to think this is amongst the most socially awkward things you could say during a vaginal exam?

[RevoltingPeasant]

So I went for a VE today at a hospital clinic.

The dr doing it was quite weird from the start. I was actually going because I am a bit concerned about my pelvic floor but she concentrated mostly on DP's erectile dysfunction and announced that I am in 'psycho-sexual crisis' (hadn't noticed myself ).

Apparently I am 'suffering inwardly' ( ).

She also filled in the tick box form herself, answering most of the Qs herself, like, 'Have you ever received medical treatment abroad, let's put 'no'....' - I have as I have lived abroad most of my life!

But the oddest thing was during the exam, she said, 'I can't see anything wrong with your pelvic floor, normally it gets damaged through instrumental deliveries or multiple pregnancies. You know, like those African women, they have 6, 7, 8 babies - their pelvic floors are all screwed up.'

I would've quite liked to have marched out in a dignified fashion but she had her hand up my vadge.

AIBU to think this is incredibly weird?

Eye - she was probably sizing up your stalactites. Ooo er!

When I was pg I was having an internal with the consultant and his student when he announced "evidence of orgasm you'll see"

I could have died. I was single which he
Had asked about before so it was obvious it must have been of my own doing. But really, I hadn't! I was in no mood for that!

I still wish I'd proclaimed my innocence or jumped up shouting " you Sir are a pervert!" in a disgusted manor!

Bobbly - I think the most inappropriate thing would be to wait till they've just inserted finger and then say cheerily, 'You won't be getting that back!'

No bats thank goodness!

Charlie, was he claiming you had just been getting yourself off? Er Not sure quite what I'd say!

Probably the ladylike thing is, 'Thank you, it was lovely' in your demurest voice.

Are you sure it wasn't David Walliams dressed up as a doctor? Something about the way you described the form filling in 'we'll put no" made me think it was straight out of Little Britain!

I don't think he meant there and then..... Or at least I didn't think that until now!!

I think he was just saying I'd had a recent orgasm. Exactly how different it looks to normal discharge I'll never know.

Charlie I love your name.

As you were everyone

The anaesthetist from the birth of my DS moved in over the road and her DH is friends with mine (they used to work together) so we socialise sometimes. Still can't get over that she's seen me in full technicolour glory, so I've never really relaxed talking to her. Still I should be grateful it's only a neighbour as of DH's best mates offered to deliver my baby (he's an obstetrician) , a kind offer I swiftly refused....

debka why thank you :)

I had a colposcopy recently! I was tilted, fanjo up, with legs akimbo, and the doctor was siting down there wearing binoculars. He kept bobbing down for a look and then surfacing to ask me things. I was getting more and more giggly, and had to try very hard not to ask the doctor if there was any sign of DPs car keys!

Saggy DP and I have this incredibly juvenile joke whereby when anything goes missing he pretends I have hidden it up my fanjo.

Yes, it's just like a Benny Hill sketch in here.........

Dolly you took the words right out of my mouth.