AIBU to be shocked by these American views on women's bodily autonomy?

[WhatTheHellJustHappened]

If you have time, please read this thread.

boards.askmen.com/showthread.php?130715-Then-End-of-a-relationship-before-and-after-an-Abortion&p=1311666#post1311666

The OP is a boy who regrets not supporting his girlfriend through her abortion.

The thread turns into an abortion debate around page two. There is one female poster making very valid agreements about a woman's right to make choices about her own body and is being flamed by the others.

One male poster actually says "So fucking what if it's her body?"
The worst part is that the women themselves are not speaking in support of a woman's right to choose:(

There are repeated references to how depressed men feel when their SO aborts, but nobody stops to think about how women feel when they are forced to give birth and endure 37-42 weeks of pregnancy. I completely sympathise with men who may feel helpless in such a scenario but I can't really support the idea of a man being able to prevent a woman from terminating a pregnancy.

I'm all for couples making decisions together, but surely the final decision about an abortion should lie with the woman?

TheHouse slightly off-topic - how on earth do you check your cervix? I don't think I'm that bendy!

Sorry, mant to say, Condoms split therefore pregnancy. Women get the right to terminate because it is unplanned etc. however if they decide not to then what about the guy's choice to 'terminate' the relationship with that child as such.

The people who think a ruling like that would actually STOP women from aborting are naive in the extreme. Backstreet abortionists would be raking it in and women and girls would die in their thousands.

whackamole well mine is inverted so perhaps is easier....you just...ahem, stick your finger up there and feel! it's firm and kind of like the tip of a nose. You can feel if it's soft and open or firm and closed.

Right up to the knuckle! And it's towards the back iykwim. Well mine is anyway...as though I am going for my spine.

crispy yes condoms DO split and yes pills fail....in that case wear two and get a fucking life. PLUS...if a man so against having a child, then he needs to keep his bits in his pants. His right to sex does NOT trump a womans right to decide if she wants a baby.

But House he has equal rights whether or not he wants to keep that baby. Is the woman aborts that's her choice but if she decides to keep it then it's her responsibility if he has made it clear he doesn't want it.

I'm not disputing the fact the woman has the right to the abortion but just that a guy has some rights too if the choice to terminate isn't taken.

You are so not wrong TheHouse.

CrispyCod I believe (although I am hazy on the details) that a man can give up parental rights and responsibilities and then therefore doesn't have to provide child support?

I will Google now to check as I really don't know if this is the case.

Is that the case in the USA whack

No it's not Ccrispy because he has a choice whether or not to have sex in the first place. If he does not want a baby, then he does not have to have sex. Just like a woman.

If another person gains control over someone elses body, then that is a very slippery slope. What about cases of abuse? A man may have a violent hold over a woman....rape her, get her pregnant, then tell the court she's a liar and he wants his baby. There is FAR too much abuse possible to ever allow someone else the right to force a woman to carry a baby.

x posts.

House - you're missing my point. I'm not disputing the right of a woman to terminate the pregnancy.

Yes, women have to keep their legs shut if they are so sure they don't want a baby, so men should be the same surely?

I do believe a man who a woman is in a relationship with should be allowed to have an opinion but ultimately this should not have an deciding influence on the outcome.

I can't imagine had I got pregnant unexpectedly with a partner I loved that I would not have sought his thoughts and opinions.

CrispyCod Not sure how correct this is. Article about giving up parental rights.

In some cases, a father might continue to be held responsible for financially supporting his biological child even after he gives up his paternal rights. For example, if the mother must seek governmental assistance in order to support the child, a judge has the authority to terminate parental rights. He can still require the father to pay child support until the child reaches adulthood. This results in the father still being financially responsible for the child without having any visitation rights or say in how the child is raised.

So no, he doesn't get a choice.

Oh, was that from the same page? Should've read it a bit more thoroughly!

He does not get a choice because he already HAS one! If he does not want child with a woman then he should not have sex with her...there is an inherent risk for all parties. A woman may have an unwanted pregnancy...a man may Father a baby.

Neither he should. If he didn't want to be a woman pregnant no one stopped him having a vasectomy before he started spreading his oats.

Or....no vasectomy...no sex. It's simple. If he feels that strongly about his rights...he can manage his own sperm perfectly well.

A woman must have autonomy over her body; we are not the property of others, we are not incubators.

I've been talking to my fb friends about the pending legislation that worries them the most, and some that were proposed but struck down, these are some of them:-

In South Dakota, politicians proposed a bill that could make it legal to murder a doctor who provides abortion care.

A state legislator in Georgia wants to change the legal term for victims of rape, stalking, and domestic violence to "accuser." But victims of other less gendered crimes, like burglary, would remain "victims."

In Congress, Republicans have a bill that would let hospitals allow a woman to die rather than perform an abortion necessary to save her life.

Texas has passed a forced ultrasound bill, so that any woman who seeks an abortion must have an internal ultrasound.

blogs.alternet.org/speakeasy/2012/03/08/forced-ultrasound-informed-consent-and-womens-health-in-texas-the-sad-state-of-the-state/

The texas law is for a vaginal ultrasound!!

If he didn't want to be a woman pregnant no one stopped him having a vasectomy before he started spreading his oats

That is a ridiculous statement. You could say the same about the woman.

It cuts both ways, if both consenting adults have sex they run the risk of pregnancy. BOTH should have equal rights to at some point terminate themselves from the pregnancy.

All the states considering it are legislating for a vaginal ultrasound. Apparently if you need an abortion, a probe up the vagine must mean little to the woman concerned

CCod - yes you could say the same thing about the woman - and I agree, there should be a way to terminate parental rights completely.

Don't forget though, an unwanted pregnancy means that it's the woman that's pregnant, and I can't see how any decent man would FORCE the woman into being his incubator (without rights of her own)