how can i help my daughter get over her aversion to open mouth chewers? (blatantly not an AIBU!)

[bejeezus]

7 yo dd has come home, more often than not recently, with her packed lunch barely nibbled. She complains that if she sits next to someone, who eats with their mouth open, it makes her feel sick and she cant eat her dinner!

Nobody likes it much do they, but what can you do? Ive told her to just look in the other direction, but she said once shes seen/heard it, her stomach is turned and she cant eat.

Shes inherited this bloody fussiness off her dad im gutsy and NOTHING puts me off my food

there is not much to her and her appetite is not good at the best of times. She really cant afford not to eat from breakfast until tea time.

Loads of kids eat with their mouth open; what can i do?

And also public tooth picking makes me heave. Please don't do it while I'm eating my lunch

Oh Grockle My MIL DOES IT! I think it's DISGUSTNG! I was pleased to hear that some restaurants have banned toothpicks as health hazard! GOOD! Gross habit.

Oh, loads of advice, thanks! On my way in and out so will come back and read properly in a bit

OP go here www.misophonia-uk.org/,

Oh, loads of advice, thanks! On my way in and out so will come back and read properly in a bit

My ds is doing this now, its driving me nuts, everytime we sit down to a meal, the harping screaming banshee of a mother me is shouting crazy mental stuff at him, you would have though that after months and mouth of me being a loon would have helped him, but nope every night I have to tell him to close his mouth and stop smacking in my lug hole...

OP if she cannot stomach it, id ask for to be put somewhere on her own at meal times, as a child should not be going all that length with no meals.

DS has this issue - thought he was the only one. We tried all sorts of options but he will not eat in the school dining hall with others. However if he doesn't take a lunchbox in with him he gets into trouble and the school phone me even tho we have gone over this loads of times. Now he takes a lunch box (empty) so is allowed into the dining room where he sits for a few minutes then just goes out into the playground! He doesn't eat from breakfast to tea-time and has done this for several years now and seems to be hale and hearty. he is built like a brick shit-house anyway, and if he has a hearty breakfast and then is home at 3.30 I don't think he's going to starve. He is 10, by the way.

Oh for goodness sake, I knew it would not be long before someone leapt to the defence of the open mouthed eaters. Now doubt we need to be told they might have SNs as well. How predictable. Of course if anyone is clearly having a problem eating in a 'normal' way due to disability or illness then people should show tolerance and understanding of that, but the vast majority of noisy sloppy eaters are just bad mannered and lazy. And if you know your child has an adenoidal problem or whatever then get it dealt with and in the meantime train them to cover their mouths with their hand when they eat.

I always find it quite bizarre that is is socially acceptable to toothpick at the table, as well.

Read the misophonia link. I suffer from this .

I can assure anyone my son is not lazy or bad mannered, he just does not know how to do it, without getting harped at, hes only just turned 6, and is extremely well behaved, and has excellent manners otherwise.

Oh Hilly....how silly and old fashioned you sound. Of COURSE it's not ok! BUT some understanding is preferable and kids who find eating with mouth shut dificult should NOT be called disgusting!

I hate seeing it myself...but it's not nice to call people disgusting.

Some of the comments about "disgusting" people are a bit . These are infant school children.

Sounds like your Dd has a phobia if she is so disgusted by this that she can't actually eat.

Tell her to move to the teachers'
table

I've had a quick check back and I might have missed it but I haven't seen anyone call a child disgusting.

I've seen people saying eating with your mouth open is disgusting though

And that's because it is.

I've been through stages of having a big issue with this - possibly hormonally linked, I got quite stabby - but it did go away.

I suggest you talk to the school about a) an assembly on the subject of table manners so if she asks her table mates to eat with their mouth closed they at least understand the concept and b) (because lets face it no primary school will be able to eliminate this) finding a more acceptable place for her to eat corner table facing the wall wirh carefully selected childen eg - not in a separate room if at all possible). The problem with b) is that if it's made too much of it might entrench a problem that she would otherwise grow out of.

Ds2 has a terrible gag reflex and regularly vomits at lunchtime because of kids eating with their mouth open.

I don't care how old they are,they can eat with their mouth closed,its not nice at all. None of mine do it,not even my 4 year old.

I have no idea how to tackle it,he just has to come up with his own coping mechanism at the lunch table and he seems to be doing ok this term.

There is a kid in his class who always has a snotty nose......that makes him gag too.He has a very sensitive stomach!

I'm with your dd on this, it's bleddy disgusting.

Oh I do love the "None of mine do it,not even my 4 year old" well done you, your children are wonderful and amazing. gold claps!

Funnily my 2 year old doesn't do it, and neither did my 6 year old till he started full time school, but hey, "none of mine did it either, but do now!!!.

Unless I take a 6 year olds food who as it happens is diabetic, which will never happen as him missing a meal would be detrimental to his health-- all I can do is continue to be a banshee mother.

I agree that for some children it does not come naturally and it a skill that may need to be learned, but in order for it to be learned it needs to be taught. When I said people were bad mannered and lazy I was not really talking about very young children particularly, but if people do not bother drumming it into children because they are little and it doesn't really matter, then they will grow into those lazy bad mannered sloppy adults. I am constantly nagging one of my DC for this as well, and he is much older than 7, so I realise it I not always for lack of trying. I just don't think we should be excusing it - at any age. If they think they have an excuse they won't try to get it right and it's something that will really blight them through life.

Hilly it drives me blooming nuts, if I could id stick a knife in his mouth

definitely not excusing it, hate it, loathe it actually, just hate the assumption that because someones child can do it, everyone else's can, stoopid and narrow minded way of thinking.

Blimey unclench.

I didnt say they were wonderful and amazing,my 4 year can eat with his mouth closed though.He has had no choice because of ds2 vomming at every mealtime when he used to smack his chops like a washing machine.

boke

Get her moved from the vile child.

My dd was sat next to a child who picked her nose and chewed it, I told teacher to move her and problem over.

We had a play date recently and the well mannered, polite mum made some gorgeous pizza for us. Then her dd and ds sat down my god! Reached across dd and I like beasts lunching at the food, bits of cheese ham and veg flying out of their mouths, the noises like a zoo . Dd turned to me and said she wanted to go home it was REVOLTING.

What I can't understand is how the mother let her children do this without one reproach.

thebody read the thread...this is about lunchtime. They don't sit in the same places. Also...your attitude is why I am nervous of other Mums at times.

Cheesy look for a kids Yoga class..breath control is amazing and she'll learn to chew whilst breathing out.

My BIL is a terrible eater, gurning, open mouthed chomping, lip smacking and om-nom-nomming. When it's time to sit at the dinner table my DH and I practically rugby tackle one another out of the way in an attempt to sit as far away from him as possible.