To think every workplace has one???

[peugotgringo]

A weirdo colleague that makes you a combination of ??

We have 3!

that would be me

Yup - one here, on the senior team and known for being a little 'overly touchy' at times!

Yep, several. I am probably viewed as one too.

used to be a guy at my work that would constantly "adjust" himself - not nice when you're sat at a desk and he's stand ing and "adjusting" at your face level

LittleWhite & Yon - what do you do to make yourselves think that?

Currently got a guy here who mutters to himself and in the middle of work converstions goes off on a tangent about something totoally unrelated and he's the one who stares at your tits and tries to look down your top when he thinks your not aware [shudder]

bambino I used to have one like that. I shouted at him once and he denied it as if I was a mad attention-seeker. Luckily a male colleague said: 'Oh come on! You know you do it. It's pathetic.'

Someone else invited a colleague and his wife round and served them a beef stew which was not inedible but not at all nice. They politely ate it and when he asked how it was lied: 'Lovely.'

He then laughed and said to the wife, who was a professional cook, 'Call yourself an expert? That was dog food' and flourished the tin.

limitedperiodonly - the stewed dog-food incident sounds like wierdly pleasing revenge. OUtragious behaviour, but am now intrigued as to what (if anything) the host thought the colleagues wife had done to deserve it...?

Oh my fucking god, no freaking way someone served up dog food??

PLEASE tell me that's an attention seeking made up story?? (not you Limited, but the people involved)

I believe the guests. They were innocent victims of a seriously disturbed individual

Dogfood Man did other strange things and genuinely believed he had legitimate grievances against people who objected.

None of the women liked him because he was condescending and creepy - not the pocket billiard player, someone else. Christ, I've worked with some charmers.

The husband thought we were being meanies and Dogfood Man was just a bit awkward so invited him for dinner. Dogfood man returned the invitation. The wife wasn't that keen because he'd been weird to her all evening but her husband persuaded her to go to be nice.

Husband was known for his ridiculously overdeveloped social conscience. He'd taken Dogfood Man to other events - male things like gigs and football. Even though these would end in a disproportionately high number of 'misunderstandings' between Dogfood Man and other patrons, my colleague thought Dogfood Man just had an unfortunate manner.

Dogfood Man probably thought the wife needed taking down a peg or two. Not that she ever went on about her achievements. We only used to see her at the odd office party anyway. It was her husband who used to rave about her cooking.

I wouldn't have liked to be him in the taxi home

I've posted before about my other friend whose office was terrorised by someone who used to crap in desk drawers from time to time.

People couldn't lock their desks and used to open the drawers gingerly every morning.

The culprit was never caught and is still out there.

Well I wore bright pink patent shoes to work yesterday that earned me a fair few 's! Today is a lovely brass teapot necklace. I do indeed have a small brass teapot nestling happily betwixt my boobies !

If you believe your work place doesn't have one, then It's you....

Oh my god, I can't believe dogfood man done that, how cruel and disgusting!

Limitedperiod not sure i can compete.

We have one who will talk to you whilst his hand down his trousers talking to you.

Also there are two grown men who fell out over a lady in the office which resulted in one "changing" the Xmas lunch order of the other and a subsequent office reshuffle so they didn't have to sit together.

haha, far to busy laughing now at YonWhale

You've reminded me of a friend - and she is indeed a friend not an ex co worker - who insisted on wearing leg warmers on her arms ffs when we out on a night. Bless her, she's ace for dreaming up random clothes combinations!

Oh - and i don't consider a dodgy different dress sense to me as cause for being the office weirdo

One dirty old man undid his trousers in my office to tuck in his shirt. I did not quite "get" why he invited me out for lunch and another time for drinks.

Limitperiod, where do you work???! Bonkers dogfood man is one thing, but friends mystery crapping-in-desk drawer colleague is .... another thing.
Yonwhale, I want your shoes!!!

yon i wear those shoes to work. none here as i work alone but hubby has some that amuse me when he tells me stories.

lol i mean i wear those shoes to church

Oh bloody hell, my office is full of weirdos with the normal people being novelties. If I told all the stories, I would out myself easily, but suffice to say we have a fair few crackers individuals....

We have one who came close to eating human ashes, that was probably the weirdest thing anyone did....

I wear vair high heels in the office, but kick them off and put flats on to go out and get lunch.

Came back one lunchtime, reached under desk for heels to find male colleague had come into my office, crawled under my desk, got my shoes and left me a note in them saying "I love these shoes"

Female co-worked decided he would have at least licked them or worse. Was very eeewww and when put shoes on convinced myself could feel some sort of dampness. Grim

Christ, dogfood man and deskcrapper make the weirdys I have worked with look positively well-balanced.

We have Sleazy Cockney Boss who calls all the women (even other senior managers) 'sweed'eart' and 'treacle' and always tries to go in for hug/grop/sloppy kiss whe hehasnt seen you for...oooh...five mins

Mental Milk Woman, who (honestly) accuses someone most days of stealing her milk from the fridge, and marks the levels with a pen when she has used it in hope that she will one day catch the milk thief out.

We also have Creepy I.T. man that says NOTHING. Literally, he will come and fix your computer and say nothing. He cracks a forced half smile occasionally when he is spoken to, and also looks to my tits a lot, but I have never heard him talk. Ever. In 3 yrs. Currently, he refuses to fix my computer or the computer of a colleague who sits next to me while we are at my desk, because I told the colleague that Creepy IT man talks to my tits and my colleague started calling him Titnology Support.... only Creepy I.T. Man heard and clocked colleague was talking about him and that i must have said something.

Oh dear.

Oh my, there isn't just one at my place - the place is full of them.

My friend came to meet me at work for lunch one day. Sitting in our canteen, she looked around and said: "Jeez, I hope you're out of the building before it takes off!".

'Nuff said.