To let 10 year old DS have a knife ?

[JugglingWithTangentialOranges]

Well it would be a present from his DGPa and a penknife but I'm still not sure ...

DS was given the "Dangerous book for boys" by DGPa for his last birthday. He's really getting into it and has made a bit of a den at the bottom of the garden between some hazelnut trees - which he and DD are always climbing. In the Easter hols he made a great periscope with Grandpa using the plans in the book.

Trouble is on page one it has a list of essential things to own and these include a penknife. Now, I can see the attraction of owning such a clever and nifty little gadget with say 20 different tools and a hundred different uses.

But would it be asking for trouble ? You hear so much about the dangers of knife crime especially amongst teenage boys - and also I'm sure you could easily do yourself some accidental damage even if using it was kept to the den and at home.

DS is very keen to ask for one from DGPa for his next birthday. And DGPa is almost as keen to get him one WWYD ?

When you know he can be trusted with it I would see no issue with that. Just make if clear you will be nipping in to see him and if you find him misusing it or not there then you will take it off him

Do any of us really supervise our children all of the time [or is it just me that is lazy]?? We do not need to supervise just because you are there with him will not stop him cutting himself [not saying he will but..]

I think it's ok but as others have said, keep it on a high shelf, he needs to ask if he wants to use it and it never leaves the house (other than the back garden...) unless a Parent/Grandparent is with him.

Explain to him upfront that he will NEVER be allowed to take it from the house to show his friends, however much he boasts about having one!

I would let mine have one, but TBH I don't think he'd need to have one. I was bought up in a village, made a lot of camps and stuff. I had a swiss army knife. We live in a town now and I don't think kids are let out to play. The only evidence I see is graffiti and broken glass in the playground. I don't think I'd be supplying a knife for that.

Thanks for all contributions so far - they've been very helpful and make me feel much better that I will probably say "yes" (Small(ish) boys can be very pursuasive !)

Your experiences will also hopefully contribute to keeping DS safe in his penknife explorations

It's a great idea as long as the rules are consistent and understood. There's lots of fun to be had from creating things from wood so I wouldn't be too worried, but adults in charge have to be responsible and make sure things are kept safe.

But there should be boundaries about where the knife is allowed. Fine for a craft activity but use it outside of that and it has the potential to be considered as a weapon, depending on what's being done with it. I know of one woodcraft group where children were allowed to take their knives away from the work space and one child was threatened by others while they were playing.

Any benign object can become a weapon if it's used with that intent. My dvd player is for watching films but I can guarantee I'd be in bother if I chose to beat you about the head with it. It's not the object that's the problem but what people do with it that matters.

I got blasted on a thread I started about knives

DS has been a Cub/Scout and now Explorer, he's also a Sea Cadet, oh he's 14 by the way.

We live in London and his dad lives in Macclesfield, so his dad bought him one to use there in the woods when out with him and as, like I say we live in London so saw no need for him to have one here.

The Scouting establishment has never asked them to have one nor has
Sea Cadets but due to all the other boys/girls having one I relented. I got him the recommended round tipped DOE knife, It's still very sharp on the one side. We also discussed at length where and when to use it etc.

For his birthday he wanted the Bear Grylls survival pack, I knew it had a knife but since we'd had no incidents regarding the other knife I purchased it. The knife in there was far more sinister looking almost scalpel like and DS LOVED it! Hmmm.

Now my son is a sensible, lovely mild tempered chilled boy whom I have had no issues with BUT he lied to me the other day and took it to school to "show" his mates.

I was mortified, all manner of things could have happened, the least being exclusion from school!

Guess what I'm trying to say is my advice would be MAKE SURE YOU KEEP HOLD OF IT and only hand it over when appropriate.

Peer pressure etc. is a very strong force during their teen years.

We went on a Survival day in woods last summer and were shown and tried out ways to make shelters and fires and I think this may have made a big impression on DS (as well as the book from Grandpa)

If I were getting a pocket knife for s 10 year old, I'd but this.

Streaky that so funny I will never look at my DVD player in the same way !!

Thanks MissFaversham - I guess I was thinking I might let him keep it in his box with his other kit (book, periscope, catapault etc ) - but maybe a top shelf and he has to ask for it for a specific reason is a better/ safer idea ?
I'm not sure on that one either ?

I like that one NarkedPuffin linked to - I didn't know you could get them with such blunt tips.

I got ds a Swiss Army knife for his 10th birthday - even got it engraved for him as to my mind it is almost a coming of age thing. He doesn't use it much - has whittled sticks with it and messed about with teh screw driver bit but certainly hasn't taken it to school or boasted to his friends about it (he was well warned).

Im glad you're thinking along those lines Juggling, It's sad to think we cannot trust our children explicitly BUT like I said temptation and other forces out there are stronger than we would like to acknowledge

I agree with the high shelf so he has to ask. High shelf so younger siblings can't get it,bof course, but if it he's trusted to have it at all, he should be trusted to have it properly.

you're not allowed to buy a knife if you're under 18.

you may use one.

that rule also stands for kitchen knives, and a lot of shops won't even sell a dining knife to a minor.

i'm in favour.
you know to teach him how to use it safely, and to make sure always has to ask to use it.

you must teach children to use tools responsibly as children, because if they're sheltered from it, they will not want to learn the rules when they grow up.

maybe make a proper laminated list of rules, that are kept in a visible place?

Not quite sure from that whether you're for or against keeping it on high shelf seeker BTW - no younger sibs to take into consideration. Just an older DD (13) that he does occasionally have a major scrap with (usually short lived), but they don't hate each other generally

< worries >

keep it in a box of his stuff I say and nickel you being serious ??

I had one at about the age of 8 and so did my brothers. We were bought Swiss Army Knives. No accidents other than a couple of cut fingers. If DD wants one then she will be allowed one, with caveats and strict rules.

You should definitely keep it on a high shelf for a couple of reasons

1. You'll always know when he's using it.

1. You can make sure he gives it back when he's finished so he doesn't accidentally go out with it in his pocket (the Police hear that one all the time)

1. You may/may not let him have it when he's got a friend with him.

It's fine. I had one at 10. DS had one at 10. Give a lecture about safe usage and set out rules about not taking it to school etc

When my dcs got their knives (at 11, once they'd been in Scouts 6 months), we used to 'look after them' for them, and only issued them when they needed them for some reason.
Agree with most who say it's about knowing your own child and teaching them "the rules".

I live in an area of high knife crime
My boys are the demographic for being victims for knife crime blardy blardly
BUT I still think YANBU.

The more of us who can challenge the sole use of a knife being a weapon the better.

Knives are useful objects. They are not like guns that are only really for two things, sport and killing stuff.

I would drum into him very very very strongly - DO NOT TAKE IT OUTSIDE.

The penalties for carrying a knife are high, will get higher and there is an awful lot of hysteria about child criminals.

You dont want him being pulled with a knife and a horrible rollacoaster ensuing.