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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Cul de sacs are not playgrounds....

173 replies

Bestb411pm · 19/05/2012 17:01

Last bloody forty minutes spent listening to kids bounce a sodding basketball right in the middle of the road. Maybe they're going for some sort of world record?

I've gone from been mildly annoyed to hoping the bloody thing goes through their car window and not mine. I can see why the parents don't want them banging outside their window if they keep them in the back garden, but what are they thinking letting them out to play with a sodding ball in the middle of the road?

AIBU? Really?

OP posts:

DaenerysTargaryen · 19/05/2012 17:18

The problem is, if/when a ball hits your car its quite difficult to figure out a) which child did it and b) which parents are going to pay for the damage.

Olympia2012 · 19/05/2012 17:19

They are more in control of the ball than they would be if they were playing footie with it! ( I think)

Lindax · 19/05/2012 17:19

We purposely chose a cul de sac as its safer for kids with no through traffic & unfortunately there arent many houses in our area with playparks/space alllocated for kids to play out nearby.

YANBU if its a heavy basketball and they are hitting the cars with it and should tell them off.

YAB a bit U complaining about the noise of kids playing during the day, although it can be irritating.

YABU complaining about them playing in the road as the cars drive on it, its a cul de sac with no through traffic so there wont be many cars, all of which should be driving very slowly (as its a dead end/will have kids out).

I always played out when younger and glad ds is doing it now, much better for them than staying in which a lot of kids do now.

5madthings · 19/05/2012 17:21

yabu, sorry but we bought our house EXACTLY because its a very quiet cul de sac, no through traffic and perfect for the kids to play out, our children and all the others in our cul de sac, so 3 from across the road, a few from the flats at the end and 4 from next door, plus mine! all play out and its great.

we all set boundaries ie there is a lampost they cant go past so they dont go near the turn in to the cul de sac (but that road is a 20 mile limit and anyone that does turn in is going very slowly anyway due to the angle)

various parents are often sitting out and i can see the children from my sitting room and kitchen windows.

IF there are a lot of parked cars, i say no ball games, or stay in our front garden rather than in the cul de sac. but the kids have all played out since old enough ie 4-5yrs and they have a great time, its really nice.

I ended up with my neighbours grandchild in my front garden this morning as he wanted to come and play with my dd, he is just visiting for a bit and it was lovely that he could play out, he had a great time on my boys tractor riding about!

i have to say i do worry re noise, i tell my kids not screaching/shouting but they are children and so there will be noise, i wont let them out till 9am on a wkend or bank holiday etc but it is soo nice to be able to let my children play out :)

Whatnamethistime · 19/05/2012 17:22

Try living in mine corner of cul de sac, large drive.

They don't play in street on road, I often wKe up to the sound of them playing on my drive.

5madthings · 19/05/2012 17:23

curiousgeorgie you say that now (and i get the point re sleeping baby but they have to get used to sleeping through noise particularly when they have siblings, ihave had to deal with that many times!) but when your dd is older you would probably love to live somewhere she can play out.

and the children should move when you park the car, mine and all the other kids all move out the way, tho its not that often a car comes to park or goes out tbh.

TheMonster · 19/05/2012 17:26

We used to live in a cul de sac and the sound of a ball bouncing for hours would drive me mad. We now live on a through-road. Much better.

JugglingWithTangentialOranges · 19/05/2012 17:26

I'm glad we live in a cul-de-sac and that my DCs have a chance to play and make friends with other children in our road.

But I do worry about them all with the cars around. Sometimes they aren't very aware of me coming in or out of my drive for instance. So, I guess it's just down to me to be really aware of them.

It's very tricky though, what with the cats and kittens liking to sleep under the car too etc. etc. And the kids next door coming out of their house and straight behind my car either on foot or bike.

You're right that a cul-de-sac is not a playground, but it's not a racing track either !

Live and let live - and hopefully no accidents.

5madthings · 19/05/2012 17:27

kids can be careful when playing with balls, if they hit your car i can see you point we have a basketball and it gets played wiht out the front, tho not today so you arent my neighbour

the kids throw it from one side to the other trying to get it to hit the kerb bounce back across the road, i played the same game as a child we called it 'kerby' not sure what my children call it tho :)

and yes there is a park nearby ish but i dont always have the time or even want to take them there, if they play out front i can get on with stuff in the house, my littlest one can have a nap etc.

Original poster

Bestb411pm · 19/05/2012 17:27

Although it wasn't my original point I do think it's interesting that people think cul de sacs are safe, generally they are but they still have different rules to a park and a road, they're somewhere In between aren't they?

I'll say it again but usually the kids been out doesn't bother me, and fwiw it looks like a proper basketball to me and I wouldn't allow it to be played with in the street never mind the middle of the road.

In happier news dp has taken the car out now so I can stop twitching About it

OP posts:

PoppyWearer · 19/05/2012 17:28

YABU. I grew up in a cul-de-sac, we played out all the time and it was wonderful.

We now live in a cul-de-sac and some of the kids (mine are too little as yet) do play out in the road. I think it's fab, one major reason why we bought here, and even the older neighbours like it too (yes, really) because it's exactly what their DCs did growing up.

SecretSquirrels · 19/05/2012 17:28

Better than indoors in front of a screen.
We live in a cul de sac of 5 houses and when DCs were little it was wonderful to see all the neighbouring kids playing out there. They would play in the road or in our garden or a neighbours.

Hulababy · 19/05/2012 17:28

We also love on a cul de sac and it is great for children. Round here all the children from our street play out when it is nice. There are no pavements on our culdesac so they have to play on the street. Most people park on their drive though and we don't have cars parked on the roadside apart from in a couple of marked bays. But they have balls out, scooters, bikes, go karts, etc.
TBH I think it is to be expected, esp in the spring/summer months where it is lighter and the weather (usually) a bit nicer.

PoppyWearer · 19/05/2012 17:29

We used to play Kerby too.

QuintessentialShadows · 19/05/2012 17:31

Tie them up and throw them in the basement, or even better, ask them to go watch tv and stuff their faces with crips and coca cola

Original poster

Bestb411pm · 19/05/2012 17:33

Should I give them the crisps and cola or just the money to go down the shops themselves?

OP posts:

5madthings · 19/05/2012 17:37

there are 4 houses on each side of our cul de sac and then at the 'dead end' of the cul de sac there are flats, four at the bottom and four at the top, i think have never counted, plenty of children to play out! some old people etc as well, its a mix of council owned and bought (think nearly all the houses have been bought) but often an old man that lives on a house on the corner sits out in the sunshine and the kids wave to him etc.

incidentally and its a small point but one the children in our cul de sac has sn and as such goes to a sn school and he plays out as well and its great to see that actually the children all just treat him the same, they all share sweets, swop toys and play, he lives with his mum and gma and they have said how nice it is for him to be able to play out in a safe environment and just do normal child things (he is often poorly and misses out etc)

Noqontrol · 19/05/2012 17:37

I'd love to live in a cul de sac for that very reason. We live on a busy bus route so no chance of that unless the kids fancy playing chicken with the cars. I'll swap houses with ya op

EndoplasmicReticulum · 19/05/2012 17:37

I remember my dad giving some fatherly advice when husband and I bought our first house.

It was - "never live on a cul-de-sac because kids will play outside your house all the time".

It's like the people who buy near to a primary school and then complain about school-run cars.

Sparklingbrook · 19/05/2012 17:40

I got my DSs a sponge football so that it wouldn't annoy people. We live in a cul de sac, but unfortunately there is a miserable git down the road who likes to come out and have a go at the kids every 5 minutes for being too loud.

Silent football.

letasongcarryyoualong · 19/05/2012 17:42

I have to admit, when we lived on a cul de sac the noise in the summer evenings could be terrible and really disturbing. I never said anything and yes I can understand children want to play out but in our defence, we were young and childless at the time and never really thought about the "children will play out" part. It really was very noisy and I don't think living in a cul de sac necessarily equates to having to put up with ball bouncing or (in our case) constant shrieks, squeals and yelling.

The children also went through a phase of knocking on doors asking if there were any jobs we wanted doing which got intrusive after three or four times a day.

RubyGates · 19/05/2012 17:44

Really? I'll just nip out and tell all the children playing out there now to get indoors and stop enjoying themselves.

Children these days eh!

Ilovedaintynuts · 19/05/2012 17:46

I hate people who are intolerant to kids playing outside. So hard living in an urban area with kids who want to exert some energy.
Unclench.

GnomeDePlume · 19/05/2012 17:46

YANBU

Neighbour used to push her DCs out to play football in the road. Of course they were sent to the end so that they didnt disturb her just everyone else. I perfected the art of yelling at them when they insisted on playing on other people's drives and front gardens. We have now quite deliberately put prickly plants in our front garden to keep the sods off!

If I had wanted to own a playground I would have bought one.

They are roads. DD1 is the lucky to be living proof of that after she stepped in front of a car without looking. As it was slow speed DD1 got away with an injured knee and a broken foot.

In the battle between heavy metal object and squidgy organic object the squidgy organic one will always come off worst.

slatternlymother · 19/05/2012 17:48

Does my head in. The kids who used to do it have moved now, but they always used to play football right away from their own parents cars, but near all of ours. It bounced off loads of times, and finally ended up breaking a wing mirror on my neighbour's car

We live in quite large townhouses, behind an electric gate so I can see why their parents were keen for them to play there; it's safe. But there is a HUGE playing field 2 minutes away, and we live in Cornwall. Where nothing ever happens. Surely they'd be better off there? It's got proper goals there, and a mini pitch for a kick around with smaller groups.

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