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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wonder what happened to 'proper' mealtimes?

222 replies

undercoverPrincess · 29/03/2012 10:47

Just lately all the kids parties we go to seem to involve serving food (mostly sandwich type buffets but at one McDonalds) at times that are between mealtimes (between 2 and 3pm)?

I just don't get this, I try really hard to get into a good routine and give my children a good attitude regarding what they eat / snack on and when and I don't like them being re-fed between meals?

One party started at 12.30 so I didn't know what to do, I have DD a snack before but the food came out at 2 so the kids that hadn't had lunch like my DD were probably starving. Then come teatime she didn't want her proper dinner.

We have been invited to another party like this next month and I'm sorely tempted to refuse the invite but will feel bad as I know my DD will want to go :(

OP posts:
Haziedoll · 29/03/2012 11:03

If your child is over 2 you are stressing unnecessarily. It's good to install good eating habits but you don't have to be a slave to it. As they get older you adapt depending on what you are doing. In the school holidays I find that we might have a late breakfast and skip lunch, sometimes we might have snacky meals. You need to lighten up a little.

CurrySpice · 29/03/2012 11:03

And you do realise that being a bit peckish isn't fatal don't you?

ChaoticAngel · 29/03/2012 11:03

Do people really need to eat at the same time every day? Confused

I'll sometime have tea between 5 - 5.30, other days it can be gone 7pm.

Ragwort · 29/03/2012 11:06

Your life must be pretty boring organised if you have 'set' meal times surely?

I remember one mum from toddler friend days who would always go home 'for a proper lunch' at a specific time regardless of what the rest of us were doing - surely if it is a sunny day and you are out enjoying yourselve in the park lunch might be later, or if it is cold and miserable you might want something early?

We never have meals at the 'same time' each day - it depends what we are doing/where we are going/how hungry we are etc etc

Bangtastic · 29/03/2012 11:08

Bloody hell, complete overreaction. And it is actually better to eat many small meals throughout the day rather than 3 big ones Wink

ninani · 29/03/2012 11:09

Whenever we have to go to an event where I know dinner is going to get served late I give my children dinner before hand, even a bit and then they can snack if they want to!

RachelWalsh · 29/03/2012 11:18

I think you need to relax a bit about this. Having a rough routine is one thing but a rigidly timed approach to when you can eat isn't realistic or healthy. I doubt many adults live like that.

You're considering stopping your children from going to parties because they'll eat at the wrong times? So they miss out on social occasions with friends because you're uptight about food?

Fast forward 20 years...

OP's dc - Was my mother unreasonable to never let us go to anyone's birthday parties as children because we would have to eat at times she hadn't approved?

Everyone - YES

imnotmymum · 29/03/2012 11:19

So OP are you going to let your DD be wild for the day and go to the party and eat at will [I love parties free food !!] ???

scuzy · 29/03/2012 11:20

OP what age is your dd?

LeQueen · 29/03/2012 11:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MagsAloof · 29/03/2012 11:22

A 'proper meal' at a kids party? I have never heard of this. Its always sangers and crisps and cakes, surely?

Chill out. or be one of those freaks mus that brings their own food in a tupperware container

Biscuit
tantrumsandballoons · 29/03/2012 11:25

What time do you think parties should be?

What if you have lunch every day at 12pmsharp and other parents have lunch at 12:30 or 1 pm or 1:30 or.....you get the picture Grin

Or is there supposed to be a universal lunch time for children??
If so, I missed that Sad

Ephiny · 29/03/2012 11:25

Surely there's no harm in eating a bit earlier or later than usual occasionally? I don't see the issue with 'overfeeding' - if your child has lots of sandwiches or cake at the party, then just give her a smaller dinner than usual that evening, she probably won't want much anyway.

LeQueen · 29/03/2012 11:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NoMoreInsomnia12 · 29/03/2012 11:28

YABU "Proper mealtimes" is one thing that can cause obesity. People eating at set times because of social pressure instead of eating when they are hungry.

DurhamDurham · 29/03/2012 11:31

A routine is one thing (a good thing, in fact) but you are way beyond this. Why would you possibly refuse a party invite just because your child will eat at a different time to usual, or Heaven forbid have an 'extra' meal?
Food shoud be enjoyed, it's not a weapon to use against your family.

Seriously need to chill before you set yourself and your child up for a lifetime of issues.

Birdsgottafly · 29/03/2012 11:31

Your children don't need a 'proper dinner' every night, they just need a range of nutrious foods over a short time span.

You are getting to hung up over food.

CurrySpice · 29/03/2012 11:31

tantrums I missed that memo too!

And am I the only one who wants sausage rolls and iced gems for lunch now? I might even eat it at 11:45 just to be really crazy

tantrumsandballoons · 29/03/2012 11:34

Yes lequeen all wrong.

There should be a sit down lunch, no crisps, cakes, kids party food

And it should be served at the universal lunch time for children

And when you find out what time that is, please let me know

tantrumsandballoons · 29/03/2012 11:35

GREGG'S sausage rolls, curry spice?

WilsonFrickett · 29/03/2012 11:35

I'm totally going to have my lunch now. Right now. It may even be a sausage roll.

Share the iced gems Curry?

Ephiny · 29/03/2012 11:36

I have actually started eating my lunch at 11:30 because I was hungry :)

WilsonFrickett · 29/03/2012 11:37

What ya having?

The sausage roll I thought was lurking in the freezer is gorn and Curry won't give me an iced gem Sad

CurrySpice · 29/03/2012 11:37

I don't do sharing Wilson because my entire moral compass was smashed when I once ate lunch at 12:23 in 1972

farewellfigure · 29/03/2012 11:38

I'm going to whisper really quietly that I think it's a bit odd as well. But I certainly wouldn't stress about it or stop DS from going. He went to one the other day when the party food came out at 3.30. He'd had a small cooked lunch and then had his bit of cake when he got home for tea. I have always been really anal about mealtimes since he was a baby and put himself on (whisper even more quietly) Gina Ford's timings when he was 3 months old. Nothing to do with me...I couldn't bear the idea. He was just hungry at the same time every day to the minute. Anyway...we're both a lot more laid back now that he's 4. I've been known to give him his meal HALF AN HOUR LATE!

Seriously OP...chill out and don't worry too much. It's not every day. Enjoy the parties and just let your DS get on with it. :)