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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to report the woman living across the road?

57 replies

SurroundedByPlasticCrap · 18/04/2012 16:30

We all live in council housing, it's an okay area, not bad schools and all the houses have 3 or 4 bedrooms.

The house opposite used to have a family in it but the wife left and 2 older boys moved out. Was just the man left with his 17 yo daughter when he had a stroke. She had already left school and wasn't working so she became his carer. This happened 8 years ago, before I moved into my house so I don't know all the details, just what he's told me. He's pretty open about his situation and tells everyone.

Anyway when I moved here he would always stop in the street and chat saying how he wished his daughter would get a job. "She just sleeps, drink and smokes all day, saying she's looking after me. I don't need looking after, and the government pays her too." words like this, they would shout at each other in the street too, calling each other lazy and useless.

Anyway I thought it was none of my business. I saw a lady go in and clean once a week and that was that.

Then about a year ago he told me he was moving in with his new girlfriend. I asked if his daughter would be moving out and he said no because she had nowhere else to go. He said he would still claim that he lived there or their benefits would get cut and he wanted a place in case it didn't work out with the girlfriend.

After a few months a bed got thrown in the garden and then 2 couches. New furniture was delivered by Argos, a decorators van was there and I can see sitting room has been wallpapered.

Then the parties started, they are not really loud, but there are drunk people wandering up and down the street, bottles and cans thrown over the fence onto the street. I had a guy sleeping in my front garden and I've had to ask people not to sit on my car 4 times (to be told to fuck off). And the dog shit makes my skin crawl, she has 2 little yappy dogs that shit all over her garden and on the street; and my garden if the postie doesn't shut the gate.

The man comes back to pick up his mail every few weeks and I've told him I've spoken to his daughter about the mess. He said there's nothing he can do, but I pointed out the house was in his name and if the amount of shit all over his garden was considered a health hazard he'd be in trouble. He mumbled about having a word but that was 6 months ago.

I don't know how to report someone and frankly I feel bad doing to but I think benefits are really important and these people are taking the piss. The waiting list for housing is so long and they are just taking up space that could really help someone else.

I know I'm not unreasonable for reporting them, I just want to know how I do it so they don't know it's me, don't want to be shouted at or car damaged.

OP posts:
GreenEggsAndNichts · 20/04/2012 15:09

I think responses have covered it, but I'd like to add that just because someone says in public that they don't need caring for, that doesn't make it true. Both of my mother's parents were very vocal about not needing care, but would have forgotten to take vital medications/ feed themselves unspoiled food/ wash themselves if they hadn't had her around. (and this was in a country where she was not given money by the government to care for them, there was no 'incentive' at all, not that 55 quid a week is incentive! You know what I mean.)

This particular case does sound like fraud, however I just felt the need to say that. carry on.

GavisconJunkie · 20/04/2012 16:08

Although tempted to start a Fred about a Fred, I'll just say it on here.

I am sooo fucking sick o posters unilaterally deciding that an OP is bullshit, usually because it doesn't accord exactly with their no doubt vast personal experience of single situation that any human has ever encountered.

If you think it's bollocks why don't you either report it to mnhq or just close the thread & get on with your life? Really? Why?

There have been so many threads that have turned into really nasty slanting matches recently. Pack it in!

Angelico · 20/04/2012 18:07

I would shop them without even blinking. Truthfully. People like this piss me off on so many different levels, starting with abusing my taxes, right through to being inconsiderate arseholes.

usualsuspect · 20/04/2012 18:25

Who made you the forum police? GavisconJunkie

Birdsgottafly · 20/04/2012 18:41

The may well have been his carer to start with and as another poster said once independant people are often in denial about needing care.

His GF may now be looking after him.

The daughter will have permission to live in the house from the council as his carer. It is him who is committing fraud by claiming and not living there. She would have been entitled to CA with a IS top up, which is a gateway benefiy for HB and CT.

He is entitled to spend three days a week at his GF's, which is no doubt what he will say that he is doing.

The anti-social behaviour is what needs stopping and the Housing Officer is the person to speak to.

The council wil have a duty to house the pair of them,so they would take up 2 flats and if his health fails then he would be more likely to need nursing care if they didn't have the house.

This would cost more than paying the HB on the house.

GavisconJunkie · 20/04/2012 19:21

No one usual, that's kind of my entire point. I am however allowed my opinion every bit as much as you. It's just dull.

usualsuspect · 20/04/2012 19:33

These kind of threads are dull

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