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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that just occasionally the able of body/mind could accept a little disruption if it makes the life of this with disabilities easier

61 replies

saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 17:07

ds1 goes to a disabled swimming club which has just moved venue. A lot of the people who go are very vulnerable and have quite complex needs. Many have carers of the opposite sex. For example a 60 year old may act as a carer to her brother with SLD's of a similar age and may need to help him get changed.

Last week there was a shutter between the bit the club was using for changing (which led straight into the pool we use - separate from the other pools). The shutter could be opened by anyone but had a sign on it asking that it was closed behind anyone using it. So anyone could access the club's changing area they just needed to close the shutter behind them.

A member of the public complained Hmm so now there's no shutter. This means the club members have lost some privacy and from my point of view it's harder to herd severely autistic into the pool rather than into the rest of the (huge) changing rooms.

Why can't people just look outside their own little world for two seconds and realise that other people have more difficulty accessing pools etc than them?

OP posts:
Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 17:07

Those not this - the trouble with writing a title ion the iPad

OP posts:
Sunnywithachanceofshowers · 15/04/2012 17:13

YANBU at all.

ripsishere · 15/04/2012 17:17

YANBU in any shape or form.
I sometimes wonder at people. My SiLs are prime examples of what you describe. They would consider it their 'right' to have the whole of the changing room (or whatever) and complain until their rights were met. Twats.

Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 17:36

I'm a bit disappointed that the swimming pool staff didn't tell them to get stuffed really. And that's it rip - it's as if they think they're missing out by having an area set aside. Next they'll be complaining about the behaviour of the people with ld's. A couple were gawping at ds1 because he insisted on having a shower but was wearing a towel. I managed to get that off him before it got soaked through and he then went to strip off (he's entering puberty so it's a bit of a sight). In a private area that wouldn't matter at all, no-one from the club would mind but the couple gawping had a couple of kids with them so it wasn't really appropriate and I had to wrestle his trunks back on. It's only a tiny bit of the changing room as well.

OP posts:
GreenEyesAndHam · 15/04/2012 17:41

You're right of course, no question.

AmberLeaf · 15/04/2012 17:45

YANBU at all.

I would write to the management requesting it back if I were you. it seems madness to not have it.

TeWihara · 15/04/2012 17:45

YANBU.

I can't imagine what perceived benefit is there to other users anyway? I'm sorry the pool didn't tell the moaners to get stuffed.

Catsdontcare · 15/04/2012 17:45

You are right of course and I would be putting pressure on the club to put the screen back

Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 17:46

Oh I might email the pool to complain then. The thing is if ds1 goes into the toilets he needs help so I either have to go into the mens or he has to go into the ladies- again when we had a a toilet block that was behind the shutter it wasn't really a problem, but now it's all public and open access it's far more of a problem.

It's only 2 hours a week fgs.

OP posts:
Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 17:47

The club were really cross about it cats.

I'll email later tonight I think.

OP posts:
SauvignonBlanche · 15/04/2012 17:51

YANBU, they have responded to a complaint once so why don't you make your own complaint?

Thinking about it,it's probably only a matter of a couple of weeks before someone complains about the behaviour of a member of your group in the changing rooms anyway. Sad

Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 17:56

Oh yes I'm sure you're right Sauvignon. It was certainly more stressful for me having to ensure that ds1 was publically acceptable rather than just behaving in a way acceptable to those used to Ld's. In the old pool we had the whole place to ourselves. Except for about 10/15 mins in the changing rooms when our session finished and the next started. People complained then about the mixed changing rooms so they cut our swimming time Angry.

OP posts:
Red2011 · 15/04/2012 17:58

Sadly many people are inconsiderate twats who can't see beyond the end of their own noses.

I think you should raise it with the pool managers. If there are other similar groups that COULD use the pool then perhaps see if they could schedule a time to come in to use it too - that way, it's a 'win' for the pool because they're getting more people in, and a win for those with disabilities/SN as they would feel welcome.

Off topic completely but I remember travelling across London a year or so ago with a friend of mine who has some physical disabilities. We got onto the underground (having found a lift so that said friend didn't have to take too many stairs), whereupon two young (20 something) people pushed past us and sat in the seats nearest the door, despite the fact that my friend was getting on the train at the time, holding onto the door with one hand and a walking stick with the other.
I smiled very nicely at the people, pointed to the sign and asked them to please move as my friend needed the seat. They did tut, but they did move.

Consideration and politeness cost nothing but they seem to be a diminishing commodity. Angry

LineRunner · 15/04/2012 18:06

I would email, OP, and ask the pool to reconsider and gently explain why. Perhaps offer to go for a chat on site, so you can come to what I believe is known as 'an acceptable compromise for all concerned'?

And if it's an LA pool, then I should imagine they have to accommodate your club in a reasonable way.

I'm sorry someone has been such an utter knob to you and your club.

Mrsjay · 15/04/2012 18:08

of course you are right and i would complain to the pool isnt everybody entitled to privacy ,

Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 19:42

Yes it is a public pool. A pool which only exists because a lot of the funding for it to be built was tied up n disability related grants. One feature of the pool is that it is so large it never has to close to accommodate different groups so it's not really possible to have the whole place to ourselves anymore. Fair enough, but I do think manage me t haveto understand just how vulnerable some of the users are now.

OP posts:
LineRunner · 15/04/2012 19:45

OP, I think if you contact the pool manager, you should be, as they say, 'pushing at an open door'.

Blu · 15/04/2012 19:49

How ridiculous of the pool management to cave in to idiots when they know the needs of the club.

Since they are so reactive to complaint, a simple petition by club members complaining and demaniding that the shutter be replaced should do the trick. But it is such a * pain that yet again you have to put so much time and effort into getting what should come naturally.

Was it clear to the oublic why there was a shutter? Maybe the pool should put an explanatory notice on it.

squeakytoy · 15/04/2012 19:50

It does sound ridiculous and YANBU, but I wonder if the issuer could have been a health and safety one? Does the lifeguard have clear vision of the pool?

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 15/04/2012 19:52

I would get your club to officially complain, and encourage any other clubs to do the same. Point out to them the benefits to yourselves, and the disadvantages associated with not having a private space.

5inthebed · 15/04/2012 19:55

YANBU. Joe Public can be a right pain in the arse, just in case others are getting more for their money than they are.

Hop youcan resolve it for the better.

CMOTDibbler · 15/04/2012 19:56

I can't believe people would complain. Actually I can, but can't process the thought process that goes on.
Def ring the pool up and complain yourself, and point out the downside to other users of having the shutter up - that might have more effect

thebody · 15/04/2012 20:00

Disgusting but not suprised. Think a thread in here had a
Mumsnet op whining that children in buggies on buses were as important as disabled people in wheelchairs So bloody sad attitude.

Complain complain

landofsoapandglory · 15/04/2012 20:02

If I were you, OP, I would email the pool manager. If I didn't get a satisfactory response I'd go to the local paper.

I am disabled and life is hard enough. Why can't the non-disabled just not be bloody greatful that they have the choice of going everywhere and doing everything(finances/time/family allowing) they want and let the disabled get on and enjoy the limited choices they have? It really pissess me off that there are such small minded pillocks in this bloody world!Angry

EverybodysSleepyEyed · 15/04/2012 20:02

Who knows why the person complained though? i think the Pool management dealt with it badly. Surely all it should have taken was an explanation that the shutter was going to continue being closed.

Just because someone complains doesn't mean the complaint has to be acted on.

i would definitely call them up and ask them exactly why they took action after the complaint and how they propose to remedy the situation given the way they receive their funding

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