to be totally sick of HV telling me i HAVE to do things

[lola88]

seriously this woman is driving me mad she spends all her time telling me i HAVE to do this and i'm NOT ALLOWED to do that.

So far i'm not allowed to put ds in his own room til 6 months not allowed to wean him before 17 weeks and should not being doin til 6 months anyway, i'm not allowed to leave him on changing table, i'm not allowed to put him in a baby walker.

I have to chuck away all my bottles and sterilisor because he had thrush, I have to stay with him while he sleeps, i have to get 4 stairs gates (when i only need 2 really) i have to get a fire guard.

I did say to her my understanding is these are guidelines not rules or laws she said guidelines are there to be followed! She is so pushy feel like telling her i'll do what i like and to bugger off! I do follow most of the guidelines but object to some woman telling me what i can and can't do with my own child!

I think 85% of what she's told you is completely accurate. And an not sure why you would be so angry about it.

Maybe she just had the wrong tone of voice?

Thats nothing

HV (after peering around room) "have you just moved in?"

Me : Yes

HV "You can tell"

thanks we had been there two months and I thought we were pretty up together!

I have a baby walker OP and a door bouncer. My DS loves them

LST - I'm sure he does love them but the walker isn't good for his safety or development. I believe they were actually banned in Canada.

His development is just fine thank you and as for safety? I'm not rolling him down the stairs in it.

Well, it's a good job LST doesn't live in Canada then. They aren't banned here.

Hv told me 'Only People in big cities like London really do BLW, (I live in quite a rural area) I don't know anything about it and don't have any leaflets I can give you, you're better off doing purees' When I asked her for some Blw advice : /

No I live in the UK and they are not banned here so I don't see why me not living in Canada even comes into it

Anyah no it's GUIDLINES not law!!

In 1989 when my first ds was born guidelines were for putting all. babies to sleep on their tummies.

I weaned my older ones at 3 months as per guidelines then, fine strapping lads btw.

So forgive me for thinking most so called child care gurus are a pile of poo

And remember you don't have to let her into your house or go to clinics, it's all for you to take or leave, after dc2 I left, managed to wean and raise 2 younger ones without any complicated advice.

The attitude towards HVs makes me

i am a student HV, have done a 3 year nursing degree, followed by 4 years in ITU, now on a full time post grad course which i will convert to a masters degree.

Why would you slag off an entire profession based on your experience with one or two practitioners.
Ive seen some really shit doctors in my time but i dont think theyre all like that!

Out of interest, did anyone sit next to a napping baby for the first 6 months??!

mosschops30, what is your opinion on a HV who "spends all her time telling me i HAVE to do this and i'm NOT ALLOWED to do that." ?

Well hats off, and I mean that completely non sarcastically! If mine are asleep in the house, az opposed to the buggy, then it's time to get stuff done, don't know how anyone else functions otherwise!
Mind you I have twins so I've often wondered if they hear each other breathing..

It all sounds like good advice (not sure about the staying with them whilst they sleep??? what does that mean??).

In an ideal world all those things are good things to follow - surely you don't think its ok not to have stair gates or leave a baby on a changing top? My friends 2 month old was left alone whilst my friend ran the bath and she came back in just as she was rolling off it (rolling for the 1st time ever) - very lucky. I couldn't have mine sleeping with me as once they were out of the moses basket there was no space for a cot in our room. No harm came to them in their own rooms. I would have followed the advice if I could have though.

Weaning is advised at 6 months but most HV still will give individual advice, I was recommended to wean DS1 at 16 weeks by my HV even though the guidelines were 6 months, he was on 3 meals a day very quickly as he needed it and she guided me to the right foods etc. It worked perfectly for him but with DS2 he was over 5 months and he had tiny amounts of food for a couple of weeks and that worked for him.

I must say I am all for parents making their own choices but there are certain things you really should listen to, especially with regards to safety.

I have no idea what your problem is TBH.