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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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to want to take my pushchair into my doctors surgery?

999 replies

gillquil · 09/04/2012 22:39

my g.p surgery has just banned pushchairs, I've them a letter that follows, is this the norm? or should I just change our G.P.?

Hello,

I would like to make a complaint about the forthcoming ban on pushchairs in the surgery from the first of April. I am a mother of three, my eldest child has just turned four and we have a double pushchair which we normally use for our two youngest. My youngest child has just turned one, and as is typical for his age, he wants to crawl and climb all the time, he definitely doesn?t want to sit on my lap while I wait, he will however normally wait happily in his pushchair, or sleep in it while we wait or during our appointments. My two year old daughter just wants to run around.

If I am unable to bring my pushchair into the surgery I am going to have to let my son crawl over the floor in the surgery which I can?t imagine being the most hygienic thing to do. Or when he is asleep I will have to wake him, and what if both he and his sister are sleeping? do I really want to wait for my appointment struggling with a sobbing two year old daughter and a crying one year old son, my handbag, and changing bag on the floor or on the seat next to me. All of which, toddler, and baby and baggage have to then be carried into the appointment. I would also like to know what is suggested for mothers who need for example to have their young child with them during say a smear test? Should I leave him to crawl around the floor in the surgery during this?

Parents that I know often rely on being able to entertain a young child or children in a pushchair so that they can speak to their G.P. or nurse for a few minutes uninterrupted. Or the child sleeps on through their appointment and waiting time, and the parent can have a proper conversation or treatment.
I don?t have the option of arranging childcare for the times when I need to come to the surgery, especially as we normally ring at 8 a.m to see what appointment we can get if any for that morning.

I asked about the security of the area that has been designated for pushchairs to be left. As far as the lady I spoke to knew, there is none, it seems that the surgery is relying on the area being ?out of sight.? I disagree anyone walking past will be able to see a row of unsecured pushchairs. Pushchairs cost as I am sure you know an enormous amount of money. We live close by and two of my neighbours have had pushchairs stolen from outside their own front doors in the last six months, and we had a child?s scooter taken ourselves. It was suggested also that I buy a bicycle style lock for our chair, but I can?t see what I would secure it to.

While I can see the need for some sort solution to the congestion in the waiting room, as a result of parents and children who are patients at XXX Surgery using pushchairs, I don?t feel that just telling people their only option is to leave their pushchairs outside, in an unsecured area, and carry in their child or children and changing bags, handbags and who knows even their shopping, is acceptable. In fact I think it?s discriminatory. I have spoken to several mothers today who are patients at XXX, as are their children, and they all agree, and have said they will be putting forward their comments also.

I look forward to your reply and hope that XXX can be a bit more creative in finding a solution that doesn?t leave patients feeling unwelcome.

OP posts:
YouOldSlag · 12/04/2012 18:37

MissCoffee. For your information I used a sling for the first six months with my DS. It was a Close Baby sling and I loved it. However, when he got heavier I could not carry him as I have asthma and I could either walk OR breathe, not do both.

I am all in favour of baby wearing but it's still OK to use a pushchair if it suits you better. I can't, others can't or don't want to, it's FINE to use a pushchair FGS.

MrsWobble · 12/04/2012 18:40

at the risk of being reasonable here if you refer back to the op she sent her letter and got a reply telling her that the change was made as a result of health and safety issues. this is extremely unlikely to have arisen because the GP woke up one morning worried about congestion in his/her waiting room but because they were inspected. as a result, their public liability insurance would be invalidated if they did not take action.

so, you can either have the gp shut for everyone or you can help them address the problem.

otchayaniye · 12/04/2012 18:41

another one who back carried a 2-3 year old daily while pregnant and i never found occasion to use anything else.

NOT that i'm suggesting everyone ought to do this!

MissCoffeeNWine · 12/04/2012 18:45

Of course it's fine.

Never said it wasn't.

Again, discussing possibilities for a place where your pushchair cannot go does not mean I am against you using it. I don't care what you use.

Again, why is it ok to suggest highchairs and bumbos but if I suggest a sling which does the same job in the confine of the same environment that is somehow silly and to be ridiculed, and means I am vilently anti-pushchair? Despite my suggestion of putting it under the pushchair on the way to the surgery and then using it as you go in to help you?

Really, why?

crashdoll · 12/04/2012 18:47

Who is going to pay for these highchairs and bumbos? They'll still take up some space!

YouOldSlag · 12/04/2012 18:49

I don't understand the attachment to pushchairs really or the idea that you can't manage without one

Maybe it was this ^ remark that makes you seem "vilently anti pushchair" (sic?

MissCoffeeNWine · 12/04/2012 18:52

Yes, saying 'I don't understand' several pages ago actually means 'I am violently against' (typo) and hasn't been clarified at all in the discussion since. Hmm

Whatmeworry · 12/04/2012 18:52

at the risk of being reasonable here if you refer back to the op she sent her letter and got a reply telling her that the change was made as a result of health and safety issues. this is extremely unlikely to have arisen because the GP woke up one morning worried about congestion in his/her waiting room but because they were inspected. as a result, their public liability insurance would be invalidated if they did not take action.

Well, the obvious alternative to banning the pushchairs is to remove H&S legislation that is forcing the changes and persuade the insurers not to hold the surgery liable if anything goes wrong, or get the NHS/practice/whatever to fund a move/extension of the surgery to fit in all the pushchairs.

Now, how realistic is that ?

MissCoffeeNWine · 12/04/2012 18:55

Good point well made whatmeworry

crashdoll · 12/04/2012 19:01

Some lovely attacks on other people's parenting here. Hmm

YouOldSlag · 12/04/2012 19:05

MissCoffee, yes bit saying "I don't understand why people do XYZ" suggests an "anti" stance.

I don't understand why people can't do without cars. Does that make me sound pro cars or does it make me sound scathing about car users?

(hypothetical by the way, car fans!)

WhatMe- fair point. I agree such decisions are not made just to annoy mothers. However, Surely a surgery must be fit for purpose? If the waiting room is cramped and cannot accommodate patients/pushchairs etc, is it fit for purpose?

And if a surgery is inaccessible to pushchairs then presumably wheelchairs can't get in either? Obviously pushchairs are optional and wheelchairs are not, but access is vital or a surgery is not fit for purpose.

yakbutter · 12/04/2012 19:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

oopsi · 12/04/2012 19:38

Ok then -all you people who can't control a 2 yo without a buggy , how about reins or a wriststrap?

pumpkinsweetie · 12/04/2012 19:50

Forgive me for being dumb but i honestly thought slings were for babies up to a year old? And babycarriers were for older babys/toddlers?
I wasn't meaning to crititise any sling users i just didnt realise a 2 year old could go in a wrap like sling thing Confused
I have never used one for a toddler because i didnt realise they even did them except for the big metal backpack type carriers which would not be pratical when sitting in a surgery?
Sorry if i offended anyone i just didnt realise, i have a solution to this problem now after much searching-a phil and teds wrap thingy i have seen that attaches to chairs to seat your child in surgery and it would easily fit under a buggy Smile

5madthings · 12/04/2012 19:50

i can control a two yr old without a buggy but its much easier to have them strapped in a pushchair where they will sit happily whilst i speak to the dr, i suspect it might be slightly difficult to have a toddler on reins desperate to go adn explore whilst i am trying to talk to a dr or get undressed so they can examine my eczema.

ds1 was fine without a pushchair from 12-18mths he walked nicely, held my hand if necessary, never ran off and would sit happily in a drs surgery etc, ds2....... total opposite, crawled at 5mths, walked at 9mths once he could crawl he could climb and yes i used reins at times, but if he then lies on the floor screaming and refusing to move, it was far easier to ahve him strapped in a pushchair where he would be content for a while to sit, if he would out of a pushchair he wanted to explore, simple as that.

ds3 again an early crawler and walker, but more ameanable than ds2, ds4 later to crawl and walk but once he could he was very like ds2. now he is just 4 and will sit fairly well with a book, small toy etc. dd is 16mths, just walking and if out of the pushchair wants to climb, expolore etc, again standard behaviour for her age. so far easier to have her strapped in the pushchair with small toys to occupy her, once out she wants to roam about and as she is not that steady on her feet reins would just be a trip hazard tbh.

slings, reins etc are all options that will work for some children and not all, having 5 i have seen the huge differences that different personality children have, some are more compliant, or as my nan used to say about ds1 'what a biddable child he was' i had no idea what she meant until i had ds2!

oops it was you wasnt it that questioned my mh history and the fact that i hadnt mentioned it before? yes in an earlier post i talked about my eczema as that is the main reason i go the drs now. but yes after ds4 i did have pnp and then pnd and was very ill and hospitalised for a while. i didnt mention it in the earlier post as it wasnt relevant to the point i was making at the time.

when a later poster mentioned how having pnd meant going to a drs without her buggy meant she didnt go i THEN mentioned my mh, as tbh at that time if i had had to take 4 children, the little one a baby and a toddler and the others 6 and 8 to the surgery without a buggy then i wouldnt have gone, my health was fragile and the littlest of things seemed a huge challenge.

what wasnt relevant earlier had become so in the context of the progression of the thread. i wasnt aware that you had to mention ALL your health history in one post, but thanks for the doubting, so glad it was 4yrs ago and i am well now, comments like yours essentially questioning the validity of my post wouldnt have been helpful when i was in the midst of severe mh issues.

pumpkinsweetie · 12/04/2012 19:54

Ive found it philandteds.com/products/feed/wrigglewrapper
It is called wriggle wrapper and attaches to any chair Smile
And you could put it under your pram.
A good solution for all our problems, and i dont care if im judged for using it Grin
I admit my kids can be naughty-so what were not all perfect Grin

ClaireAll · 12/04/2012 19:56

pumpkin,

I used my wrap sling until around age 4. 4 of my 5 children were quite happy to sit on my hip in this. Obviously for a four year old, it would just be for short bursts, for example when getting on a train (with fold up buggy in one hand, and other child on the other).

I think in the doctors' waiting room scenario, I wouldn't be using a sling on an walking toddler as I'd expect them to be independently mobile.

5madthings · 12/04/2012 19:56

philandteds.com/products/feed/wrigglewrapper

the link should now be clickable, goes to see if it is really able to attach to ALL chairs, as i had one that wasnt!

TheBigJessie · 12/04/2012 19:58

I think we should transport our toddlers around in those little red scoot-along cars they sell in ELC.

The reasons are three-fold:
If I use a pushchair for a toddler, I am asked to leave it outside;
If I use a sling, people will say, that's terrible for your back/isn't he walking yet/he's all squashed
If I make them walk/use a bus, people complain about us taking up seats. Or they feel sorry for the tired tantruming bundle on the pavement on the way home. Grin

pumpkinsweetie · 12/04/2012 19:58

I agree 5madthings-what was said about you earlier was very rude.
Unfortunetly there will always be some with no sympathy-its the way in which theyve been bought up Grin
On the other hand others do actually have sympathy and have been taught to respect others Smile and im glad im one of them.
All kids are different not one size fits all

5madthings · 12/04/2012 19:59

its essentially the same thing as the cloth highchair i had for mine when little, not sure if it would fit all chairs? plus in my surgery there are no chairs actually its soft benches all along the walls so actually it wouldnt work at all!

they look ok, not sure about the strapping them down in it to have a nap! mine wouldnt have stood for that at all!

its the independently mobile bit that makes it a problem claireall not all mobile toddler will sit still in one place, if they spot things to explore etc, some of my 5 would have, others wouldnt.

pumpkinsweetie · 12/04/2012 19:59

The wriggle wrapper could be a solution but imo prams should be allowed when possible Smile

ClaireAll · 12/04/2012 20:00

But did you let them, 5mad?

5madthings · 12/04/2012 20:03

let them? it may be hard to restrain them when i have a baby and am seeing a dr where i need to strip off in order for them to examine my eczema!

but as a rule they can explore where it is safe to do so, but in for example a restaraunt then no they are expected to sit nicely but they are at a table, will have a snack toys, the problem with a surgery waiting room is its more open plan, much easier for them to get down off a seat and try to explore, and if i was bfeeding a baby etc it was easier for the toddler to be strapped in a pushchair, ds1 would have jsut sat nicely, ds2, who walked at 9mths, not for a million years!

pumpkinsweetie · 12/04/2012 20:04

ClaireAll-its not about LETTING them is it??
Toddlers can be wild and uncontrollable thats what they are supposed to be like if you come from a normal planetGrin
My kids will sit still but not for long periods especially when we have been seen up to half hr late grrr but my surgery allows prams so no probs for me but i dont know how people manage without