To let 10 year old DS have a knife ?

[JugglingWithTangentialOranges]

Well it would be a present from his DGPa and a penknife but I'm still not sure ...

DS was given the "Dangerous book for boys" by DGPa for his last birthday. He's really getting into it and has made a bit of a den at the bottom of the garden between some hazelnut trees - which he and DD are always climbing. In the Easter hols he made a great periscope with Grandpa using the plans in the book.

Trouble is on page one it has a list of essential things to own and these include a penknife. Now, I can see the attraction of owning such a clever and nifty little gadget with say 20 different tools and a hundred different uses.

But would it be asking for trouble ? You hear so much about the dangers of knife crime especially amongst teenage boys - and also I'm sure you could easily do yourself some accidental damage even if using it was kept to the den and at home.

DS is very keen to ask for one from DGPa for his next birthday. And DGPa is almost as keen to get him one WWYD ?

For goodness sake let him have one. We all had penknifes from an early age around 7-8. Some of us even had sheath knifes which were great for cutting sticks etc. We used to build dens, make arrows for our home made bows etc. None of us ever stabbed anyone with them or had serious accidents either.

Granted knife laws have changed and you are limited to blades of 3.5 inches or less (IIRC) but this is fine for the vast majority of penknives that your DS would want.

My 7yo has a knife, for woodcarving, so do my 10 and 12 yos - they have whittling knives and penknives. They've all been taught how to use them sensibly, DP and I run a woodcraft folk group and we do a lot of whittling/bushcraft activities. If they ever used them stupidly or took them to school we'd take them off them, but they have had lots of training in knife safety and are very sensible.
And they can all make lovely cutlery, bowls, all sorts of things.

Ooh that sounds just DSs type of thing Finocchio - maybe I should see if there's a woodcraft folk group in our area that he could join ? I've always liked the sound of their approach to things.

I'm afraid I'm in the 'No' camp.

I can't understand why you would be wanting to encourage a child to own a knife He has plenty time in his life, as an adult, to own such a thing. He is a child

Definitely yes, and definitely just for wood craft, whitling in the woods and not on the bus!

I had a pen knife as a child. Let him have one but make sure you teach him how to use it safely and properly and don't let him take it out with him to school or anything.

I'm sure he and his Grandpa will have a great time doing things together with it.

McPhee I would say carving and woodcraft is a quintessentially childlike pursuit.

My boy has had one since about 6 [he now nearly 9] If taught to use properly they ok and great for wood walks, camping, fishing trips. He has a swiss army climbing one so has tweezers etc so useful for splinters.

The kids at Dc's school all learn how to 'whittle' at 6, so I'd have no problem with this (although I did nearly faint at the sight of DS with a 'rambo' knife pinned to school wall)

Maybe get him a little box to keep all his Dangerous Books for Boys essentials in, (including the knife) and he is to keep it in there for safety. I would also agree with the posters above who say he needs to be shown how to use it safely and definety no taking it anywhere that would be deemed inappropriate. Infact, only allowed out of the house if doing a specific task which it was needed for (I dont know what that would be...camping, den making, fishing and the like).

At least if he has a box where it should be stored you can do random stealth checks to make sure its still there.

I'm with the majority here as long as rules are in place and you know you can trust him then let him have one!

oh yes my boy has a shoe box with all his "boy stuff" in that a good idea and he is told to keep it in there not left lying around.
And Mcphee not encouraging to own a knife to go and carry in pocket and randomly threaten people, it is a tool like scissors cut paper, hammer bangs in nails ...

But McPhee part of me thinks that the teenage years (which we are rapidly heading towards ) should be about young people preparing for their adult lives and supporting them as they gain the skills that they will need later.

I feel part of the problem for many teenagers may be that they and their parents don't have a strong enough sense of purpose for these crucial years in the 10 to 20 decade.

[But I'm just guessing in some ways as we are just on the brink of this age with DS (10) and DD (13) - so still in the naive and know-it-all camp !]

I let my 9 yo dd have one earlier this year. She'd been on about it for ages. We were on holiday in Italy last year and she used to look longingly in the windows of those shops they have with knives/guns/general wild boar skinning tools...

Rules are:

• not to be taken out of our house/garden unless by agreement with particular focus on not taking to school or the park or to a friend's
• not to be played with at home unless I'm aware
• not to be kept in her bedroom (has a special safe place in the kitchen)
• training from Dad before it got used

She's had loads of fun whittling sticks and has had no accidents

Yes helpyourself, in an organised group like the 'woodcraft folk', not at the bottom of the garden unaided and potentially unsupervised.

I'm just having trouble getting my head around this. Why are children being allowed to enter an 'adult world' so early on?

What if he slipped and fell on it. God forbid.

I had a pen knife I didnt stab anybody with it cant remember who gave me it . I think as long as your son has boundries with it i dont see the problem , dh has 1 for fishing ,

Mcphee adult world ??? I do not think making a bow and arrow or carving sticks or making dens entering them into adult world ?? The media have demonised knives and what if he slipped and fell ? well what if he slipped and fell whilst crossing the road, holding a glass, near a river, carrying scissors ...
Anyhow it up to you OP but penknife/swiss army hours of fun !!

I appreciate your concern and your contribution McPhee
All views are welcome to help us (and others) make a decision on this.
Like so much in life I don't think it can be a black and white issue.
A question of assessing the risks, including as far as you can, knowing your child - and how you negotiate the situation with them.

I love the idea of whittiling

It's not about carving a bit of wood. It's about allowing a child to have a knife. Why not just give him a chainsaw too

The examples you've said are things which are/may be part of a normal childs journey through childhood. Buying and allowing a 10 yr old to have a penknife, a weapon, is not

Jeez is it any wonder kids think their grown so early. Let them be kids.

I'll leave all of you to wonder at how this is normal.

Personally I think it's great that a 10 year old wants to be out and active like this rather than sat playing on a computer!

10 is a great age for enjoying such exploration when well monitored.

I am begining to feel a little queasy whenever i read let kids be kids , It is a penknife not a machete