To tell this mum to bugger off

[Midnightmoon]

or something along those lines.
I went to pick up Dd1 from school today, I had Dd2 in the buggy and Ds holding the back 'helping'. We were waiting outside and one mum came up to me and started talking. I had never really seen her before though I'd heard she was a gossip, I thought I'd give her the benefit of the doubt as I didn't know her. She had a Ds around the same age as mine and both Dss went off to the playground which is enclosed and we could see them both.
She asked me if I had the car, I said 'Oh No walking today, I'm on ML so we have been walking when it doesn't rain'. She asked where I worked and why I had to use the car. I explained that if I didn't use the car I wouldn't be able to reach the school in time to get Dd.
She asked did we have internet in our house. I said yes, she told me how evil it was.
She asked why my Ds was running around 'so much' (He was running just like her son and like most 2 year olds) so I said he was just playing. She said its because your son has ADHD. I just said well yes he has it but he was just being a normal child. I asked who told her that. she said 'oh around' and shrugged. She then blamed it all on Tv and sugar. Which her children don't even ask for anymore.
She asked where my Dh was. I said he was working. She said 'well if you are a single mum it's okay to share I won't judge and your kids are clean not like X's mum' I said I didn't want too know about X's mum and I wasn't a single mum so it didn't matter anyway.
She asked how old my Dd1 was so I told her she was five and she said oh you must of been young when you had her. She then went on to say but you had a Ds before that didn't you so you were a teenage mother.
I said that was none of her business. She asked if my Dh was the dad too all my Dc's then. I said yes he was and then moved away from her.
She tried too follow me and when she caught up asked
So what happened to your first Ds then, he died didn't he.
I told her too go away as I was not talking about my personal life with her.
She said Oh well it must be a hard thing to talk about. Should I get you a number for a therapist.
The children then came out so I collected Dd1 and Ds and left.
Dh thinks I should of told her to go to hell.
So should I next time?

She sounds mentally ill, and definitely socially challenged. I would completely ignore her, if she approaches you just look distracted and move on. I would not allow her to engage you in any further conversations at all. And I'm sorry that she did that to you - its unsettling at the least and quite hurtful too.

I too, think she has mental health issues. I would stay far away from her.

It's a bit sad that we mostly think she has MH issues and our advise is to cray away from her

She is an arse. Ignore her - with this kind of attitude, she will have no friends. I hope she didn't upset you x

Troisgarcons- so someone with learning difficulties/disabilities is a nutter? Nice. How very grownup and tolerant of you

Some people are so rude, you behaved very reasonably.

I'm not an angry person as a rule, but I think the comments about your ds1 would have made me tell her to fuck the fuck away before I did something I'd regret!

I hope you can avoid her and not let her poison upset you!

If this lady does have MH issues or similar rather than walk away is there anything that could be done to help her?

I'd talk to the Head and share your concern. Maybe not for yourself but for the sake of her kids

When somreone you have never spoken to gets deeply personal, I'd say you are well within your rights to tell her where to shove it.

She sounds nauseating.

Bearcrumble After what her nasty MIL said to her I think its a tad insensitive to bring that thread up?

Ignore above 2 replies. Posted on wrong thread

i would go up to her (in fornt of people) and thank her fo her concern about you. tell you yourself are very worried about her social skills as she is obv inept, rude, no personal space/ sensitivity awareness and that you are worried she might be on a spectrum aswell.

id provide a fucking printout too

to be fair she sounds as though she is not quite the full ticket and so probably is totally unaware of how she comes across and how upsetting her comments are .

For that reason I wouldn't be unkind to her or ignore her; I would just nod and smile and avoid where possible.

I remember your other thread op. I remember at the time thinking it was very bazaar as the things your mil was complaining about didn't really make any sense and were none of her business and inappropriate for her to say . . .

looks like you attract them!

I certainly wouldn't do what you suggest LWM - that's really bullying, whatever way you look at it

littlewhitemice - that might be the cathartic thing to imagine doing, but actually doing it would be really mean IMO!!

And I suspect your target audience wouldn't think much of it either - this is the way to make yourself look like a proper bully. I'd start avoiding YOU if I saw this happening...

do you have any MH issues OP?

I think what littlewhilemice suggested would be fine to do if the woman DOESN'T have any special needs. If she's just a rude horrible woman then she deserves it.

I would blank her next time. Refuse to make eye contact. If she persists, respond with a curt "You are terribly rude to be asking me all these questions and judging me." Then turn your back on her. Repeat as necessary.

What littlemice suggests though, is that all people 'on a spectrum' behave like this. So it is wrong on both levels.

Perhaps you should find some personal stuff out about her and do the same as what she did to you, only in front of loads of other people.
Gossips are generally very bored, do you live in a village by any chance?