to really really not want to hear about Simon Cowell having it off with ANYBODY?

[Lottapianos]

Ick ick ick.

He creeps me out with his false teeth and his inexplicable haircut and his clingy jumpers. And his distinct lack of interest in anything but money. His relationship with his 'fiancee' was so obviously staged to make him look a bit more human, or keep his face in the papers or whatever. Yuck. And what THE JEFF was a grade-A stunner like Dannii Minogue thinking of??? (if the story is true)

I have no idea what his preference is but I don't want to hear any more about what he's been getting up to in the sack. Just horrendous.

Anyone else feel the same?

where can you buy black toilet paper from?

sexy millionaire

Sparkling, I just did a sick into my hand. I need some brain bleach - stat!

I assume SC has paid all these women off so they don't tell all about the crap sex?

Snort @ coco's links

He is not attractive IMO, a bit of an arse by all accounts but he does actually know what he's talking about when it comes to the 'talent' he spots.

Don't give a toss who he's shagging though so YANBU.

Mmmmm black toilet paper?!

It'll be specially made for him, of course.

Thank you sparkling

That's more like it cocolepew - and I'm not much of a huge Cooper fan actually but ANYTHING is better than that horrific photo that Sparkling put up evil cow

You could have a threesome Lotta.

but why would he any black toilet paper...? The big girl's blouse.

I've always though Cowell's hair resembled that of a gorilla's.

<a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?q=gorilla&um=1&hl=en&biw=1024&bih=666&tbm=isch&tbnid=UWr8ZEwQeUKZXM:&imgrefurl=www.uganda-tours.com/&docid=cBf5krbLMdMPnM&imgurl=www.uganda-tours.com/images/gorilla14.jpg&w=326&h=436&ei=N4ORT62cKInD0QXv_ezlAQ&zoom=1&iact=rc&dur=313&sig=110809313250640832680&page=1&tbnh=133&tbnw=99&start=0&ndsp=17&ved=1t:429,r:8,s:0,i:148&tx=51&ty=28" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Cowell

Black to match his soul Cornsyilk

I assume SC has paid off all these women so they don't deny it.

At a pinch, if I'd had a few, and if I was in a marry/shag/shoot situation, then Peter Jones off Dragon's Den. But none of the other squillionaires mentioned. And defo not Branson or (obviously)Lloyd-Webber.

I'm going to get this one so it matches my poo

36 posts and not a single one pointing out that this is all pretend, all a ruse as he is, hmm, well maybe he likes the film Wizard of Oz, that's all. And Max Clifford gets paid very well to keep this film preference out of the papers.

Maybe he takes a lot of iron and his toilet roll matches his poo?

DH is taking supplements at the moment and his wee is an alarming shade of orange

We know it's pretend but just like playing along.

Black toilet paper here:
www.madeindesign.co.uk/b-Renova.html?gclid=COrKqdniw68CFWwntAodpHNMYg&ectrans=1
At that price, I wouldn't be wiping my arse on it - but then I'm not a millionaire

Am sick of hearing about him, obviously not enough decent news. he's not even good looking and I wouldn't care how much money he had, there is NO WAY I would go with him!!

I've not even had my first cider either

Not quite true Hazel - I did say in the OP that I dont know what his preference is but I'm just sick of hearing about who may or may not have been keeping him warm at night. I don't give a fig either way!

Sparkling, I was going to call you a rotten mare but I've decided I actually quite like you and your vomit inducing filthy ways

That pink one would match my toilet seat.

Speaking of toilet rolls my family have 5 on the go at the moment. 5! We only have 4 arses altogether.

now I like the blue....

Ah, phew SwedishEdith. Had a similar convo with my sister today, she was adamant that she had never heard such a suggestion. My mind boggled at her broken gaydar.

we always have loads of toilet rolls on the go...living it large

You must be flushed with money corny