for food that night is not someone you want to raise children with, yes.

How was the house when you came home OP?

Spick and span as you left it for him? Or waiting for your attentions now that you were back to resume skivvy service as usual?

Blimey, AThing, marriage is about compromise you know? Sometimes you both fuck up. You sound hard work to me and I'm not easy going.

God, I didn't realise she'd already married this entitled loser.

Oh well, I guess she'd better just keep doing all the chores and accept that he is going to be fucking useless when they have children.

Ha ha - "entitled loser" - it gets better

So clarify for me, as I have missed it: What kind of a day at work did he have? What kind of a weekend? What was his expression when he shrugged his shoulders and what was the message behind it?

that was for Athing btw who has seen stuff I have missed

'I suppose I thought I was being kind and thoughtful by sorting things out before I went away. But I think that thoughtfulness should work both ways.'

Beautifully put, OP!

YANBU. When I come back after being away, my DP always cooks/defrosts/orders something, without needing to be told, because he's not 5. And yes, it goes both ways. And it doesn't matter if the absent person has been away visiting someone, on holiday, 'down a coalmine' or whatever. The point is food needs to be procured and eaten, and the person at home is usually best placed to do that.

Having said that, I wouldn't clean the house and make sure there was food for DP before I went away. Again, because he's not 5. There is an element of you enabling him here.

Thank you for all your feedback - it's really interesting to hear other people's views.

I didn't mean to drip feed but some of you did pick up on the fact that this was not a one off. So maybe I was being unreasonable in this instance but sometimes it's the little things that tip you over the edge!

And for those of you who asked, we don't have any DCs and don't plan to so no issue there.