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AIBU?

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Original poster

to expect you to take your shoes off in my home?

299 replies

BelleTheBeatnik · 06/04/2012 21:34

That sounds so much more confrontational when I use direct address! [bublush]

I'm not criticizing those who don't remove shoes in their own home, but do the British automatically do it at other people's houses?

Asking this question is a life-long supporter of slippers, by the way. [bugrin]

OP posts:
Ilovedaintynuts · 09/04/2012 08:23

LST, I wouldn't refuse to take my shoes off. Of course not. Your house your rules. It would just make me uncomfortable and I wouldn't enjoy myself.

SodoffBaldrick · 09/04/2012 09:00

Knock yourself out then,LST - when you come found to mine, you can insist on removing your shoes, I really won't mind! I'll internally shake my head at the uptightedness of it and just think 'relax' but I won't argue with you. [buwink]

The office/shop comment was purely because people said that shoes were for outside, like coats. No, they're not only for outside. Clearly - we wear shoes inside all the time (offices, shops), in a way we don't wear coats inside.

mummy23x · 09/04/2012 09:23

Thumbbunny - You must be one of those who refuses to take off their shoes in someone elses home when they have a baby crawling around on the cream carpets or wooden flooring.

To most people all those with that kind of attitude on here i'll quote some of them - "Im far more important than someones cream carpet" "I would never visit a friend who asked me to remove my shoes" (shoes are always dirty, I'll add) what kind of people are you! I'm so glad and lucky to not have any of you as friends!

I think most people would consider you to be spoilt pretentious little brats! who need to get over your little selves! its basic hygiene, respect and bloody good manners!

Stop getting your knickers in a twist and take some criticism as you are WRONG

Thumbbunny · 09/04/2012 09:27

Wow, you are something, aren't you. Assumptions, presumptions and bollocks attitude.Hmm

I do whatever the host asks of me, as it happens.

LST · 09/04/2012 09:31

baldrick I wouldn't relax with shoes on and as for uptight?? You don't know me. I just like my house with out dirty marks on the floor. If you like that sort of thing I'm not judging you.

Kladdkaka · 09/04/2012 09:32

*what kind of people are you! I'm so glad and lucky to not have any of you as friends!

I think most people would consider you to be spoilt pretentious little brats! who need to get over your little selves! its basic hygiene, respect and bloody good manners!

Stop getting your knickers in a twist and take some criticism as you are WRONG*

So most people, do you think I'm a spoilt pretentious little brat for not removing my shoes? (Bearing in mind that I've already explained up thread my reasons)

mummy23x · 09/04/2012 09:48

Kladdkaka

I dont know your reasons but would you refuse to take off your shoes in my home with my 7 month old crawling around??

ifancyashandy · 09/04/2012 09:56

Wow mummy23x, could you be any more offensive stop shouting?! It's a Bank Holiday FGS!

It's rude to make guests feel uncomfortable in your home. I take shoes off in my own home because of comfort, not due to dirt-based paranoia. If I visit a friend, I will have considered my outfit & my shoes would be part of that. I would think a host rude, unwelcoming, more concerned about their home than making me feel relaxed and uptight if they asked me to remove my shoes.

I would take off muddy / wet etc shoes as I'm an adult and can make that decision for myself.

crashdoll · 09/04/2012 09:59

I would never refuse to take my shoes off but I hate it. I have severe rheumatoid arthritis in my feet and walking without a nice thick sole is so painful. Also, my feet are ugly even in socks and I'm self-conscious. Oh but please do not offer me your manky guest slippers. That is just one step too far!

ifancyashandy · 09/04/2012 10:00

Mummy23x, I would take them off if you asked. Of course - I'm a polite guest. I would consider your feelings. Unlike the host in this situation...

But I would hate it, feel uncomfortable, think you were uptight & would want to leave. I would hesitate to return.

SodoffBaldrick · 09/04/2012 10:04

mummy23x, yeah, not doing anything to dispel my feeling that the 'shoes off brigade' really are not much craic... [bugrin]

Enjoy your spic and span floors.

Kladdkaka · 09/04/2012 10:09

mummy23x I wouldn't refuse as such, I just wouldn't come in.

exoticfruits · 09/04/2012 10:15

Perhaps people will hand out overalls next before you sit on a sofa (especially if a pale colour)

GreatBallsOfFluff · 09/04/2012 10:19

I always take my shoes off in other people's houses as I grew up having to do it every day at nan's house and feel uncomfortable if I don't but I couldn't care less in my house its up to the person. I was a nite Shock however when a friend visited recently, left shoes on but then promptly bent one knee up and put said shoe on my chair.

GreatBallsOfFluff · 09/04/2012 10:21

nite bit (stupid phone)

Bunbaker · 09/04/2012 13:27

"If I visit a friend, I will have considered my outfit & my shoes would be part of that."

Grin I am probably not posh enough to grace your home then as I tend not to "carefully consider" my outfit when going round to a friend's house for a coffee for an hour.

I can't understand why people get so uptight about this. I am amazed at those who would rather not visit someone than take their shoes off in their house (people with health/mobility issues excepted).

I am happy to do either. If the house is cold I would rather keep them on, but if they have nice fluffy cream carpets I would be happy to remove them. I think some people are looking for an excuse to be offended. I like my friends very much and would never want to offend them by refusing to remove my shoes. By the same token I don't ask visitors to remove theirs, although most do anyway because we have a shoe rack full of shoes by the door and we wear slippers in the house anyway.

yakbutter · 09/04/2012 13:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

yakbutter · 09/04/2012 13:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

usualsuspect · 09/04/2012 13:34

Mummy23x , awful username btw , Theres not a chance in hell I would ever visit someone like you , so keeping my shoes on wouldn't be a problem.

TanteRose · 09/04/2012 13:34

its not just homes in Japan, though...

shoes are removed at the doctors, dentists, at Japanese style restaurants and hotels, schools (for parents evening/afternoon, school concerts etc.)

as someone mentioned upthread, workmen will take their shoes off every single time they come into your house (and will often lay plastic sheets on the floors where are working)

you don't have to take your shoes off at work, or in shops...actually, no, you DO in clothes shops, when you go into the changing rooms to try on clothes.

You just get used to it Smile

Bunbaker · 09/04/2012 13:37

Why is it so important to you usual? I'm curious that's all.

usualsuspect · 09/04/2012 13:40

I don't know one single person that makes people remove their shoes.

usualsuspect · 09/04/2012 13:41

Its a very MC thing to do , I reckon.

yakbutter · 09/04/2012 13:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

usualsuspect · 09/04/2012 13:43

I don't want to see peoples bunions and manky toenails thanks , nor do I want people looking at mine.