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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that just occasionally the able of body/mind could accept a little disruption if it makes the life of this with disabilities easier

61 replies

saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 17:07

ds1 goes to a disabled swimming club which has just moved venue. A lot of the people who go are very vulnerable and have quite complex needs. Many have carers of the opposite sex. For example a 60 year old may act as a carer to her brother with SLD's of a similar age and may need to help him get changed.

Last week there was a shutter between the bit the club was using for changing (which led straight into the pool we use - separate from the other pools). The shutter could be opened by anyone but had a sign on it asking that it was closed behind anyone using it. So anyone could access the club's changing area they just needed to close the shutter behind them.

A member of the public complained Hmm so now there's no shutter. This means the club members have lost some privacy and from my point of view it's harder to herd severely autistic into the pool rather than into the rest of the (huge) changing rooms.

Why can't people just look outside their own little world for two seconds and realise that other people have more difficulty accessing pools etc than them?

OP posts:
Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 20:05

Nothing to do with lifeguards - this was in the changing area. 'our' pool is hidden by a curtain. There are always two or three lifeguards at our pool because a few of the club members have uncontrolled epilepsy and seizures aren't that uncommon (another reason for the need for privacy). The other pools have separate lifeguards as well.

There was a gala on today as well so it was fairly horrendous. Also managed to get unto a fight with a gala leader who blocked ds1's access to the water flumes (brave man - ds1 doesn't take kindly to that!) I may see whether it's better next week and have a chat with the club leaders and will tell them I'm happy to complain if they want me to. I don't want to step on their toes if they're sorting it out.

OP posts:
Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 20:09

Yes I don't really understand what the complaint was about. Apparently a member of the public complained that she couldn't get to her locker, but she could - and it was signposted as such. As far as I can see the bit we are using gets shut off for dive events anyway so we're not the only ones who get occasional exclusive access (and anyway it 's not exclusive as the shutter opens). I think it was fairly clear that the shutter opened as there was a sign asking people to close it behind them.

OP posts:
EverybodysSleepyEyed · 15/04/2012 20:15

maybe they should consider their layout - the woman wasn't necessarily complaining about the reason the shutter is closed but asking that they consider changing where the lockers are?

I'm sure they can't sustain this so good luck!

Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 20:17

Oh there are millions of other lockers. She probably just happened to use one at that end. 90% of the lockers are not in the screened off bit!

OP posts:
Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 20:18

It sounded as if she wouldn't accept the explanation iykwim...

OP posts:
EverybodysSleepyEyed · 15/04/2012 20:18

That is odd - they really should have just suggested that she use another one!

I think they handled it badly!

halcyondays · 15/04/2012 20:19

Yanbu and it seems a really silly thing to complain about.

EverybodysSleepyEyed · 15/04/2012 20:19

x-post

Was it HM Queen? otherwise i can't see one stubborn person should lead them to change their policy!!

EverybodysSleepyEyed · 15/04/2012 20:20

(should add that I don't think the queen would be so nasty!!)

Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 20:20

I know - it sounded as if they did suggest that but she kicked off so they backed down. I do wonder what goes through peoples heads!

OP posts:
thekidsrule · 15/04/2012 20:21

people can be very selfish

YANBU

sad that people can not look further than their own circumstances

Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 15/04/2012 20:22

Ha ha - Tom daley was asked to stop doing something (diving I think!) because it was upsetting one of the club members and he did Grin bless him. I heard that story third hand so it might be wrong but I think the message is that he is a Jolly Nice Chap. Go Tom!

OP posts:
Peachy · 15/04/2012 20:22

Also agree you should complain.

We stopped taking ds1 swimming as we couldn't send him into the Men's changing rooms alone, but he wasn;t allwoed in the female rooms after 8. We tried disabled facillities but he went into the loo alone once when I was wrestling (also ASD) ds3 and he was hurt by some older kids for using teh facillities when he apparently wasn't disabled (which is clearly why he now attends an ASD Specific comp, idiots).

Many, many years ago now- but ds3 is a similar age and ds1 still can't go off alone so we gave up. We shouldn't have, we should have fought.

Good luck JJ

Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 16/04/2012 22:46

I complained. Will await response.... Brew

OP posts:
LineRunner · 17/04/2012 20:17

Good for you. Hope you get somewhere.

FlorenceDaphne · 17/04/2012 20:23

Is it the new Life Centre, JimJams? I would think they'd not relish appearing to be unsupportive of people with disabilities, bearing in mind the fanfare of its opening. I hope you get somewhere with your complaint.

thebody · 17/04/2012 20:29

Good on u for complaining, if no joy try local press.

RevoltingPeasant · 17/04/2012 20:30

Ooooh yes it is the Plym Life Centre?? I saw Tom Daley there the other week swoon

Ahem. Anyhow, what I meant to say was, I will email too if you give me the address! All Plym MNers should!

bialystockandbloom · 17/04/2012 20:41

YANBU of course. Selfish narrow minded tossers.

tazzle · 17/04/2012 21:05

going swimming is certainly not easy is it .... I go regularly to four different pools and each has its "delights".

but the worst one yes it has one designated disabled changing room.... yes it does have a changing bed and hoist.....but also a zimmer frame, chair and sundry other items which leaves little room for wc plus two people. Oh and if you ring up to ask if the hoist works and are told it is ... dont trust that it does and get changed ... test it first so that its only the journey thats wasted. This happened three times at least recently .... and no changes made to the room despite comments in person as well on on line /e.mails

There is only one hour swim available and in that time everyone has to get changed... if the dc room in use we have to either use the designated for baby changing cubucles ( if available cos theres lessons goig on too) or squeeze two people (who can be of different genders) into changing cubicles for 1:1 support.

It led to such frustrations one day I overheard one father asking the people coming out of the disabled cr why they had taken half an hour as he had now lost his swim time with his son ... tempers became frayed and I heard this man being sworn at repeatedly. He had a valid point , I dont know the requirement of the other party.

The cause however imo ..... so little facility available in such a limited time for a lot of people.

We got out one day to find barriers across all the big cubicles to be told it was for the schools session ( not due in for 20 minutes !!!) .... removed when I pointed out that cuddly me and 6' tall man do not fit in small cubicles !!!

The most frustrating thing I find is that despite lanes being sectioned off for those who want to swim up and down steadily so many just dont use it even if there is plenty room ..... they spread out over the width of the pool and while some so swim around other people do "tut" or glare if we dont move out of their way.

We do all however get to unwind going to the pub after for lunch !

Original poster
saintlyjimjams · 18/04/2012 08:59

Yes the life centre. Great pool and ds1 loves the slides (which is a bit of a nightmare as we now need TWO people to go swimming - one top of slide, one bottom) but it is harder than having the whole of central park as we used to have. We can't use Plympton pool (well I can't take ds1) as there's nowhere I can get him changed, except for the occasional disability session during the school holidays (anyway it's freezing!)

I haven't had a reply, but will see what happens on Sunday, actually bugger just realised I'm not going to be able to go on Sunday unless I get a helper in.

OP posts:
EdithWeston · 18/04/2012 09:06

I'd really like to know on what grounds e complaint was made, and why it was upheld. I do hope you find out.

This sort of thing stinks: it reminds me of the notorious incident at Leatherhead (?) when a manner of the public complained about patients at Headley Court using the pool at all. In that case, the pool management fully supported the disabled users, but it still left a nasty atmosphere. Of course in at case, the complaint was silly and trivial. This case might have better underlying cause, but right now I cannot begin to imagine what one could be.

LifeHope11 · 18/04/2012 09:56

Hallo saintlyjimjams, I am glad you complained about this and hope it results in this decision being reversed.

It is a shame though that you have to face all this frustration & upset, and spend time/effort in complaining because a few people (like the original 'complainant') don't want to consider the needs of the disabled & think their own convenience takes priority.

I posted the recent thread which someone mentioned here, about the refusal to clear the wheelchair space for our disabled DS on the bus.....there are unfortunately people selfish & stupid enough to disregard the needs of the more vulnerable members of the community in this way, they are a minority but there are still enough of them to make our lives hell at times.

maybenow · 18/04/2012 09:59

actually i blame the pool entirely - they could EASILY have said to the 'complainer' that they have a policy of not discriminating and that the shutter is required for the disabled swim club to enjoy swimming like anybody else so sorry if it's any inconvenience.

i would guess there are more people in and attached to your club than there are people who would complain so the pool have shot themselves in the foot there in terms of goodwill.

some individuals will always be either selfish or just simply ignorant of others' needs but the institutions have no excuse.

LifeHope11 · 18/04/2012 10:37

maybenow: you are spot on. The pool management should have upheld the needs of their disabled visitors not caved in to this complainant.

Actually, they may well have a legal obligation to ensure that provision is made (ie the shutter or alternative means) to safeguard the privacy & dignity of their disabled visitors, ensuring they are able to access the pool like everyone else..so if they refuse to restore the shutter, you don't have to leave it there saintly but suggest you find out just what your rights are. Unfortunately the disabled & their carers are frequently being put in the position of having to fight & argue for rights that are already legally theirs.

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